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depression isn't funny

by SarukaTheHuman


me

unlike you

am genuinely crying

you mock my tears

use them for your own entertainment

so when you see me you think I'm the one forcing tears.

.

i

unlike you

am actually falling

you lower yourself to the ground laughing

while i crash and burn

and you see me and think i'm going to get up

.

i

unlike you

am screaming

screaming for anyone to help me

while you use my pain for comedy

..

we

as society

see lethal humor as common

and with no fault

so when i cry out to you,

casually mentioning my choice in a conversation

you laugh a little and stop.

.

silence thumps in my brain

you seem to me as if you don't care

my friend won't save me

..

you

you silenced my cries

my pain

my screams

.

because you thought it was funny


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8 Reviews


Points: 386
Reviews: 8

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Sun Apr 30, 2017 10:40 pm
FizzyGirl wrote a review...



Hi fizzygirl here for a review.
I was looking through poems and I told myself I'm going to sleep now but then I saw you poem title and I said to myslef I have to read this one. I know I'm soposed to criticize your poem to make you better and improve, but in my opinion you can't edit or re write this, it's to true to change, don't change a word it's completely accurate and you know what they say you can't change the truth. This poem really just left me deep in thought and I just loved it, it had so much character and feeling put into it. I know you got a few other reviews saying you should add on and maybe that would be good but I think if you leave it the way it is it really creates a dramatic effect, especially the ending and if you add onto it it will lessen the effect and not leave people shaken or unnerved. Your poem will stay in people's minds more if you have a dramatic ending, like you did, I really don't have a bad word to say about this poem. And you really capture how people think that depression is made up or don't take it seriously and just laugh it off, because way to many people do that and I think your poem states the unfareness that people only take illnesses they can see seriously. Your poem will open people's eyes to what is happening, what is being overlooked. Sorry I'm rambling on now, anyway this was a beautiful poem and I loved it, this probably didn't help as I couldn't find anything wrong in it but anyway happy writing.
-fizzygirl






Thanks!





Thanks!



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Tue Apr 25, 2017 12:51 pm
Aubrey7 says...



At the end you should add-because you thought it was funny. Because you thought it was a joke. Because you thought I was worth nothing. But you thought wrong, you were wrong. Because of you, I feel this way. because of you, I am depressed. All because you thought it was funny. I know it's your stile to write with no capitals, but I think you should capitalize the "I"




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Tue Apr 25, 2017 12:45 pm
Aubrey7 says...



at the end you should add

because you thought it was funny

because you thought it was a joke

because you thought i was worth nothing

but you thought wrong, you were wrong

because of you, i feel this way

because of you, i am depressed

all because you thought it was funny




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6 Reviews


Points: 103
Reviews: 6

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Tue Apr 25, 2017 4:29 am



I thought that this was the best way to describe what many people feel and it is really relatable. No one really tries listening to our pain, not because they think it's funny but because it is too much for them to handle. Regardless there are some people who never understand what we feel because they turn a blind eye to our pin. But don't feel let down because of that. You face this pain because you are strong enough to face it. This poem really touches the depth of my heart and I can feel almost like there's a bit of personal pain put into this. I really loved the last bit:
you
you silenced my cries
my pain
my screams

because you thought it was funny


Keep up the good work. You're really good at this! Have a nice day!
XOXO
GirlWithATypewriter




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6 Reviews


Points: 103
Reviews: 6

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Tue Apr 25, 2017 4:29 am
GirlWithATypewriter wrote a review...



I thought that this was the best way to describe what many people feel and it is really relatable. No one really tries listening to our pain, not because they think it's funny but because it is too much for them to handle. Regardless there are some people who never understand what we feel because they turn a blind eye to our pin. But don't feel let down because of that. You face this pain because you are strong enough to face it. This poem really touches the depth of my heart and I can feel almost like there's a bit of personal pain put into this. I really loved the last bit:
you
you silenced my cries
my pain
my screams

because you thought it was funny


Keep up the good work. You're really good at this! Have a nice day!
XOXO
GirlWithATypewriter




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77 Reviews


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Reviews: 77

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Sat Apr 22, 2017 4:40 pm
VegasLights wrote a review...



Hey, SarukaTheHuman!
This poem was absolutely AMAZING. I can relate to this so much because I tried telling my friends that I have depression but most of them just laughed. I wanted to cry even more but I couldn't because they would just laugh. Like you said, depression isn't funny. I loved how your poem was relatable it spoke to me, like there is truly people out there who needs someone to just listen and not laugh.

Back to the poem, I would change absolutely nothing! That is really all I have to say, just nothing needs to be changed. I thank you for your time and I hope you have a great day!

