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A Carolina Millennial in A Prehistoric Tribe: Chapter Six, Part One

by MaybeAndrew


Chapter Six

A Basic Understanding of Time Travel

One-Sided Knowledge is much more destructive than ignorance. It is the father of pride.

-Paul Meyers, The Worshipers Dilemma 

Having a mother who is a nurse and going studying human biology at college for that for a while, I've spent a fair amount of time around doctors, but never have I had such a complete roundabout physical. After looking at every corner of me in detail, they took my weight, height, blood pressure, scull circumference, and tooth size. Then I gave them all forms of samples, blood, urine, and DNA. Then a full-body X-Ray, MRI scans, and they sused out of me the two times I had smoked as a teenager.

I bet they could have reconstructed my entire diet and habits from what they learned. And they probably would be disturbed by the amount of Pizza Bites and High Chews I'd consumed within the last week.

After those strange 3 hours, I was released and found Charlie and Josh waiting for me outside of the medical offices.

"How'd it go?" Charlie asked as we began to walk back in the direction of the Joshes office.

"I feel strangely violated in a way. I think I should probably have to sign something before they stick a camera up my butt." I said before I could stop myself. 

"You do. You just already did. After all that stuff you signed for Gertrude, we essentially own your body now, medically speaking. If you die, you will be studied for years, and if you don't, you should expect checkups like that at least once a week." Josh said, no humor in his statement. 

"We're exposing you to almost entirely unknown partials. We need to keep you healthy," Charlie added, his voice ringing with its characteristic friendliness.

"And if we don't, then how we need to know how not to kill the next guy," Josh said, a matter of factly as we passed Gertrude and her desk. We entered the circle of doors where his office had been.

"Out of curiosity, where are we going?" I asked. As you can see, I'm pretty bad at shutting my mouth. 

"The Room of Ra, the center of project Seo." Josh replied as we stopped in front of a large metal door. It was eight feet tall, two men wide, and had a large silver frame and a steel submarine-style crank. It looked like it could withstand a blast from a tank. It was flanked by two gun-wielding soldiers. I couldn't help but notice the British flag on their uniforms. How many governments have their hands in this?

"Good to see you, Steve, Johnson," Charlie said kindly, nodding at each of them. They nodded in return.

"I was wondering about that. Why did you make me sign some of the medical paperwork before the job? In fact, why did you bring me all the way out here, for that matter, just for an interview?" My mind spun on, with each new piece of information forming new questions and new reasons why Jenna was wrong to break up with me. 

"We needed to see you, regardless of whether you got the job or not," Josh said as he finished punching a code into the door. "You were of extreme interest to us."

"Why?" I asked, bewildered. Hoping in my heart of hearts for some answer about how I was super special.

"I saw you. When I underwent destiny touch- " Charlie began.

"Remember Charlie, this is not just about the science. Why don't you wait to explain it until we are somewhere with fewer possible ears." Josh said as he finished scanning his thumb and key card. The door hissed and swung out. He stepped inside of the next space. I followed. It was a short hall, ending in another door. It was all a bright painted white, and the walls were made of a sort of plastic sheeting, supported by metal tubing. The lights above were blinding to look at, and illuminated the control panel of buttons and switches along one wall. Josh pulled three wristbands off the wall. "Put these on. We need to measure everyone's vitals while we are in there. Any fluctuation could mean something." He said as the door closed behind us, hissing as it sealed again.

"This is the airlock." Charlie explained as we put on the bands, "Everything inside of the Room of Ra is regulated."

A hissing confirmed this as the temperature and smell of the air changed, a small light above the panel switched from red to green, Josh pressed a button and flipped a switch, and the next door hissed opened.

***

Josh closed the door behind us, and a silence instantly fell upon the entire room. I didn't realize the pressing deep that had weighed me down in the dome. It must have come so gradually as we approached and been so ever-present I hadn't noticed it until I was gone.

