z

Young Writers Society


E - Everyone

Unlucky 13 - Chapter 11

by Lib


Finally, everyone had waken up. Grams’ eyes had snapped open when I told her the news. She had literally jumped up. I slowed her and told her that rushing her body wasn’t a great idea for her fragile body.

It took some time to wake up Ave, but begrudgingly, he woke up. Aunt Martha woke Tim and Uncle Sim who opened their eyes and got out of bed without a problem.

Izzy took a while because as soon as she woke up, she started crying. Last night, we had gotten a call saying that Rockette had been put down. She was in way too much pain because her irresponsible rider had kept her in the arena to do exercises to prepare for the competition when he knew that Rockette was lame.

The instructors had agreed that it was the best option. According to the rumors, that rider had fled from this city to go to some other city. Montreal I think, they said.

“You guys are supposed to be downstairs as soon as you’re ready.” I said to Ave and Izzy when they were in the doorway. Their rooms were right next to each other so that had made life seriously easier. I just called Ave’s name from the stairs and he woke up. That didn’t take much effort.

+++

I was sitting on the couch in the living room, all tensed up. I was still nervous. I started biting my nails. What if she hates me when she sees me and she leaves? Where is she going to stay? We’re leaving Quebec the day after tomorrow. I got up and started pacing around the room.

Tim came in. “Nervous, huh?”

“What if she doesn’t like me and she leaves again?” I asked. He sat down on the couch where I had been sitting.

Tim laughed. “You’re such a worry wart.” I noticed he was wearing the cap I had given him.

“Ha, you like the cap, huh?” I said, mimicking his “huh”. I swear I caught his cheeks turn slightly pink. He nodded.

“I don’t usually wear things that people give me, but I actually like the Bulls.” he admitted. I smiled at him. Uncle Sim, Ave, Grams, and Izzy came into the room and flopped onto the couch. I was the only one left standing.

“Ready?” Uncle Sim asked us. He was replied by nods from all over the room. “I’m going to see my sister. Mother is gonna see her daughter. The kids are gonna see their aunt. Julia, you’re going to meet your mother and Martha’s gonna see her sister-in-law!” he chuckled nervously. “Hope they get along…” he whispered as Aunt Martha came in.

We all laughed at the little joke and Aunt Martha looked at us, confused. “What?” she asked. She suddenly went pale, “Do I look bad?” she shrieked.

“No!” Ave smirked, “It was something else.”

“I’ll go start the car. I call driving.” Tim stood up and stretched his arms up in the air.

“Yoga class?” Izzy said softly. Tim playfully glared at her and smiled. He seemed to be getting less quiet and cool-big-boyish-dude-who-doesn’t-care-about-little-kids. He left and we all followed him.

“I’m so nervous.” Grams said to me, as she got up behind me, squeezing my hand.

“It’s fine. I bet everyone is.” I said. We got out of the house, Izzy locking the door. A car whizzed by and I saw an unlucky bird fly by and hit it. Ouch. Fourth bird.

“Can I choose the song?” Ave asked when we got in. Uncle Sim started driving. All the adults not including Tim, stayed quiet and listened to our useless bickering. Izzy grumbled and put her head on the car’s door.

Ave laughed, “You love this song,” he looked at Tim and whispered loud enough so everyone could make out what he had said. “When I’m gone.”

Izzy perked up and jumped to the edge of her seat. Tim took out the CD, leaned over to put it in, turned on the radio, put the correct track and turned it on. Ave laughed again. “Told you.” he said, sticking out his tongue.

“Whatever.” Izzy said, “You know I like this one, and that’s why you put it on.”

Ave folded his arms, and made a very convincing angry face, “Did not.”

“Did too.”

“Are you guys gonna listen or what?” Tim snapped.

I giggled. “I’m guessing you wanna listen, huh?” I asked. Tim grumbled and nodded. Bad mood boy ahead. Don’t want to mess with him today. Since we were kind of in the middle of the song, Izzy got up and tapped Tim on the shoulder asking him to start it from the beginning.