~Keep Writing~

Miranda.
(Previously Steam1244)




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14 Reviews


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Fri Apr 21, 2017 9:21 pm
BubblegumGoddess wrote a review...



Hi SarukaTheHuman!
I found this poem really relatable. I also enjoyed how you sort of called out society when you said
"we

as society

see lethal humor as common

and with no fault"
Far too often people don't realize when someone is seriously hurting and I can tell that you are one of those who are going through a rough time. This poem is lovely, deep, and dark. Although those are common things found in poems, your take is true to your unique style.
I would though, like to question your use of 1-2 periods in between paragraphs and was wondering why you used them?
-BubblegumGoddess




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Fri Apr 21, 2017 8:41 pm
snowmonkey9 wrote a review...



Your poem had a unique style and is really beautiful but like you said your poem is kinda depressing. Dark and serious poetry is a little typical. There is this poet i know, Barry Plamondon who writes an even mixture of serious and funny poems. Here's one by him called
The Penny-
"Whatever happened to the penny?
One day it seemed there were to many
And the next they were gone
Simply all withdrawn
I wonder where they went
I used to like that little brown cent."

I suggest you read some of his poetry. His books are available as eBooks. His first book is called This 'n' That Bric a Brac and his second book is called Crackers and Crumbs. Reading his poetry surely inspired me.






Hi there!
I'm going through some depressing times right now, and poetry helps me to vent, so this is the outcome of my depression. I find it easy to just pour out this sad, emo poetry and it's%u200Bjust normal for me.



snowmonkey9 says...


It's great to write out ur thoughts and how ur feeling in poetry. I didn't realise this poem was how ur feeling right now in that case keep writing depressing poetry as long as it helps you.



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35 Reviews


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Fri Apr 21, 2017 8:55 am
Augustus wrote a review...



Hey!
Augustus here for the review.

Let me just start by saying that, I absolutely loved the pattern of your poem. Although, it was hard to follow near the end, but I liked the way your poem proceeded.
About the subject you've chosen, I am grateful to you. You've captured it very nicely. And also, if you ever felt a need to talk, you could just message me. I promise, I will listen.
All in all, your poem was good but I guess I would've liked it even more-- if you had made me scratch my head, a bit. Just an advice-- to add a little more imaginary.
I would love to read more from you!

Good luck and keep writing.
Augustus~




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Thu Apr 20, 2017 11:14 pm
With3r3dros3 says...



T-th-th-this, this is ABSOLUTELY BEAUTIFUL.
I love this so much.
This kind of reminds me of one of my "best friends" that I tried telling MULTIPLE times that I have a strong belief that I have depression and all they did was just say "Phoebe, you are AS SEE THROUGH AS GLASS! You don't have depression so just stop saying that!!" Whenever I hear those piercing words of his, I just feel a billion times worse and I want to go and cry in a dark corner. :( I mean, he's one of my best friends and I didn't feel like telling my boyfriend because I didn't want him to worry about me too much (not like he does, anyway) and I trusted him and you wanna know what he did the next day??? At lunch (the only time when we get to talk to our other best friends, including my bf), he just flat out told them what I told him. It made me want to kill myself so much. It's not like I'm trying to get attention by saying I might have depression, anyways....

Ya know, if I wanted my other "best friends" to know, I would've told them about it, too.




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Thu Apr 20, 2017 11:02 pm
KaraStevens wrote a review...



Hello, Sari! Kara Stevens here for a (hopefully) long and rambling and tear-inducing review!

I couldn't find any grammar stuff except for the inconstancy of the lines between the paragraphs. There are sometimes two lines instead of one... like this:

..


instead of

.


and it just struck me as odd.

Now, Sari, I am your BEST FRIEND in real life NO MATTER WHAT YOU SAY and I don't want this to happen to you EVER come on man don't do this to me I don't laugh at you I'm a little depressed myself and we laugh together whenever we laugh don't EVER EVER commit suicide on me YOU UNDERSTAND?! Talk to me if you want or anything but just let me know if there's anything that you wanna talk about if you're feeling this way in real life TALK TO ME SERIOUSLY my gosh I feel like I'm taking this so far and I'm going to feel REALLY EMBARRASSED if you didn't write this about yourself but I CARE TOO MUCH ABOUT YOU you're my best friend for God's sake and please don't do this to yourself.

Rant done.

Anyways.

**regains composure.

This was a very tear-inducing poem. And a very rambling-response type of poem, as you can see from my above paragraph...

Keep on writing!--

Kara R. Stevens.

PS: Seriously consider my rant.

((EDIT: Wow this was almost 1,000 characters long good job me nice long rant))





Doors are for people with no imagination.
— Skulduggery Pleasant