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It Doesn't Hurt me Anymore

by brookeallo


It Doesn't Hurt me Anymore

A few months have gone by now,

I haven't seen your face around.

That is until today.

Just a few days after the ending of May.

I could tell that it was you,

which left me pondering on what to do.

Enough time had gone by,

that I had slowly forgotten the part of you to me that had died.

I'm glad I saw you from behind,

so your eyes didn't have the chance to make me go blind. 

I stood for a second,

just wondering I reckon. 

Then I walked past you,

not daring to look back cause I knew.

For if I dared,

you would give that look that we both shared.

I have to admit,

that I held my wit.

It might have not been easy for me to have walked away,

that day.

but in doing so and staying alert,

I managed to save myself from all of the hurt. 


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User avatar


Points: 25
Reviews: 4

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Wed Jun 12, 2019 4:40 am
Uni wrote a review...



Hey there! Uni here for a review.
How are you doing? Hope you are fine.
Sorry for not reviewing this earlier!

I'm so excited to be back and start reviewing your poem! Hope you're doing well today or tonight, depending on what side of the world you're on.
Not a very long poem but deep emotions, I must say. I can relate to the poem very well. And I know most of us can relate to the words and feelings you have put in this literary work.
So let us start.
First of all, I have to say you are an amazing poet. Each word struck just the right cord in my heart. I have felt the feelings you have described so beautifully. And I loved the way you presented them. Ten stars for presentation.
Making a poem rhyme at the same time saying everything you want to say is a bit difficult. But not impossible.
Great rhyming scheme, I must say.

'Enough time had gone by,

that I had slowly forgotten the part of you to me that had died.

I'm glad I saw you from behind,

so your eyes didn't have the chance to make me go blind. '

I liked these lines because they have such a beautiful meaning. Easily relatable lines. You write so amazingly that I can actually feel it is happening with me, which at this time, is not.

'I have to admit,

that I held my wit.'

I liked the expression in the above mentioned lines. Such short sentences but I could feel the emotions.

'It might have not been easy for me to have walked away,

that day.'

Here, maybe you can fix the sentences a little bit. Just an advice. Again, That's me. You do whatever you like.

Also, make the first letters bold and overall polish and re-edit the poem. That would be enough.
I liked the theme. And I hope you'll post more of your poems.
Have a good day. Keep writing.



Random avatar
brookeallo says...


Thanks for the review!!!%uD83D%uDE03



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10 Reviews


Points: 50
Reviews: 10

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Tue Jun 11, 2019 11:31 am
anu says...



Waiting for more.



Random avatar
brookeallo says...


Thanks im om vacation lol so i havent had time to post but I will soon!!!%uD83D%uDE0A%uD83D%uDE0A%uD83D%uDE0A



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10 Reviews


Points: 50
Reviews: 10

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Tue Jun 11, 2019 11:21 am
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anu says...



I liked your writing style. The way the stanzas are.
I must say the poem is very relatable . But in my case , its hard to forget people as they keep walking past me .Lol!
No wonder once forgotten ,they don't hurt anymore.
Keep writing!All the best.



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brookeallo says...


Thankyou so much for reading!!!%uD83D%uDE0A



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113 Reviews


Points: 5242
Reviews: 113

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Fri Jun 07, 2019 12:21 am
xJade wrote a review...



Wesh! I'm Professor Jade and I'm just going to give this a quick review. Let's just go!

This paints a clear picture in my head. It's pretty relatable and hard-hitting. Just go through and check the flow, word choice, and just overall polish it up. Maybe add stanzas and the bold words at the top is unneeded so I don't know if that's an artistic statement or just telling us.

Anyways, sorry this is vague and quick, I'm on a time crunch. I hope this helped :D!

-Professor JadeLotus



Random avatar
brookeallo says...


Thankyou for reading and the bold words at the top are just the title lol.



xJade says...


I guessed that, lol! But I was just sating it was unneeded, but your choice :) Glad I could help



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110 Reviews


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Reviews: 110

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Tue Jun 04, 2019 3:36 pm
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FabihaNeera wrote a review...



Hello,

This is a really nicely written poem! I like the idea you were conveying here, it was done really well. I could feel emotion from this that a lot of us can relate to. The rhymes are well done too, each line flowed really smoothly to the next. From beginning to end, you stuck with a nice and sad story, and the title fits in really well too.

Keep Writing. :)



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brookeallo says...


Thanks for the review !!! :)



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425 Reviews


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Reviews: 425

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Tue Jun 04, 2019 10:19 am
FlamingPhoenix wrote a review...



Hello FlaingPhoenix here with a few things to say about your poem, and to help get it out the green room.

Okay let's begin.

So I thought this poem was written really, really well. And I couldn't see a single thing wrong with it, I thought all the punctuation was in the right place giving it the perfect flow, and it helped carry all the emotion over to your reader.
Talking of emotion I though you did that really well, you used just the right words to give it an affect. And I felt sad and re-leaved with the poem, and I could feel all the hurt. It was just really well done, and I don't think I could have done it any better.
I also just love the story you are telling us, it's so sad, and yet most people can relate to it. I no I can in some way.

Over all this was really well written, and I'm really glad I had the chance to read and review this work. I do hope you will post again sometime on YWS. I hope you have a great day or night.

Your friend
FlamingPhoenix.
Reviewing with a fiery passion.



Random avatar
brookeallo says...


Thankyou so much for the review !!! :)





Your welcome!




A cynic is a man who knows the price of everything, and the value of nothing.
— Oscar Wilde