Young Writers Society

This is a beautiful poem, and as I've said in past reviews, I love that it focuses on an emotion and on a single scene instead of an overarching plot whose story it tells. I'm a sucker for these types of poems.

I couldn't tell if this was written in a meter or not. Some parts seemed like they were, and some parts seemed like they weren't. That confused me a bit and took my attention from the beauty of the poem.

The stanza on fear was powerful, but I feel like you could've played around with some different punctuation choices and line divisions to see what would've been the most effective, because I know for me it was missing just a little something.

On a more positive note, your imagery was absolutely beautiful and I loved how you used the repetition of the word "Endure!" Also, how the narrator comes to the conclusion in the last line that "I must have sinned." That one, succinct line contrasted with the flowing imagery and length of the rest of the poem really hits home. Bravo!

Hiya!

Temptress here to give a review!

So, first of all I'd just like to say I found your poem very interesting and I really enjoyed it.

Now on to the review.

Like the first person who reviewed this poem said, the imagery you used was very well chosen. Also, I thought the use of repetition of the word "Endure" was a very well chosen way to write this. As well as the last person, I do like how you did a theme of sorts as living through life with nothing but fear as an emotion and the sin you have committed.

I'm so sorry that this review is so much like the first. Anyways I did really enjoy this work of art.

Until next time!

~Temptress~

Legacy here for a review.

I love the imagery that you used in this work. I love how you describe going through life with fear as your only emotion and how your suffering is because of whatever sin you must have committed. I don't see any grammatical issues with this either, although some of your vocabulary most people wouldn't know without grabbing a dictionary so keep that in mind. The imagery of this poem really brings it to life, and I think with less imagery, this work would not be as strong. I wish I could tell you something to improve this work, but I don't personally think it is possible. Good Job. Keep writing. Legacy out.