Hey, Mika here with a quick review! Also, I haven't reviewed your other works that you've requested me to, and I sincerely apologize!
To start off, this is a beautiful poem, it flowed really well! There can be some improvements though. I don't read a lot of poems so don't take my feedback too seriously, but I hope I can help at least a bit.
" he was deep red and shiny but then he split into a grin with teeth" I see that you've corrected
SHINEY to SHINY (from the other reviewer) but "A grin with teeth" does seem quite odd. This may be the way you write, so take my feedback with a pinch of salt! It's just a suggestion after all. Even though the vocabulary and language used is quite a low-level and easy to understand, it's a great poem and it's very nice and well done!
Oh my gosh, you published this two years ago! Haha I'm really sorry for not reading and reviewing your recent ones, this poem just drew me to it!
Keep it up, I'm excited to read more of your writings!
Points: 1446
Reviews: 34
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