Young Writers Society

Hi there friend, I completely agree with the message this story conveys. It is relatable and truthful. Since the beginning of time the new generation sucks the past one was the best end of story. People never stop and think that the past wasn’t as perfect as it was to them. AKA the youtube comment section. However, this is not about annoying people this is about you. Your descriptions make it seem like the character and I are having a conversation. Keep doing that! It always good to include and relate to the reader. That is one of the benefits of short stories. However, your grammar needs work. Typos and mistakes are very common and plague all writers, so don’t feel bad. The first letter in a sentence has to be capitalized. Always. I also feel like maybe you should connect your sentences. Each because can connect a sentence. I know you want to avoid run on sentences, but try making your sentences a little longer. All and all great story and I think you would enjoy the book The Great Gatsby. It’s one of my favorites. Keep writing!

Hey there, Eli here for a birthday rush!

I want to say beforehand that this review will be mostly edits as I am very strict with my commas, you do not need to take the edits so deep to heart and feel guilty for not putting them into your work, so let's go!

Firts of all, what is the work really? It is marked as general and I understand why but I think it is more than that even if I am not fully sure what it is really exactly. Maybe a talk with yourself of how you regret how you current life is? Or maybe a message to the readers, a short walk down memories? It goes throught a sad story of many people, it is pretty realistic, you could point it out as one. Maybe spiritual. It helps the readers realize somethings about the world they live in. The story on its own is great but we have hard time understanding what you want to tell even if in the end, it is obviously about our future and how we should look only at the front, not behind our backs.

when I was younger, I used to think that being older was going to be amazing and fun. I used to believe that life was easy.

Like with each memory that pops up, I become more distracted from reality and destroyed.

I guess it,s just a common thing everyone long for as we grow up.

This is Nikayla here dropping in for a review!

I have to stay that I'm a little unsure as to what this is. A prose poem? A thought without a plot? I sort of made that last term up, though this doesn't seem to be a short story because there's no actual story here and this is listed as 'Other' instead of 'Poetry' so it's probably not that either. That's why I'm going to treat this as a 'thought without a plot' because that's the best way I can describe this.

With that being said, I gotta say that this possesses a philosophical tone almost though the actual theme of 'don't look back, move forward' is a little standard. There are grammar errors here, and I just wanted to point a couple of them out. In the last two paragraphs, neither of the first sentences are capitalized. The first sentence of the second paragraph also isn't capitalized. The lack of capitalization at points isn't the only grammar issue here.

so look forward and don't look back. Because being stuck in the past is sometimes what destroys is the most

Bonjour, bvbAngel.

I feel as if with each step I take I fall apart even more. LikeWith each memory that pops up I become more distracted from reality and destroyed. I miss how things once were—how life used to be. I miss everyone from my past, and how they once acted. I guess it's just a common thing everyone longs for as wethey grow up.

When I was younger, I used to think that being older was going to be amazing and fun. I used to believe that life was easy.

But as I grew up, each year that cameeach year came and passed, I realized more and more if what a hell life really is—how painful it is. There was a time thatwhen I didn't know why people fell apart, took their own life, self harmed, or became addicted to something to erase the pain.

I wish I still didn't know why people would do these things, but the past is the past and time don't rewind.

Life is probably the toughest thing we will ever have to go through, but we will have to stay strong no matter what happened to us in the past. The past hurts. Everytime I think of the past it really destroys me. There should be a space between "every" and "time".

so lLook forward and don't look back because being stuck in the past is sometimes what destroys isus the most.

happiness as a child
depression as a teenager

I relate to this..thank you for posting. I've fallen apart, self harmed, became addicted to things that numb my pain, and have attempted multiple times to take my life. don't give in, yourself.

Hi! Thought I'd drop in for a quick review.

First of all, this essay is simply AMAZING. I am sure that every teenager, which includes me, can relate to it. Emotions and feelings shine in every single line of this piece of literary work, and I think that's the quality of a good writer.

Okay, now coming to the review.

1) I think you should begin the second, fifth and sixth paragraph with an uppercase letter unless, of course, you don't want to do that on purpose.

2) You probably forgot to put a period at the end of the last line.

These are just minor flaws. Other than that, the essay is perfect. The title of the essay compliments it. Keeping it short and simple instead of beating around the bush made it more powerful and easier to relate to. The sentences were worded properly and well-punctuated. Portraying the differences between the ignorant bliss of childhood and the dark realization of maturity was done in a responsible and artistic manner, without confusing the reader or putting the blame on a particular person or group.

Overall, this was a very emotional and beautiful essay. Keep up the good work!