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E - Everyone

Be someone who makes you happy.

by BhavyaMehta123


Hello readers,

Today I am going to change my style a little bit. This is my own experience. I hope you enjoy it.

I am going to tell you about a 15 year old girl: Bhavya who thought that self- care meant being selfish. This girl feared giving opinions and expressing her likes. She felt living for others is right and rest is wrong. She lived for others but in a wrong way. She felt it was okay to be exploited, not to be respected and her fear of losing people was root of all this.She ignored herself, her likes and never loved herself. Whenever tough times came she would feel sad because no one was around and the peers she surrounded herself with were least bothered.

 In This way she learnt the biggest lesson of her life." Until you love yourself, you can't spread love." She started discovering herself and loving herself. She learnt to draw line between selfishness  and self care. She started to do things which made her feel happy and contented. She stopped fearing what others would think and feared less.She started to love herself and be true to her own self .She accepted her weaknesses and strengths. She invested in her growth and nourishment and came to a conclusion, " It is important to love yourself and do what makes you happy"

~Love yourself~


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19 Reviews


Points: 1477
Reviews: 19

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Wed Mar 25, 2020 11:57 pm
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StudentAH wrote a review...



Wow. I think this is incredible, Bhavya. There are mistakes here and there; I'm assuming English may not be your first language? In that case though it is completely fine because you brought your point across. And I could not agree more with the story.

I had a bit of confusion with the narrator calling the girl "selfish." It was because of self-preservation, right? But at the same time I wouldn't really call it 'selfish' because she's not purposefully exploiting others -- rather she is letting herself be exploited.

I still think the overall message of the short was really great. And the most powerful line in my opinion was this: "her fear of losing people was [the] root of all [of] this." That line was incredible.

The idea of selfish vs self-care is an interesting wordplay, but I just personally don't see the girl's actions as selfish.






Hi. Yes! I am not a native English speaker and mistakes happen. I am trying my level best to improve them. And I am thankful to you for understanding this. Actually, this is my own story which I have presented in this style. I thought that caring for yourself was equivalent to being selfish as I heard " Serve others". So thus I learnt the lesson that, " It is important to love yourself." I hope I could clear your confusion. If not feel free to ask me again. Thank you for all the appreciation .
From:Bhavya





Hi. Yes! I am not a native English speaker and mistakes happen. I am trying my level best to improve them. And I am thankful to you for understanding this. Actually, this is my own story which I have presented in this style. I thought that caring for yourself was equivalent to being selfish as I heard " Serve others". So thus I learnt the lesson that, " It is important to love yourself." I hope I could clear your confusion. If not feel free to ask me again. Thank you for all the appreciation .
From:Bhavya



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12 Reviews


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Tue Mar 24, 2020 10:24 pm
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PhoenixEmberly wrote a review...



Hey there, I just stopped by to say that I think the message behind this is very good! It's a lesson that I myself and many others need to grasp and realize, because it is absolutely true. The old saying that we cannot love others properly until we love ourselves is addressed in this text, and it is something that must be spread as much as possible. Bhavya's story is quite similar to some of the experiences many people have had. By keeping the specifics in the story to a minimum, it allowed for the reader to fill in the details with their own thoughts and feelings, making for a more personalized experience. I thought this as an excellent way to make it more appealing to a far wider range of people. It was simple, short, effective, and presented a beautiful and important message for all people to relate to and learn from. Well done.






Hi@ Phoenix Emberly. Welcome to YWS. I hope you have a great time here.Thank you so much for all the appreciation for my work. I am so glad that you loved the message and could relate from it. As a writer, I feel complete when my reader tells me that it was relatable. You indeed made my day.
From: Bhavya



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Points: 116
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Tue Mar 24, 2020 7:42 pm
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Hanuli wrote a review...



Hey Bhavya!

I liked how personal this piece was. I'm assuming that you're sharing your own experiences. Assuming that, I like the self-reflection that is in this piece of writing. Furthermore, I definitely agree - self-love and care are some of the more important aspects of life. If this is, in fact, your personal journey, then I'm very happy for you.

Some minor grammar stuff that I want to point out:

"Whenever tough times came she would feel sad because no one was around as the peers she surrounded herself with: were least bothered."

This could be better phrased as:

"Whenever tough times came she would feel sad because no one was around. The peers she surrounded herself with were least bothered."

In addition,

"And this way she learnt the biggest lesson of her life."

Could be:

"In this way she learnt the biggest lesson of her life."

I always try to reconsider starting a sentence or paragraph with "and".

There are some minor grammar errors with spaces before/after periods, which I won't point out individually.

Overall, I think that this is a great piece. Maybe the grammar could be polished a bit, but regardless of that, the writing is lovely and gets the point across.

Have a great day.
Lynn






Hi Lynn. Welcome to YWS. I hope you have a lovely time here.Yes, this is my own experience which I am sharing.I have edited the major mistakes and thank you for helping me make my work refined. Thank you so much for all the suggestions and appreciation.
From: Bhavya.




If you want to make enemies, try to change something.
— Woodrow Wilson