“Thanks!” she said, when Tim had done as asked.

“I got my ticket to the long way ‘round. Two bottles ‘a whiskey for the way.” Izzy, Ave and I started singing. Tim started humming. Aunt Martha and Grams started clapping when we were done. Uncle Sim started cheering – he couldn’t clap.

I must admit; we were pretty darn good. We might even one day become an amazing band! Tim will be the instrumental person and Ave, Izzy and I could be the singers with or audience – the adults!

In no time at all, we had reached the airport. My god, is this why I always see plane’s coming and going from where we live? We’re so close!

We all filed out of the van and headed into the airport. My stomach was churning. Butterflies took over. Not only butterflies, but horses, ladybugs, flies, elephants, all of them took over my stomach. I was going to puke. I held onto Grams and took baby steps to the airport entrance. “Grams.” I croaked.

“Julia.” I could basically hear both our hearts pounding in our chests. I took a deep breath. I can do it. She is my mother.

But she left me. Why though?

The voice in my head took control of my body, Julia! She loves you! Go to your mother. Run, Julia!

Heart pounding, I let go of Grams’ hand and ran into the airport and stood in the arrivals area.

Everyone else came rushing behind me.

I’m not feeling well. I suddenly felt very hot. I was getting sweaty. Is the heater seriously on in summer or is it just me?

My heart felt like it was going to burst out. My brain felt like shrinking and my stomach wanted to be let out. I didn’t let any of that happen because that’s when I saw her.

My mother.

Anthea Portman.

The woman who had left me with her own mother to take care of me. The woman who lived in a mansion but then lived in a cabin now because my father – her husband – died.

She looked just like me. If one had not known better, they would have thought we were siblings or maybe even twins.

Her green eyes sparkled when she saw me and she ran towards me, her wavy black hair, streaked with a bit of gray, flowing behind her. Her thin lips broke into a wide grin as she stopped in front of me. Her luggage was only a backpack that she was carrying behind her.

It was quite awkward. All of us were standing in one place and then there was that woman who had left me. Am I always going to call ‘The Woman Who Left Me’? Oh my gosh, I should stop.

I struggled to find words to say but there was no need. Mom’s eyes started to water, and tears threatened to spill out at any second.

She looked at Grams and hugged her. “My daughter has finally arrived.” Grams said, stroking Mom’s hair.

“Yes, Mother,” she smiled at Grams and then at me, “and I’m finally with my daughter.”

She held out her hands, welcoming me for a hug. I stood there for a few seconds, considering it. Ave nudged my foot from behind, making me stumble forwards into her arms.

Mom then looked at Uncle Sim, “My brother! How have you been?” she exclaimed, hugging Uncle Sim.

“Pretty good, kid.” he said, grinning at her when she pulled back.

“Kid?” Izzy asked, “Is he your father?” she asked. Everyone laughed.

A look of shock appeared on Izzy’s face. “That would mean you are,” she pointed at Mom, “my sister; and Julie is my niece!” she shrieked.

Laughing, Aunt Martha corrected her, “What we usually do is call the younger child kid if they are more than seven years younger.” she smiled at Izzy and Tim ruffled her hair.

“Oh.” Izzy said then laughed. “I get it now!”

“Weirdo.” Ave said, wrinkling his nose.

“Let’s go home, now shall we?” Aunt Martha said.

We all nodded and followed Tim into the car. Thank goodness the car was an eight-seater. All of us could fit in perfectly. One more person and we would’ve been arrested.

“We can bring the neighborhood over for a party. We won’t tell them about anything though. We’ll just say it’s a casual party.” Aunt Martha suddenly said, while we almost arrived.

Mom’s eyes widened. “No. No no no.” she shook her head from beside me.

I looked at her, “Why?”

“It’s too dangerous.” she explained, “I caught someone following me.” she whispered.

“Who was it?” Ave asked, looking back from the middle seats. Tim – who was right next to Ave – looked back too.

“I don’t exactly know. She had black hair, black eyes, she looked around seventeen or so.” Mom said. Me, Ave, and Tim gaped.