The room was carpeted, the walls were a light grey, and the ceiling a pattern of black foam panels. The place was brightly lit, but there was nowhere I could look to see lights, it was just perminating behind the panels making a sort of optical illusion of no source. In the center of the room was a box, lined in white paneling, and with a glass window to the inside. Beneath the window was a sort of control panel, with switches and buttons and daily. The inside of the box was the only dark space in the room, so I peered in with curiosity.

"What do you think of telescope into the fourth dimension?" Josh said, gesturing around proudly. 

I smiled, "it's different. Not as spacey as I thought." To be honest, I was a little underwhelmed. 

He laughed, "No, we have no space suits or rockets. We delve through the mind here. We have discovered the slightest disruption can affect our measurements and subject, so this room is completely soundproof. It's actually suspended, an earthquake could happen, and we wouldn't know. The air is completely self-supplied and filtered. Not a single grain of dust floating in this room isn't supposed to be here."

"I feel guilty about not showering this morning then." I joked nervously.

Charlie chuckled, "The Room of Ra is the center of project Seo, and as a result, the center of Athena."

"And," Josh added, "The only place, besides my office, where anything we discover in here can be spoken of, this project is of the utmost secrecy, and nothing we learn can escape these walls."

"So that's what I was wondering about. Why bring me to Athena if you might not hire me? Wouldn't that risk the secret?"

"Because, like I said, you were of great interest to us, Mathew Meyers." Josh said, "But before we can get to that, you need to understand what happens in this room. Charlie, get me the tablet." Charlie went over to the shelving and pulled out a silver tablet, and then came over and handed it to Josh.

"You claimed earlier today to be able to read the paper explaining the science and translate it into simple terms to the rest of us." He looked down his Speedmaster watch, "So, we'll give you fours hours to read that and think up your explanation. Charlie will stay in here to oversee you, and since he has some work to do in here anyway. Nothing you read on that tablet can be repeated to anyone besides Charlie and me, and nowhere besides this room. And that's not just something you'd get fired for. That's years of federal prison. We aren't just advancing science anymore, we are advancing statecraft and governments."

What Gabriello had said came back to me, and my stomach churned. I wasn't just important to the future of science, but the future of war. To think two days ago I was eating frozen pizza in bed. I marveled. 

"So, Goodluck, I'll be back in four hours, and we'll see if you can keep this job," Josh said as he walked to the door.

"Sounds good," I said, trying to hide the quivering in my voice. Josh stopped on his heels and whirled, "Oh yeah, just in case your own imprisonment isn't enough motivation, we have agents positioned near your nieces and nephews' house." His lips curved up in a smile, but it didn't extend to his eyes. "Happy reading." He said in a sing-song voice. 

***

Part two of the chapter linked on the side and below (:  ====> 

https://www.youngwriterssociety.com/work.php?id=152532#c724322


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Wed Sep 15, 2021 6:31 am
HarryHardy wrote a review...



Good Morning/Afternoon/Evening/Night(whichever one it is in your part of the world),

Hi! I'm baaaaackk...ahh, these are being split into parts...which means chapters are getting larger...hmmmm...this should be fun then.

First Impression: Well...this sounds like a really fun place to work at there....I have a feeling that all the ulterior motives that these people all seem to have are really going to hinder the progress of the actual science of things.

Anyway let's get right to it,

A Basic Understanding of Time Travel


Oooh...that sounds like it should be pretty fun...

Having a mother who is a nurse and going studying human biology at college for that for a while, I've spent a fair amount of time around doctors, but never have I had such a complete roundabout physical. After looking at every corner of me in detail, they took my weight, height, blood pressure, scull circumference, and tooth size. Then I gave them all forms of samples, blood, urine, and DNA. Then a full-body X-Ray, MRI scans, and they sused out of me the two times I had smoked as a teenager.

I bet they could have reconstructed my entire diet and habits from what they learned. And they probably would be disturbed by the amount of Pizza Bites and High Chews I'd consumed within the last week.


