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12+ Violence

Silenced Night

by dancingontheclouds


Silent night...Holy night...

I wake up with a smile on my face. Granted, I always do. It's molded on my face, after all. I watch Amelia get dressed into an ugly blood-red Christmas sweater. She must be going to see those parents of hers. Of course, the it doesn't cross her mind to take me. It's fine; she's only human. I'll come anyway.

I'm a doll, by the way. I'm 37 years old. I belonged to Amelia's mother, then Amelia, and then the closet. I have a beautiful red dress, which covers some unpleasant stains, and I came with a kitchen set. I have a knife.

I love my knife.

Amelia walks out the door, humming a tune. I think it's Silent Night, one of my favorites. I see her car pull out of the driveway, and I smile in my head. I close my eyes.

I open them, and I'm in Amelia's car.

All is calm...All is bright...

I look outside, at the snow-covered trees. At the decorations. The red lights.

Amelia turns on the radio, and Elvis Presley comes on. They say he died of a heart attack. Makes you think...

We pull into the driveway after a little while, and Amelia gets out. I close my eyes.

I open them, and I'm in front of her. She screams and drops her purse. I grin in my head.

The knife comes out.

Sleep in heavenly peace...


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308 Reviews


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Thu Sep 16, 2021 5:22 pm
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RandomTalks wrote a review...



Hey Momo!

RandomTalks here with a short review!

Okay, I need a moment to clear my thoughts first. This was truly something else, I am sure I will not be the first to say that I absolutely did not see that coming.

I wake up with a smile on my face. Granted, I always do. It's molded on my face, after all.

Your introduction was extremely intriguing and from the very first words, you get this upsetting feeling in the pit of your stomach that simply screams something is not right. Especially your use of the word 'molded', it was subtle and brilliant at the same time.

I have a knife.

I love my knife.

The way you narrated the story in the first person made it all the more chilling. You did not use big and complicated words and were rather direct and straightforward in your narration. And I guess, in stories like these directness is more than appreciated. It matched so well with the tone of the story and I honestly got goosebumps when I read this part. What in the world is a doll doing with a knife?

I liked the way you kept it vague, not giving us any more information than was needed for the story. It makes you wonder and question and just sit still for a while trying to to understand what happened. Your word choice especially was so very cunning, and I don't think you could have narrated the doll's perspective any better than you have. Ah, now I will be dreaming about a doll in a red dress, grinning at me while holding a knife. I thank you for that imagery.

At least, I have learned from this never to guess the story after reading just the title. This has taught me forever.

Keep up the brilliant work and I hope you have a great day!






Thank you!!



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Sat Dec 19, 2020 2:44 pm
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HarryHardy wrote a review...



Good Morning/Afternoon/Evening/Night(whichever one it is in your part of the world),

Hi! Here to leave a review!!

First Impression: This is a pretty scary little short that you've got here. I think it does a good job being properly scary especially with the kind of ending you had. Well let's break this down just a little.

Anyway let's get right to it,

Silent night...Holy night...


Well that's intriguing...

I wake up with a smile on my face. Granted, I always do. It's molded on my face, after all. I watch Amelia get dressed into an ugly blood-red Christmas sweater. She must be going to see those parents of hers. Of course, the it doesn't cross her mind to take me. It's fine; she's only human. I'll come anyway.


Whoa, that is quite an entrance there. Straightaway hinting at the fact that our protagonist thinks humans are beneath them and introducing the other character too. I also love the detail of the smile molded on to the face. It seems normal when you first read it then when you realize its a doll, you understand the other meaning.

I'm a doll, by the way. I'm 37 years old. I belonged to Amelia's mother, then Amelia, and then the closet. I have a beautiful red dress, which covers some unpleasant stains, and I came with a kitchen set. I have a knife.

I love my knife.


Oh dear, now that's the sort of line that can send a few chills down your spine. A nice little description capped off with that chilling twist there.

Amelia walks out the door, humming a tune. I think it's Silent Night, one of my favorites. I see her car pull out of the driveway, and I smile in my head. I close my eyes.