I could recognize that description anywhere. “Raven Hill.” I said.


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Tue Dec 03, 2019 6:15 pm
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crazybanana505 wrote a review...



Hello Liberty This chapter was amazing I loved how she thought her mother wouldn't like her but then she knew that her mother was thrilled to see her. Also it went from a happy chapter to a not so much happy chapter anymore which i did like that because when you make the reader think its happy then you make the reader get a little bit more serious which is good for mixed feelings. Your also doing such a great job with the unlucky chapter 13 book and I cant wait to read the next chapter because i really like this story. I wonder what will happen next will their cousins house explode or will the plane crash almost going into a volcano or will her mother leave in the morning without her if so that would not be so happy it would just be sad and why would she leave in the morning without her I don't know anyone who would do that.




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Tue Jul 16, 2019 11:21 pm
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EternalRain wrote a review...



Dang it! We never got to see the epic pool-trampoline-play structure backyard D: Maybe when they get home? I was really looking forward to that hehe.

But anyway, yay! Julia and her mother reunited. Julia's nervous scene really struck a cord with me - I feel like I would be incredibly nervous, too, in a situation like this. I think that was really nicely done. I think the scene right before they hugged was a bit looks-related and I would have loved to get inside Julia's head a bit more - I mean, like, she's probably thinking "What do I do? Do I smile? Do I hug her? AHhhhhhh!". But I did love it nonetheless, it was really sweet. It seems like they'll be on good terms.

(Although it is kind of weird how Julia is calling her "Mom" and not Anthea. I mean, "Mom" probably wouldn't feel right because her mom hasn't been in her life, like, at all. Kind of similar to how I wouldn't call a stepmother "Mom" if that makes sense. Although maybe after a bit she'll get warmed up to it).

Okay, so there was an irresponsible rider who fled??? Seriously?? Ugh, that makes me even more mad. I wonder if they will ever be found?

Ugh, Raven again. This chick is really weird lol. I wonder why she's following her MOTHER??? Geez. Super creepy. I'm curious how her mother thought she was dangerous? Like did Raven look super intimidating/scary? Also I love how Julia can recognize "black hair, black eyes" as Raven lollol, there's a lot of girls like that hehe :p Anyway, I am beyond pumped to learn more about Raven's revenge mission and her mother. That woman sounds creepy.

The car scene with Izzy was super cute. I'm happy she's kinda maybe feeling better?

I gotta know what's in this backyard.

Hope this helps out! Peace! <3

~ EternalRain




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Mon Jul 15, 2019 7:43 pm
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JabberHut wrote a review...



Hellooooo! ASAP HAS ARRIVED!

WAIT WHAT'S IN THEIR BACKYAAAAAARD

I don't think Grams is fragile. I feel like she's been walking and scurrying everywhere and seems just entirely spunky that she could totally just wake up and be like LET'S GO.

I find it REALLY WEIRD that Julia just knows how everyone wakes up. Was she with Aunt Martha when she woke Tim and Uncle Sim up?!

Izzy is STILL crying. I definitely reiterate the need to mention Rockette earlier in the story. //nods I WANT TO CRY FOR ROCKETTE TOO.

WAIT. WHAT.

Is Izzy the irresponsible rider? Or is Izzy just in love with another rider's horse? And POOR ROCKETTE. Being worked so hard that she was too injured and sick to live any longer. I'm REALLY HOPING IT WASN'T IZZY. A ten-year-old hearing that would just turn full-on depressed and have serious self-esteem issues.

Though if the rider was someone else, that could make a lot of sense for Izzy ALWAYS watching Rockette or something. Rockette is ALWAYS out jumping or running with her rider so Izzy ALWAYS gets to watch Rockette. This could be a subtle hint to indicate Rockette is being worked hard. I kinda like that turnout.

WHAT.

Okay hold on.

Okay I spoke too soon. So the rider... were they always Rockette's rider? And then when Rockette died, the rider ran off?! I wonder if the rider is depressed and ashamed. And it seems a bit soon to say that the rider fled Quebec. They could just say they got away and investigations are still ongoing. Quebec is pretty biiig.