Well the second part is a bit exaggerated, but ahh, you do like to see these folks conducting a through examination here before letting him do anything, you never know what might be hiding inside that could affect something as delicate as the idea that Charlie has conjured up here.

After those strange 3 hours, I was released and found Charlie and Josh waiting for me outside of the medical offices.

"How'd it go?" Charlie asked as we began to walk back in the direction of the Joshes office.

"I feel strangely violated in a way. I think I should probably have to sign something before they stick a camera up my butt." I said before I could stop myself.

"You do. You just already did. After all that stuff you signed for Gertrude, we essentially own your body now, medically speaking. If you die, you will be studied for years, and if you don't, you should expect checkups like that at least once a week." Josh said, no humor in his statement.


See this is why you don't sign anything that a government makes you sign without reading every single bit of fine print and then also consulting a lawyer.

"We're exposing you to almost entirely unknown partials. We need to keep you healthy," Charlie added, his voice ringing with its characteristic friendliness.

"And if we don't, then how we need to know how not to kill the next guy," Josh said, a matter of factly as we passed Gertrude and her desk. We entered the circle of doors where his office had been.


Well these two both seem to think of Matthew as a bit of hamster here...a hamster they care about but wouldn't mind the death of all that terribly...aand I'm worried on behalf of the poor guy.

"The Room of Ra, the center of project Seo." Josh replied as we stopped in front of a large metal door. It was eight feet tall, two men wide, and had a large silver frame and a steel submarine-style crank. It looked like it could withstand a blast from a tank. It was flanked by two gun-wielding soldiers. I couldn't help but notice the British flag on their uniforms. How many governments have their hands in this?

"Good to see you, Steve, Johnson," Charlie said kindly, nodding at each of them. They nodded in return.


Hmm....well...that seems like a fun room, also love the names we've got going on here...it also helps keep track of these rooms to have their names be somewhat tethered to their purpose here.

"I was wondering about that. Why did you make me sign some of the medical paperwork before the job? In fact, why did you bring me all the way out here, for that matter, just for an interview?" My mind spun on, with each new piece of information forming new questions and new reasons why Jenna was wrong to break up with me.


Well that's a question that I was also asking...also ahh love that last line there.

"We needed to see you, regardless of whether you got the job or not," Josh said as he finished punching a code into the door. "You were of extreme interest to us."

"Why?" I asked, bewildered. Hoping in my heart of hearts for some answer about how I was super special.

"I saw you. When I underwent destiny touch- " Charlie began.


Hmm...well I guess that could be fine...but still did they really need to bring him in, whatever it is that was strange seems like they could've found out by paying the man a visit, I mean he did nothing but participate in the interview and he was already being chased out...it didn't seem like anything else was being done to the man not to mention they don't have to tell him all these science facts to find out whatever it is they want to right? I mean, it is being purposely kept quiet here, but so far, I haven't seen him do anything besides that interview and if he hadn't gotten the job, the interview seemed like the only thing that he would be doing.

"Remember Charlie, this is not just about the science. Why don't you wait to explain it until we are somewhere with fewer possible ears." Josh said as he finished scanning his thumb and key card. The door hissed and swung out. He stepped inside of the next space. I followed. It was a short hall, ending in another door. It was all a bright painted white, and the walls were made of a sort of plastic sheeting, supported by metal tubing. The lights above were blinding to look at, and illuminated the control panel of buttons and switches along one wall. Josh pulled three wristbands off the wall. "Put these on. We need to measure everyone's vitals while we are in there. Any fluctuation could mean something." He said as the door closed behind us, hissing as it sealed again.

"This is the airlock." Charlie explained as we put on the bands, "Everything inside of the Room of Ra is regulated."

A hissing confirmed this as the temperature and smell of the air changed, a small light above the panel switched from red to green, Josh pressed a button and flipped a switch, and the next door hissed opened.


Hmm..well that seems quite appropriate for a highly classified and potentially quite dangerous scientific device, not to mention seeing the characters enter a place like that is really exciting.

