Rough, Uneven Edges
I’m not the fragile piece of femininity
that I paint myself to be.
I try to hide my rough, uneven edges
behind pastels, defined borders
and cute avatars that
will never really be me.
I wield lowercase letters
instead of capitalization.
I say it’s for “style”
but it’s really because
I’m afraid of showing my abnormalities.
I’m not an “aesthetic” or “beautiful”.
Trying to figure out
how to format things
was never my forte.
Left for regular,
center for when I ramble too long
and right when I want
to hide my imperfections.
I can’t tell stories of boys and girls
entwined in a beautiful twilight.
I can’t stomach romances, and
hate watching the dark, gritty stories
that are panned off as “original"
but are really the same tropes
painted with a little less light.
I’m the one who wrote who
sat down day after day
and wrote a self-insert novel
in seventh grade
about a demon king
and girl who just wanted a friend.
I’m a slew of crossover fanfictions
that will never see the light of the internet.
I’m the girl who taught her
childhood characters how to turn
magic into swords and guns
because I always loved
writing fights like the
ones in the animes
I watched growing up.
I’m countless stories
stitched together with the same
unfinished on paper,
but told completely in my head.