WHO IS JULIA YELLING AT.

Julia seems rather authoritative all of a sudden, demanding Grams to "continue" and telling whoever to "be downstairs ASAP." I always thought her to be more of a free spirit, not one to be giving orders around like that. Just a new aspect to her character I wasn't ready for. I thought I knew her already, but I clearly don't!

TIM BLUSHED ?? That's adorable for an eighteen-year-old boy to BLUSH. AT A THIRTEEN-YEAR-OLD COUSIN. FOR A HAT. I didn't think Tim was so shy. I thought he was just not interested in others. But this makes him seem shy and that's completely different!

It's adorable that a Canadian likes the U.S. professional basketball league or whatever. Like, you'd think they'd just be interested in hockey, BUT TIM IS NO ORDINARY CANADIAN. U.S. BASKETBALL IS WHERE IT'S AT. GO BULLS!

LOL uncle sim omg.

Oooooh I like the narration addresses Tim's character change. What I would like it to say, though, is that Tim is opening up or something. Because Tim and Izzy are siblings and probably tease each other a lot. It would be adorable to see Tim mess her hair a bit on the way out since he's the big brother and all. He's clearly much more caring than he appeared, and this adorable little interaction tells us SO MUCH about Tim, who was such an anomaly for so long. Also, I say 'opening up' because no one goes through that kind of stark character change so quickly and nothing specific happened that would cause Tim to change his way of thinking at all. So this is more like he had his guard up as a teenager and is currently just confused about what's going ot happen with Anthea. Perhaps excited even.

LOL THE FOURTH BIRD. YOU'RE DOING THE THING AND I'M SO EXCITED.

Okay, Izzy had an INSANE mood swing here. I think I like the idea of her cheering up at the sound of a song she loves rather than she just getting squealy and stuff. Keep in mind that she has been crying for over twelve hours now, she even cried this morning. Her eyes are puffy and tired. She probably would have fallen asleep in the car until Avery turns on her favorite song and she perks up a little and starts singing a long and by the end of the song, her mind is distracted from Rockette and enjoying the jam session with her siblings and cousin.

It feels weird still that Tim would like... do the cup thing for this song (I LOVE THIS SONG BTW OMG). I feel like the other three would. I can picture them in the way back of the van and pretending to have cups and doing it together while singing, you know? And Tim is just bobbing his head, humming or even mouthing the words or singing softly so no one hears. OR MAYBE HE DRUMS A BIT ON HIS LAP. THAT'D BE TOTALLY A TEENAGE-BOY THING TO DO. omg drummers, man.

THERE'S A ZOO IN HER STOMACH. That can't be healthy.

I feel like Grams shouldnt' be as nervous as Julia since Grams and Anthea have apparently been in touch? Like Grams has had time to ready herself for this meeting, but this was flung onto Julia last minute.

When did she lose her parents again--A YEAR AGO. I remembered.

It's almost sad to think that the entire family came to see Anthea, but they didn't all come to greet Grams and Julia IS THERE ENOUGH SPACE IN THE VAN FOR ONE MORE PERSON OH NO.

In fact, have never met Anthea before. I'm not so sure they'd be as ecstatic if they don't even know the person. Probably incredibly awkward as everyone else celebrates, then they'd proceed to be happy for Julia or their dad and grandma. Aunt Martha certainly hasn't met her before, so she'd only be friendly and greet her as a hostess for now. That leaves Uncle Simon, Grams, and Julia to rejoice in her arrival. The others don't know Anthea.

TIM RUFFLED HER HAIR YEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEES

It would have been ADORABLE if Tim called her kid as he explained it to her, rather than Aunt Martha explaining it. It would have been SO GOOD.

YAY THE VAN HAS EIGHT SEATS.

WEIRD. SHE CALLS HER MOM NOW. But I like it. I LIKE IT.

I feel like EVERYONE would be a bit stiff after hearing Raven's description. Uncle Simon even didn't like her and warned them all not to get involved with her.