The room was carpeted, the walls were a light grey, and the ceiling a pattern of black foam panels. The place was brightly lit, but there was nowhere I could look to see lights, it was just perminating behind the panels making a sort of optical illusion of no source. In the center of the room was a box, lined in white paneling, and with a glass window to the inside. Beneath the window was a sort of control panel, with switches and buttons and daily. The inside of the box was the only dark space in the room, so I peered in with curiosity.


Alright, that's a decent description...although hmm, for all the hype this is a bit small and a little bit underwhelming....although of course we don't quite know exactly what this thing here is meant to be anyway.

"What do you think of telescope into the fourth dimension?" Josh said, gesturing around proudly.

I smiled, "it's different. Not as spacey as I thought." To be honest, I was a little underwhelmed.


Yeah you and me both Matthew, you and me both.

He laughed, "No, we have no space suits or rockets. We delve through the mind here. We have discovered the slightest disruption can affect our measurements and subject, so this room is completely soundproof. It's actually suspended, an earthquake could happen, and we wouldn't know. The air is completely self-supplied and filtered. Not a single grain of dust floating in this room isn't supposed to be here."


Hmm...so suspended in what exactly, also I don't think that's going to prevent an earthquake from being felt...unless this is underwater in some kind of suuuper gyroscope mount, you're definitely feeling an earthquake. Anything else like magnets and whatnot will be affected by an earthquake. Also for the whole "self supplied air" where does that come from...and wouldn't that give this a link to the outside through some kind of tube...its not like you can recycle the same air in such a small room.

"I feel guilty about not showering this morning then." I joked nervously.

Charlie chuckled, "The Room of Ra is the center of project Seo, and as a result, the center of Athena."

"And," Josh added, "The only place, besides my office, where anything we discover in here can be spoken of, this project is of the utmost secrecy, and nothing we learn can escape these walls."


Hmm, considering it is soundproof, that's quite literal too...and I love that :D Although hmm, so I guess only these folks here actually know the full scope of what's happening and that does make sense. This being in the center also makes a lot of sense.

"So that's what I was wondering about. Why bring me to Athena if you might not hire me? Wouldn't that risk the secret?"

"Because, like I said, you were of great interest to us, Mathew Meyers." Josh said, "But before we can get to that, you need to understand what happens in this room. Charlie, get me the tablet." Charlie went over to the shelving and pulled out a silver tablet, and then came over and handed it to Josh.


Hmm, this reason being danced about ever so much is a bit weird, like why would they tell him soo much and then keep this one random detail a secret...well...anyway, that better be a very, very good reason cause right now, its not convincing at all.

"You claimed earlier today to be able to read the paper explaining the science and translate it into simple terms to the rest of us." He looked down his Speedmaster watch, "So, we'll give you fours hours to read that and think up your explanation. Charlie will stay in here to oversee you, and since he has some work to do in here anyway. Nothing you read on that tablet can be repeated to anyone besides Charlie and me, and nowhere besides this room. And that's not just something you'd get fired for. That's years of federal prison. We aren't just advancing science anymore, we are advancing statecraft and governments."


Boo...this guy just has to do the standard silly threat...well, I guess Matthew should've known this anyway when he was getting himself into this situation, also I get the feeling prison is for the lucky ones...death is usually the preferred punishment for situations like this.

"Sounds good," I said, trying to hide the quivering in my voice. Josh stopped on his heels and whirled, "Oh yeah, just in case your own imprisonment isn't enough motivation, we have agents positioned near your nieces and nephews' house." His lips curved up in a smile, but it didn't extend to his eyes. "Happy reading." He said in a sing-song voice.


Hmm, well, I suppose that's not too bad. At least they're not currently held hostage, if anything, that's free security for said nephew and niece...if you want to think on the bright side...but hmm, on the other hand...I think the hamster theory is accurate here. Oh well, even the good guys in situations like this one aren't exactly good. Also see this is a much more powerfully delivered subtle threat, you feel this one as a reader, this is what I was talking about when referring to the childish insults there by Gabriello.

Aaaaand that's it for this one.

