Young Writers Society

Hello! Here for a review!
First of all, increase the size of the letters and I guess the font colour is also a bit lighter than black. Pls change these things. It makes it hard to read. You should also give time on thinking how your readers find your story interesting only by seeing it, even before reading. There are several readers like that. Also, it's kinda hard to read moving it side by side. Maybe just write it on YWS. But, I am really curious about how you made it.

I blabbered a lot I guess. Now, coming to your story–
The story was a good one! It described their school life. I have a little question–do you have more than one main character? The title is the story of an introvert. So, I deduce there is only one main character and that is Ruth. If yes, you should add more of Ruth's part in this chapter.

And I have a suggestion for you. Most of the novels revolve around incidences basically. As these chapters are a bit short, could you just post the chapters as 1.1, 1.2... instead of 1,2? Because those resembles parts of a chapter. When you feel an important incident has ended, you can just make it chapter 2– 2.1, 2.2... Like this. It's a mere suggestion.

Your story is a bit fast-paced I think. Time is flying very soon it seems. Could u just slower the pace a bit? And this chapter is a bit different from your actual topic. It doesn't shows an introvert in any way. I suggest you to expand this chapter a little becuz the reader will not be contented after reading this. Yes, of course, you can leave your reader with a thousand of questions after reading a chapter which makes the person to read the next one. But then also I suggest you to elaborate it a bit.

This is all. Hope it helps.

~Forever

@ForeverYoung299

I only realized yesterday that you had asked me to tag you when I write this...So, sorry about the delay but here's the second chapter. Also, I'm not sure if you read the first chapter after I extended it, so here's a link just in case:

The Story Of An Introvert-1

Hi NivedaJames22,

Mailice here with a short review!

I like how the story comes right into focus. You get a little insight into school life in your well written dialogues. I like how you've given the characters different sentence structures, which gives them all their own style and personality.

What I found a little strange for the short chapter was how the light turned more on Anna than Ruth, and for the rest of the chapter Anna was the focus (along with Talmeer). In the previous chapter it was shown more like Ruth was the main character, but apart from that brief interaction with Anna, there wasn't much there. This is not a negative criticism, it's just something that made me wonder a bit when I read it.

What's a little lacking for me in this chapter is how everything "floats" a little from the story. You created something tangible in the last chapter that isn't really there in this chapter. As mentioned above, I miss that inner life of Ruth. Now we have only seen the look of Anna and one can only conclude that Ruth seems a little unfriendly. If one did not read the first chapter, the reader might assume that Anna is the focus and then be surprised when Ruth is there in the following one.

If the next chapter is more about Ruth and told from her perspective, I think in contrast to this very dialogue-intensive chapter, there should be one where you describe more things. What do the places look like, the school, where they both are? What does Ruth see and how does she see it from her eyes? Maybe put in some thought processes from her so you discover more of the inner life of Ruth. Little differences like that would then affect the overall picture and make this chapter shine from a different light once again.

I think the only criticism I can make here is the structure of your text, that the lines are so long and you have to scroll the text back and forth. But I think that must have happened in the formatting.

In summary, I can say that you have a very good way of conducting the dialogues and sending the reader straight into this world with short and concise statements. What could be improved is the insertion of some descriptions - or should it be restructured in the next chapter as described above. I can't give an overall picture until I get to know Ruth better. I'm curious to see what happens next.

Have fun with the writing!

Mailice.