Young Writers Society

Home » Literary works » Short Story » Romantic

E - Everyone

Falling into Love

by eilisBK


“Have you ever fallen in love?” The question startled me from my reverie.

“What?”

“Have you ever fallen in love?” His eyes remained fixed on the sunset, always staring straight ahead. I thought for a moment. Had I ever fallen in love? I had been with numerous people in the past; some for a few years, others a matter of days. But did I fall in love with any of them?

“I… I’m not too sure. What does falling in love feel like?” My question seemed to irk him. He sighed and looked down, shaggy hair hiding his eyes.

“It’s hard to explain.”

“Try. Try for me.” It was then that his eyes, his eyes filled with storms and pain and something else I couldn’t place, met mine.

“Falling in love…” He hesitated a moment, eyes fixed once more to the blaze on the horizon. “Falling in love is like walking a paper thin line above oblivion. You don’t know what’s at the bottom, so you do your absolute best to remain on that line. Sometimes you meet certain people, people that make you lose your balance, people that make you pitch towards that void. But you hold back, regaining your footing… and sometimes the person that tripped you is lost to the void. They tried to pull you down with them, but you wouldn’t let go of the line.”

“That doesn’t sound very nice. I thought love was meant to be a nice feeling.”

“But it is nice,” He whispered. The world around us was so still. Just us, the burning sky and the unknown beneath the deathly thin line we walked. “Love is nice because one day you’ll meet that person. That person that you fight with, that you cry with, that you laugh with. That person that sticks with you no matter what. That person that wriggles into the darkest corners of You no matter how hard you try to keep them out. That person is your person. And one day, the void doesn’t seem so scary anymore. You take that leap,. You dare to trip your person up, dare to pull them down with you. And sometimes they let you. And you fall together. So I’ll ask again. Have you ever fallen in love?” His eyes burned into mine, burned hotter than any star. I said nothing, simply took his hand and stepped into the void. Limbs tangled, we fell. Fell into oblivion.


Note: You are not logged in, but you can still leave a comment or review. Before it shows up, a moderator will need to approve your comment (this is only a safeguard against spambots). Leave your email if you would like to be notified when your message is approved.







Is this a review?


  

Comments



User avatar
36 Reviews


Points: 87
Reviews: 36

Donate
Sat Jul 24, 2021 3:08 pm
View Likes
RealSadhours296 wrote a review...



Mmmmh this is some good content right here!

The introduction is perfect! The dialogue is amazing, and the theme is portrayed very well! It's a shame I don't know who these people are but if it's part of a bigger work like you've said most of your bits will be, then I'm all on board with finding out who they are in the future!

The way the man described love seems pretty accurate for me. I had the unfortunate circumstance of wanting to jump into oblivion with someone that was always unsure, and eventually decided to move on. It might take a while but I'll maybe one day get back up on that line.

Keep up the good work!




eilisBK says...


Thank you for the review, the praise is very much appreciated! This was actually a standalone piece and I've never thought to create a story around it or flesh out the characters further. Your review has definitely given me something to think about and who knows, maybe these two will make a reappearance at some point...



User avatar
384 Reviews


Points: 18696
Reviews: 384

Donate
Sat Jul 24, 2021 7:55 am
View Likes
ForeverYoung299 wrote a review...



Heyyyy! Forever here for a review.
So, the critiques first. I have got only a couple of them.

“Falling in love is like walking a paper thin line above oblivion.

I guess there should be a on between walking and a
That person that wriggles into the darkest corners of You no matter how hard you try to keep them out.

I like the capitalization of you. It puts a lot of emphasis on the topic. Put a comma between You and no. It needs a break.
Apart from those two minute mistakes which can be easily fixed, your story was just awesome. I like the concept of that line. As long as I can remember, I have never seen anyone describing love in that concept. You really did a good job with the story and the twist in the end, though I kind of guessed it, was fantastic. Overall, it was a great definition of love.
Keep writing!
~Forever





I lingered round them, under that benign sky: watched the moths fluttering among the heath and harebells, listened to the soft wind breathing through the grass, and wondered how any one could ever imagine unquiet slumbers for the sleepers in that quiet earth.
— Emily Bronte, Wuthering Heights