Good Morning/Afternoon/Evening/Night(whichever one it is in your part of the world),
Hi! I'm here to leave a quick review!!
First Impression: Okayy...this was quite a powerful prologue, I especially loved the ending, the start was a bit more on the shakier side of things but the ending was really well written here.
Anyway let's get right to it,
“What was that noise?” A man, probably in his teens, spoke quietly as he kept walking deep inside the dark woods, holding only a lit lighter that only had a little flame. He kept hearing the sound of leaves blowing in the wind. He didn’t know what to do, but he did know that he has to escape as quickly as he can.
Okay...its a little weird to say probably in his teens because it appears the narrator is trying to guess what kind of age the person and that's a little awkward. Other than that, a pretty spooky little situation here, lots of darkness and a flickering weak light, certainly a lovely bit of atmosphere to start this story off on, I'm loving this so far. Certainly an awesome setting for the opening of a prologue.
He heard the noise again. He crouched down by a bush, looking out in the darkness.His breathing became heavy, his body shaking. “Fuck…”
He saw a dark figure walking slowly across the woods.
“What the hell is that…?”
Okay...well that was quite a strong reaction to that, you can clearly see that this person is pretty scared of what is happening around them at the moment, and is quite jumpy in general from the way that they are reaction to things here.
The teenager took out his cell phone, looking at the screen. “Still no service and five percent left…”
Ooh, that does add a lovely bit of extra tension into the scene as we see that there's not going to be an easy way out of the situation using the phone. That's a detail a lot of people forget to put in, so this is nice to see.
He stood up, looking around to find an exit out of the woods. He noticed a small opening to the outside of the woods. “There!” He started running, his skin getting sliced from the branches of the trees. As soon as he made it out the woods, he kneeled down to take a breath. He touched his face, noticing blood on his hands from the fresh cuts. He stood back up and turned to look at the woods he just escaped from.
“That was close.” He then turned back around, and screamed loudly.
Oh gosh wow, that was quite a move there, on one hand we have the really intense sequence there a he's trying to run out of the woods. I really love how you make it almost seem like the woods themselves are a character here that's actively trying to stop him from being able to leave. It really makes things seem even more spooky, and then of course that last part with the loud screaming. That's just about the perfect stuff you want in a prologue.
His body lay lifeless on the ground, his face ripped off from his own body. His phone was on the ground beside him. A text message appeared on the screen.
Jaye, where are you?
Well, that was a fun cut to black, oh dear, that sounds like a properly brutal murder..and uhh I assume once he was out, the service came back cause well, a very fitting message there to end this prologue off, all in all, this makes for a really cool ending to the prologue that will certainly make you want to read on to find out what happened here.
Overall: Overall, this is a pretty solid prologue here, it certainly manages to check off most of the boxes that you would expect from one of these, and this is certainly a story that I would read here. It sounds like it could be pretty mysterious here.
As always remember to take what you think was helpful and forget the rest.
Stay Safe
Harry
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Reviews: 4101
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