z

Young Writers Society


E - Everyone

Find Yourself

by fatherfig


Find yourself in the music,

if you get lost you get lost with me,

find the rhythm never lose it,

be happy be free,

cause the rhythms inside,

it can't hide,

just dance dance away,

some good things can stay,

play it on the radio,

find yourself losing yourself in a song you know,

Find yourself in the music,

if you get lost you get lost with me,

find the rhythm never lose it,

be happy be free,

Find yourself in the music,

if you get lost you get lost with me,

find the rhythm never lose it,

be happy be free,

it'll be like you were never lost at all,

don't be afraid to stand tall,

it'll be like you were never lost at all. 


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103 Reviews


Points: 97
Reviews: 103

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Sun Mar 31, 2019 12:31 am
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Samhain wrote a review...



In the world of YWS, this inspirational poem is a rare find, given that most poetry/lyrical works found on the site are about the dramatic and darker side of life (which I have nothing against, mind you). And what I like about this poem/song here is that you take one idea (music) and expand on it, using the "losing yourself in music" idea as a way to provide a person with troubles a sort of solution to their difficulty. Yet at the same time it is also reminiscent of a love song, where the narrator and whoever the narrator is talking to can both get lost together, the word "lost" no longer being a feeling to shy away from, but something to look forward to. Altogether a really interesting piece. You did a good job.
In the line "be happy be free" you could possibly add a comma after "happy".




fatherfig says...


Thank you. I never got a notification for this, but I am glad I am seeing it now.



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140 Reviews


Points: 249
Reviews: 140

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Sun Mar 31, 2019 12:13 am
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Anma wrote a review...



Hello @269609

This is amazing!

I can't really say anything bad about this its just all good.

One thing I may suggest though is don't use to many comas.
Using other punctuation would make it look way better.
(But that's your choice)

I can totally see this as a actual song that people would listen to.
I can sing it in my head which is kind of strange, but its a good thing.

I hope to read more work like this from you!

Sincerely Anma




fatherfig says...


Thank you. I never got a notification for this, but I am glad I am seeing it now.



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45 Reviews


Points: 0
Reviews: 45

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Wed Mar 20, 2019 6:01 pm
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potatoefry2001 says...



Oh my gosh!!! I'm so happy I gave you my points!!! You used them for something amazing and useful.




fatherfig says...


Thank you and I will try to return the favor.





you didn't have to, but thank you SO much.



fatherfig says...


yourwelcome




Poetry lies its way to the truth.
— John Ciardi