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Alone

by Bellarke


                             Alone

I am alone

The tears shown

You don't care

It isn't fair

Why do I stay

But I cant run away

What is this Pain

I am a Disdain

Holding in my Anger

If let it out, you are in Danger

I stand alone...

I am now unknown...


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18 Reviews


Points: 607
Reviews: 18

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Thu Nov 08, 2018 6:25 pm
carlak2003 wrote a review...



Hi there Carla here for a review.
This poem is so short but yet has so many emotions to it.
I really like the layout of this poem, it is different but quite funky, I like it.
I really like the rhyming scheme, it fit wells with the title of the poem.
I really like the ending
"I am now unknown" so many people feel this emotion and are afraid to tell someone about it.
I also like how the last 2 lines have the ... after them to show the reader that either the writer hasn't finished his sentence or that he/she is hesitant
If you disagree with any of this please comment
Over and out.




Bellarke says...


Thank you!!



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303 Reviews


Points: 16630
Reviews: 303

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Thu Nov 08, 2018 8:58 am
FlamingPhoenix says...



Wow this was just a lovely poem. It's one of your best so far. I look forward to reading more.




Bellarke says...


Thank you! You have been with me through them all!!





Your welcome.





Your welcome.



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24 Reviews


Points: 2047
Reviews: 24

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Wed Nov 07, 2018 10:50 pm
RowenaLynn wrote a review...



Hello! This is really cool! I always feel that rhyming is cool in poetry when it's done right (and you did it well-Just be careful about that in the future:)). I love that it makes sense to people and doesn't leave room for confusion. The capitalization throughout helps emphasize the specific words and I really liked that. Thank you for writing! Keep at it!




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155 Reviews


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Reviews: 155

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Wed Nov 07, 2018 8:27 pm
FireSpyGirl wrote a review...



This is really good!
I love the depth, the feeling, the pain. You expressed it really well. What I also love about this poem is that everyone can understand it, it speaks to everyone. At some point in their lives, everyone feels this.

My favorite part is the very beginning: "I am alone, The tears shown, You don't care."

Keep up the amazing work!




Bellarke says...


Thank you....




Get ready to laugh: because my main critique is that you need to put a meter on this.
— Lumi