Young Writers Society

The 'nursery rhyme' feel of the poem makes it very fun to read! It's short but compensates with the length of each line. That is very amusing. The format in which this poem is written is definitely not usual, but art should not be limited to hard guidelines. If it sticks within the rules of grammar, write it as you please!
The story being told was intriguing, too. One is left to wonder what became of Rose and John, and what did Rose have to do with Concord that made him consent to a door...
Imagination knows no bounds.

Hey, Addemup! Scythe here for a quick review

I'm super excited to read this; the title was interesting and very mysterious! "Without a Door", I really want to know what you mean by that! ^-^

Alright, first I will talk about what I liked, then what I did not like and then cover any nitpicky issues that may appear.

What I liked:

1. I adored the rhythm! It was funny how you repeated the "-oor" sound throughout this, it took any seriousness away from this poem, but had a great effect, I enjoyed it!

2. I loved the old feel to it and the farm setting!


[b]What I disliked:[b]

1. The flow was a little too interrupted and I felt like the arrangements of sentences should have been a little different, some of them failed to make sense:

John Shad, a cottar was he, with ragged leather for clothes;

John Shad, the cotter, clad in ragged leather for clothes,

John Shad, the cottar, was clad in ragged leather clothes,
Working in his four acres of land, with a lame left hand
And a lady named Rose for a wife.

Faithful to his lord, the one of Concord and even though John was poor,
Working year 'round, he had never felt down... Even without a door.

Rose, however, was all but glad; for instead, she was sad.
Being so very poor, she was always cold and her bread would sometimes mold.

Indeed, she wanted a door.
Rose had begged and pleaded, for a door she so badly needed,
But they were both still so poor.
However, with Concord's consent, Rose became content, since they finally had a door.

Okay, so there are a few things that I didn't particularly like about your rhyming style, but as always, I do not hold the opinion of everyone, and some may very much enjoy it.

So, first off, the first two lines don't really go with the rest of the poem. It starts out. "John SHAD, a cottar was HE, with ragged leather for clothes;" So, the two words that I put in caps lock are the end of line 1 and 2 out of the 3. With all the other lines, these two rhyme with each other. I honestly don't mind this much, but there are some out there who would sour at this.

Second of all, a few of lines drag you off beat a little, but just a little. It's nothing to freak over, so don't worry to much about it.

Third of all, and this is the one thing that bugged me a little bit (OCD kicked in, haha). After the first stanza, they all have the same words at the end to rhyme them; poor and door. Most of the poems that I have read make sure to stay clear from this, so I'm only using what I've learned. If this was planned for, then go with it, cuz there are lots of people who would love this! This is just my own personal opinion.

However, in the end, I liked it. It's clever, simple, short, and to the point. And it's not one of those poems that you're like, "How the f*** did you pick that title for this poem?!" In the end, bravo, and keep up the good work.

And please, don't take anything I said too hard. I've had some of my poems judged very harshly, and I know how much it can suck, so I tried to be nice. Sorry if I wasn't. Keep it up though!