Young Writers Society

Hello Ruby68!!

Liberty500 is dropping in a review!

First:

I really love how you used the word "invested". You did a really great job writing the entire poem!

Second:

In this line: "I stele myself and promise to stay away". The "stele" needs to be "steel".

Third:

Again, this was a magnificent poem, I especially loved your title, "The Waiting".

Keep on writing!

~Liberty500

Hi, Shikora here with a review.
So let's begin.

I really liked the name you have chosen for this poem, it was very interesting and I came to read the poem to find out what it meant.
It was nice to have long poem to read, and it was filled with so much emotion, so great job.
I think the words you have chose is really good, they just go really well together.

Put there were a few things I saw that needed to be fixed.

So the first thing I saw was that you say I a lot in your poem. If it is possible it would be nice if you could change them to something else like me or something, but if you can't then don't worry,

the next thing I was saw that you don't have any punctuation in your poem, It did affect the flow of the poem, and the way we were meant to read it. So I'm going to show you a place you could have put comma or something like that.

I told myself I wasn’t invested

I stele myself and promise to stay away

This poem is so perfect. I think anyone who has ever been through love, over love, and back to love again can relate.

We all tell ourselves we have grown, we aren't as invested as last time, so we won't get as hurt as last time, but all love is new.

Anyway, the only real criticism I have is that in the 5th line from the bottom stele should be steel.

Thanks for sharing! Keep writing! ^-^