Overall: Overall, this chapter is coming along nicely. You picked a pretty nice spot to break this into two here...xD, I almost want to run off to review that next part right now but I will restrain myself till the next day. Anyway, I think perhaps once I fully catch up I'll give a more general overview of the story as a whole...for now this is all I've gotta say. :D

As always remember to take what you think was helpful and forget the rest.

Stay Safe
Harry




MaybeAndrew says...


Thanks so much for the review! I will be sure to edit those points.



HarryHardy says...


You're Welcome!!



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Thu Sep 09, 2021 5:19 pm
ForeverYoung299 wrote a review...



Hey!! Forever here with a review!!

Then a full-body X Rey, MRI scans, and they sused out of me the two times I had smoked as a teenager.

I guess you meant sussed? That was a pretty interesting detail tho.

That's a lot of torture actually. A veryyyy problematic situation Matt is in. And the worst thing is these governmental people are actually violating Government laws, I suppose. I don't have the slightest idea of the laws in Foreign countries but well, I do think that there should be some laws regarding privacy and that those shouldn't be violated. It's a pity that here the organization to fix the laws are disregarding them. The most worst(I like emphasizing) thing is not able to do anything. He seems to be frustrated and that is quite a normal and usual reaction from his side.

We got a very shorf idea of the profession of Matt's mother. I liked the way how you showed that.
"I saw you. When I underwent destiny touch -"

This is a very significant dialogue and I think it's better to specify the speaker here. When I read the line for the first time, I thought the speaker was Josh and then when I read the next line, I had the impression that the speaker was Charlie. I am quite interested to know who the actual speaker is. It's of great significance. I am also excited to know what the person actually saw during the time travel.

That was a good description of the room there. I just hope Matt will succeed doing the task. If he isn't quite successful, great trouble is in store for him. Best of luck to Matt! Also if he succceeds, I will get a good view of the thing.

Keep Writing!!

~Forever




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Thu Sep 09, 2021 4:17 pm
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MailicedeNamedy wrote a review...



Hi MaybeAndrew,

Mailice here with a short review! :D

So the story moves quickly, which I like. I like that you did a short timeskip since the last chapter. I also think you created a good "introduction" to Matt's everyday life and what it will be like in the future.

I liked the chapter a lot. It had a lot of dialogue, which made it a very smooth read. I especially liked that a lot of it sounded kind of logical and comprehensible and not too much information was given away. I definitely thought it was very professional.

What I missed a bit during the dialogue was sometimes seeing the emotions Matt feels, or sees in Josh and Charlie. Sometimes I had the feeling that you couldn't always tell whether someone was speaking with excitement or in a neutral voice. But I also think that only one or two sentences would be enough to express that.

I liked the descriptions. Especially because they are always told a bit from Matt's perspective, so you always learn something new that he knows about. For example, in your introduction you introduced us to his mother indirectly, where I'm also convinced that this time she was mentioned for the first time.

Finally, I have to say that so far you have a good pace in moving the story forward. It's not stagnant, and it's not too fast, which I like a lot so far. You have this good mix of dialogue and descriptions.

And finally finally, you forgot the link to 6.2. :D

Some other points that caught my eye:

full-body X Rey,

X-Rays are written with an a.

I think I should probably have to sign something before they stick a camera up my butt."

Wait until Matt gets to the age of having regular gastrointestinal endoscopies. :D

large metal door. It was 8 feet tall, two men wide, and had a large metal frame and a metal submarine-style crank.

To try not to overuse a word, you can try to describe it in adjectives, for example, how it would feel when you touch it, the consistency or the colour. This way you can avoid the word "metal" here. I would try to get by for at least three or four sentences without using the word if it is in a description. (Dialogues excluded.)

Have fun writing!

Mailice




MaybeAndrew says...


Thanks for the review Malice! I agree that the description of the door needs editing, and I'll be sure to edit those other points!
Thanks again!




You sound like you're becoming emotionally involved with the custard.
— Nikki Morgan