Young Writers Society


E - Everyone

Home

by stygianmoon17


Home is where the heart is,

But where does the heart go

When nothing remains. Where can it

Heave itself and sigh

After a long, drawn-out day?

Where does the heart go,

When nothing remains,

But the dusty floorboards

And the sickly light filtering though the window,

Where does it go, where does it go,

The heart hopes one day it’ll know

But for now it carries itself day after day

Across the dusty floorboards

Below the filtered sunlight,

Hoping one day, it’ll find a home.


Note: You are not logged in, but you can still leave a comment or review. Before it shows up, a moderator will need to approve your comment (this is only a safeguard against spambots). Leave your email if you would like to be notified when your message is approved.







Is this a review?


  

Comments



User avatar
86 Reviews


Points: 4030
Reviews: 86

Donate
Wed Dec 14, 2022 8:06 am
View Likes
loveissourgrapes wrote a review...



Hello @stygianmoon17! This is a very good writing of yours. Sometimes when you feel lost, away from your home and your family, you can feel down and sad. And if they're completely gone, where does your heart go if it belongs there? I feel like poem also tells like if you're very exhausted and tired from a long, hard day, you just need to go home and be with the ones you love. It's pretty devastating and sad because your home is gone when you weren't around and were busy working for it but it just disappeared. But there is hope because one day, you will find your new home. Over all, it is really good. Keep up writing and have a cozy Christmas! It's 11 days later and I'm so excited! Have a good day^^




User avatar
15 Reviews


Points: 591
Reviews: 15

Donate
Wed Dec 07, 2022 5:33 pm
View Likes
angxlari says...



howdy!

this is well written, i love the subject. its obvious and blatant, yet gives the reader room to wonder and think on their own or maybe relate.

it gives off feelings of mental exhaustion and almost desperation and i think that is something most readers can relate to. my favorite line is "where does it go, where does it go, the heart hopes one day it'll know." the repetition makes the truth sink in, where does it go? there really is no choice but to carry on, which is what follows in the next lines.

one thing i would like to point out though is that the way the words cut off creates a weird break within the flow. maybe its just my ocd autistic little brain though LOL.




User avatar
15 Reviews


Points: 591
Reviews: 15

Donate
Wed Dec 07, 2022 5:33 pm
View Likes
angxlari wrote a review...



howdy!

this is well written, i love the subject. its obvious and blatant, yet gives the reader room to wonder and think on their own or maybe relate.

it gives off feelings of mental exhaustion and almost desperation and i think that is something most readers can relate to. my favorite line is "where does it go, where does it go, the heart hopes one day it'll know." the repetition makes the truth sink in, where does it go? there really is no choice but to carry on, which is what follows in the next lines.

one thing i would like to point out though is that the way the words cut off creates a weird break within the flow. maybe its just my ocd autistic little brain though LOL.






ahhh thank you for the kind review <333
the weird break of flow is part of the style, glad you noticed ^^



Random avatar

Points: 8
Reviews: 4

Donate
Tue Dec 06, 2022 12:58 am
View Likes
Parks0311 wrote a review...



This was super good! I found myself being able to heavily relate to it because recently my house was destroyed by a hurricane and I have had to hop around from place to place. Thank you so much for writing this. It was very interesting to hear your take on a well known saying such as "Home is where the heart is". It was nice to see someone take on a deeper meaning than just the surface level interpretation on such a saying. Keep up the great work! I look forward to reading more.




User avatar
518 Reviews


Points: 101
Reviews: 518

Donate
Sat Nov 12, 2022 7:27 pm
View Likes
vampricone6783 wrote a review...



The heart is lost and can’t find a home. It has lost the touch for love and needs to be loved once again. It has been forgotten and covered in dust. It needs to find love once again. Once more, it will find love again. One day. But for now, it is waiting for love. I like how this was written. You can feel how pained the heart is at the moment.

I wish you a nice day/night.






thank you <333




Doubt is not a pleasant condition, but certainty is absurd.
— Voltaire