WHY IS RAVEN HILL FOLLOWING HER. Like, is she following from the gate? She wasn't on the plane. How did she get to the gate? I think people have to meet up with arrivals later, like for baggage claim and stuff? Granted, I don't know how Canada airports work. I'm just curious how long Raven has been following her and how Anthea knows this is the case.

BUT IT'S AN INTERESTING DEVELOPMENT. WHAT IS RAVEN DOING HERE. GO AWAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAY




Lib says...


Lol. Thanks for the review! It all helped, and I will be making improvements. I'm guessing you know more about teenage boys then I do. XD



JabberHut says...


Bahahaha, I've had my experience with them! But as long as your character has likes, dislikes, habits, behaviors, strengths, and weaknesses, stereotypes no longer matter. :D



Lib says...


Alright. I'll take the tip.



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Mon Jul 15, 2019 6:14 am
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Awru wrote a review...



Hallu!At your service madame.Lets begin i totally loved this chapter.You r improving so rapidly.There was a lot of emotion in this chapter which had been lacking previously so that felt seriously good.The reunion of Julia and her mom was so emotional and happy.OMG!!I just love your plot twists especially in the previous chapter.It leaves the reader absolutely shocked out of the blue which makes the story really interesting.The light hearted humour spices everything so well.I am glad at least half of Julias problems are over.Lifes been hard onher.Now for the remaining important character feels:

Izzy

:
I just adore this adorable 10 year old.She has got her own sassy swag.And she isalso pretty sensitive and sweet.Her personality is a mixture of childishness and maturity.Sometimes she acts like a toddler and at ithers wise old izzy which just doubles her cool.

Tim

:
Everyone deserves a cousin or big brother like this guy.He is sweet at times and is always supporting towards his little sisters.
smiled at Izzy and Tim ruffled her hair.

Omg!i loved this adorable gesture.He can be pretty affectionate too.I am glad your bringing out his cool boyish dude tendencies as you put it

raven hill


The evil antagonist.Damn this girl is dangerous.She seriously freaks me out like crazy and her name r
Raven just completes the whole big baddie profile.I mean she doesnt even leave the adults alone.I am dying to know why she is so jealous of JuliaYou didn't revealed this in the previous chap u SNEAK
But i know this is probably going to be revealed in the last chaps.She makes Maddie look like a sweet,kind and considerate girl

So called friends


I believe there are going to be some serious confrontations once she returns and am so sad she is going back.I am going to miss this awesome family sooo much.You made me fall in love with all of them and now i don't want to let go*sobs*
You doing a well done job on Unlucky 13.Dang its such a COOL title

Now for someother mistakes:
to prepare for the competition when he knew that Rockette was lame.
Thats fine too but i think it would be better if it was even though Rockette was lame(the poor horse)
What if she hates me when she sees me and she leaves?
Remove the second she
Hope they get along…” he whispered as Aunt Martha came in.

Hehehehe
Other then Alls Good
Keep Up the Excellent Work and Awesome humour there :smt023


peace out




Lib says...


Thanks so much for the review and all those kind words! our review helps a lot. :) <3



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Sun Jul 14, 2019 10:13 pm
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Horisun wrote a review...



Yay, new chapter!
This one was really good! I loved it! I do wish there was a little more explanation from the Mom, and more focus on the reunion aspect, and perhaps some awkwardness. Less focus on Izzys joke, maybe? I felt it took away from everything else, which needed to be the main event, as it's something that's been building up for the last few chapters.
Also, in the very first line, maybe replace one of the "body"'s with a different word, as it will be easier to read.
Also, RAVEN? WAAAAAAAAAATTTTT? She's popping up everywhere! (Also, I think it was Raven who caused the loss of Rockett. I'm positive. I mean, Rocketts death has to connect back to the story somehow, right?
One thing I absolutely cannot wait for is when Julia confronts her two best friends. I have a feeling that'll happen closer to the end, but I really hope that when it does happen, you do something great with it! (Who am I kidding, I'd bet my cookie that your going to do it justice!(Cookies are the best thing ever))
Overall, amazing chapter! You've improved so much since the start of this story! It just keeps on getting better, and better, and I can't wait to read the next chapter! Have a great day!




