btw I caused this
I made her poem rant
I want to scream.
I want to yell,
make my lungs burn.
---
I am shaking,
I feel like I am about to break,
A tree in a lightning storm.
---
I want to cry,
But people are here, in
The room across from mine --
The one below.
---
I am shaking.
The keys are hardly clacking --
Instead, they are being smashed.
---
I need a hug:
I need a person to tell me things will be okay.
I need a person who will help me,
A friend who won't turn their back.
I need a friend who I can be myself around.
I feel so alone.
A tree in the
middle of the desert.
---
It's so cold here, at night.
Here in the desert,
Beasts roam free.
I have many that stalk me.
---
I want to scream.
I want to have my throat feel like knives are
slicing it apart,
Destroying my means of talking.
---
I want to cry,
I want to cry until my eyes are bleeding.
Oh, how I wish I could cry my worries away.
---
I feel like that I am freaking out
For no reason.
---
Stay calm stay calm
staycalmstaycalmstaycalm
---
Maybe I am calm.
For now.
AN// Thank you @DemonGoddess for helping me with my grammar on this poem and with a line or two!!!
Hello! You've done a good job with this poem. Capturing emotions is difficult, much less getting others to relate to those emotions. I certainly related to this poem. I think it hits everyone a different way, because most everyone has been in the place this poem was written in, mentally, of course.
One thing I would suggest changing is in the sixth stanza, the last line seems awkward (as everything usually does to my awkward brain). I would suggest cutting it, unless it holds super emotional value.
Overall, I enjoyed reading this poem. I connected with it, and I think you've done a good job at portraying an emotion.
Overall, I think you did a very good job. Your poem hit me on a personal note, for I sometimes feel that I have no one in my life to comfort me.
I think the way you formated your lines and stanzas really made the poem flow well.
I also loved how you used bolds and italics to shape your poem. That gave it more depth.
OMG!!!!!!!!!! IT'S OK!!!!!!!! I AM HERE FOR YOUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU!!!!!! Don't forget that bud. I know Grim may not help you at times, or maybe even at all, but I can help you! I promise you! You may not believe me, but that is perfectly fine, I will still help you.
*Backs away from computer*
Uh....
*Goes back to computer*
Never mind, I know you believe me, forget anything about you not believing me that I would help you.
*Pollution walks in and rolls her eyes*
@Dreamworx95 @DemonGoddess @woahhitherepal @WhosabellCanWrite @TheBlueCat @LittleLee @269609 @Lake
Here you guys. This is basically a mash up of all of my poems. Credit to DG for a few of the lines and some grammar fixes!
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yo welcome
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