I open them, and I'm in Amelia's car.


Oh no, that can't be the start of anything good. Poor Amelia.

I look outside, at the snow-covered trees. At the decorations. The red lights.

Amelia turns on the radio, and Elvis Presley comes on. They say he died of a heart attack. Makes you think...


Wow, this doll is an expert at being creepy.

We pull into the driveway after a little while, and Amelia gets out. I close my eyes.

I open them, and I'm in front of her. She screams and drops her purse. I grin in my head.

The knife comes out.

Sleep in heavenly peace...


Oh I love that ending, a lot more powerful that outright saying she was killed. Ahhh...this is just so powerful.

Aaaaand that's it for this one.

Overall: Overall this was a pretty cool story and it was a lot of fun to read. Until next time then. :)

As always remember to take what you think was helpful and forget the rest.

Stay Safe
Harry






Thanks for the really helpful review! :)



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Sat Dec 19, 2020 1:34 pm
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ImaginativeAlice wrote a review...



Alice think it was a very mysterious story. There was no clue what was going to come. I thought it would be all nice and pleasant but never knew the end was this.

"I open them, and I'm in Amelia's car."
"We pull into the driveway after a little while, and Amelia gets out. I close my eyes."

It was so unique that whenever she closed her eyes she get somewhere else. Because mostly in every story if the toy want to go somewhere they just hide somewhere in their thing like bag.


"I love my knife."

This made me think who like a knife and I mean why does a sweet doll wearing a beautiful red dress would like a knife.

You made this story perfectly creepy.
This is my best story including a doll.

Bye!






Thank you!



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Fri Dec 18, 2020 11:18 pm
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InuYosha wrote a review...



Oh goodness gracious.

Goodness gracious.

Goodness, goodness, gracious.

Momo, I have to say-- If I ever have nightmares from now on, it's going to be from that. You know how people describe some short stories as "Short and Sweet", well, I have a whole new category for you.

Short and Sinister.

There.

I'm a little too scared to review . . .

BUT I WANT TO

So.

Silent night...Holy night...

I wake up with a smile on my face. Granted, I always do. It's molded on my face, after all. I watch Amelia get dressed into an ugly blood-red Christmas sweater. She must be going to see those parents of hers. Of course, the it doesn't cross her mind to take me. It's fine; she's only human. I'll come anyway.


At this point, the reader doesn't see anything suspicious here. "It's molded on my face, after all." I love that line. Kind of like a foreshadowing of what's to come.

I'm a doll, by the way. I'm 37 years old. I belonged to Amelia's mother, then Amelia, and then the closet. I have a beautiful red dress, which covers some unpleasant stains, and I came with a kitchen set. I have a knife.

I love my knife.


Now, you introduce that the narrator is a doll. . . . AND you introduce that this doll loves knives.

Sweet.

Amelia walks out the door, humming a tune. I think it's Silent Night, one of my favorites.


. . . no suspicion here . . . Silent Night is one of the doll's favorite tunes . . . yay . . .

I close my eyes.

I open them, and I'm in Amelia's car.


Okay, now this starts to get a little weird. It's the only part of this story that seems to be really weird to me. I think it would have been more natural if the doll sneaked into Amelia's purse or something. Idk. But this . . . teleportation . . . really creeps me out AND really confuses me. I think a thinking doll is enough fantasy in my opinion for a story like this.

Amelia turns on the radio, and Elvis Presley comes on. They say he died of a heart attack. Makes you think...


Love this line. You know . . . it does make me think. Did Elvis have a doll? When did he die? Was it on Christmas?

Anyways, that's about all I have for this short story.

Its very Short and Sweet.

Oops, sorry, I meant Short and Sinister.

Well, Bon Voyage! I better go clean my closet if you get my gist . . .

-y0sH!






Thanks for the review!! :)




Life is like an onion. You peel it off one layer at a time, and sometimes you weep.
— Carl Sandburg