Lib says...


Thank you so much for the review!!! And, my god, girl, you're on a roll... Raven may have something related to Rockette. HOW DID YOU FIND OUT.

Thanks anyways for the review!



Horisun says...


Well, if you really want to know, it all started before I was born. My Mother lost her old photos, she searched day and night, in old crates, and even online! She checked in the closet, under the stairs, in old bins, and the attic, but no sign of it. So, desperate to find the photos, she asked an old friends brother to help find the photos, because he was a pirate, and they're good at finding things. He became a pirate long before they ever met, when he was just a boy, he found a mermaid washed up on the beach. She was unconscious, so to see if he could help her, he lifted her up. Then, her tail turned into a pair of legs! The Sea God was impressed by his kindness, so he told him that if he promised to love, and care for the ocean, he would let the young pirate have one wish. They young pirate was wise, and he waited to use this wish. Fast forward a bit, the pirate agreed to help my Mother in her search for the photos. They searched high, and low, on sea, and on land, when the Pirate found a map to a place known as, "Where the Lost Things Go" It would be a long, and terrible journey, and they might die, but using there wits and brown belts in karate, they pushed back every monster they faced, including one called Finn. Finn was gravely injured, but with his dying breath, he told the great sea god about what the pirate had done to him. Angry, the Sea God cursed their voyage, and right when the island of "Where the Lost Things Go" was in view, a giant storm tore apart there boat, and stranded my Mother and the Pirate on two separate islands. It was only when they were away from each other, they realized they had feeling for one another. So, using there shared love, they opened a portal to Where the Lost Things Go. They were overjoyed, but before they could confess, the Sea God found out, and he was angry that they'd hurt Finn, so he kidnapped the Pirate, and told my Mother that if she didn't give him the photos by the third day, he would feed the Pirate to the sharks. My Mother was angry, and wanted to round house kick the Sea God to Pluto, but the Pirate told her not to, and that it was his fault. With that they disappeared under the sea, and left my Mother alone. She instantly began her search, finally, after scanning the whole island, she found a cave with even more stuff in it. But it was guarding but an evil snake, who feasted on lonely travelers. It tried to eat her, but my Mother was clever, she dodged the snakes attacks, and made it tie itself up. My Mother began her search once again, and found the photos. That's when the snake began to speak, it said, "His wish will be to make amends, when the fifth is born, he'll have fins, when he's of age, he'll shed his skins, and accept the flippers."
Shocked, my Mother ran out of the cave, but not before she was bitten by the snake. she quickly summoned the Sea God, and though she ached to do so, she gave the Sea God the photos, and the Pirate was free. He told her that he wished to make amends. Shocked, My Mother told the Pirate about the snakes prophecy. The Pirate was shocked as well. But they decided to forget about it for now, as they needed to get back to land. When they got back, they kept the story a secret. The Pirate gave up the pirate life, and got married to my Mother, they had two kids, and lived happily ever after. The only reason I know this story, is because when my Mother was bitten by the snake, some of its magic got transferred to her, and then got transferred to me, so now I can see the future, I have a cousin named Finn, who is the fifth youngest, and we've now moved back to the ocean, though my Dad is still reluctant to go to the ocean.
Now you may be asking, how did I find out? Because I can see the future. Duh. :D



Horisun says...


Does that answer your question?



Horisun says...


(Finns not his real name, we just call him that)



Awru says...


@Horisun I almost died laughing%uD83D%uDE02%uD83D%uDE02%uD83D%uDE02%uD83D%uDE02%uD83D%uDE02%uD83D%uDE02%uD83D%uDE02



Lib says...


@Awru, same! XD
@Horisun, yeah, I guess it does. XP



JabberHut says...


Horisun, that was so beautiful I WANT TO DRAW FANART BUT I CANNOT DRAW ???



Horisun says...


xD



Horisun says...


I had so much fun writing it, Lol.




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