z

Young Writers Society



Criticizing Others

by donizback


Talking is one of the easiest things in the world. It can be in a form of giving some kind of an opinion or simply criticizing others over their work. On the other hand, one of the most difficult thing in the world is to keep quite and listen. Listening is never easy, especially when you are being criticized; and it becomes even more difficult when you have already set an opinion, in your head, as to what the other person will say.

Whenever you criticize others, thinking that you are better than them, is usually the case you have to ask yourself "If you really are better than them?" Because when you are smarter than others, you want to become even more smarter and you think you don't have enough knowledge; in the same way, when you have more money than others, you want even more because you are scared it is insufficient for you. Like attracts like anyway.

I have associated a story with it. It is directly taken from Masnavi Rumi (Persian book).

 A grammarian sat down in a boat. That egotist turned his face towards the boatman and asked, "Have you studied any grammar?"

He replied, "No."

The grammarian said, "Then half your life has gone to waste."

The boatman thereupon felt very depressed, but he kept silent from answering at that moment.

Then suddenly the wind tossed the boat into a whirlpool. The boatman shouted to the grammarian, "Do you know how to swim?"

"No, O good-answering, handsome-faced man!", was the reply.

The boatman then said, "If that is the case, the whole of your life has gone to waste, for the boat is sinking in these whirlpools."

Everyone has got a talent in them; we are born with a unique quality which is different from others. All of us have a clear idea of how others should lead their lives; But none about our own!

One spends his life correcting others but fail to see where he is wrong. Self-development is an ongoing process which only ends when one has died.

"A life lesson is learnt today,

but my life just ended today!"


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Wed Aug 05, 2015 6:42 am
Mysticalxx wrote a review...



I love the message this article is conveying. Thanks for getting this out to people! I have read the story you mentioned, and it IS very thought-provoking.

A few things; When you wrote "One of the most difficult things in the world is to keep quite and listen", it should be QUIET.

Also, you could try writing this using figurative language, instead of just simple, basic words. Not that it isn't good, but it would give a better impression to readers that way. Just saying! ;)

The first line is very true. When I become silent soemtimes, my family think I'm sulking or I'm depressed or something. Oh well.

Keep it up!

Mysticalxx




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Wed Dec 10, 2014 7:52 am
Eldritch wrote a review...



Well, Hello there! (That's what your profile picture's saying, no?)

It's a nicely written article. I always appreciate articles. Because, here, you've to be clear on your thoughts and I consider myself as article-writer, I have tried other things too, but, those ended up really in a awkward way.

Anyway, coming to the point, at one thing, i'm bit confused. do think, criticizing others is always bad? i think, sometimes it's useful, like at YWS, on literary works, criticize is useful. BUT, i do agree that, over-criticizing is really bad. We should never do that.

"All of us have a clear idea of how others should lead their lives; But none about our own!"

I totally agree with this. We all are like while giving advice, "You should do this, do that, be like this, be like that" but, when it comes to our lives, we seem to be partly hopeless. about this i guess, there's a saying,

"Do as I say, not as I do"

Well, and about the story you mentioned i read it when i was a kid and it's a very popular one. The story shows us that how we should be like and perhaps, this also, we should learn things outside from textbooks!

Anyway, very good article, I enjoyed reading it.

Stay fine and in fun!

~~Min




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Wed Aug 06, 2014 12:53 pm
EPICnumber1 wrote a review...



Hi
I really like this because the first bit before the story is totally true, I really get where you are comming from with this. I didn't really get the tory and how it linked in with the first part but I liked it. Before the story in the paragraphs you really made me think and if you showed this to some more people who criticize and asked them to really think about what it means then they might have a change of heart. (yes I am aware of how stupid that sounds) :). I think you should try to expand more on your opening paragraphs and find another story that links with your view, I'm not says screw this one just add another on to it. Not to be rude or anything but I think you should look up criticize in a dictionary maybe that would help you explain things maybe a little better. But I will have to agree with megsug on how you have explained critism, it sounds like its bullying.

I love the topic though and the story as well but you could make this even better by just editing the content a little but over all a good topic and a good piece :)

-EPICnumber1 :)




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Wed Aug 06, 2014 12:15 pm
erilea wrote a review...



Donizback, I've met you before yet not too much on this site have I seen you. If you don't remember me...


WISEGIRL22 IS AWESOME!!!!!!!!!!,

So, the first thing my sharp as a claw eyes detected was in the beginning. You misspelled "quiet" with "quite". Minor error, mind you.

"On the other hand, one of the most difficult thing in the world is to keep quite and listen."

Also, these quotation marks are unnecessary. If they are, reword the question as "Am I really better than them?"

"If you really are better than them?"

The story was a bit confusing, but the whole thing was great; just mind your wording and minor errors. Byezeez!

-wisegirl22




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Sun Jul 27, 2014 4:01 pm
megsug wrote a review...



Hey~
I haven't seen you around much recently ;n;
I always told you I'd take a look at your stuff, and it's taken sooo long. I'm sorry xP Life and stuff, you know?

What a cute topic! I'm going to jump in.

one of the most difficult thing in the world is to keep quiet and listen

Oh no~ Be careful with typos and be sure to reread. Articles are all about establishing reliability. Typos instantly make a reader doubt the author's authority on the topic.

Whenever you criticize others, thinking that you are better than them, is usually the case you have to ask yourself "If you really are better than them?" Because when you are smarter than others, you want to become even more smarter and you think you don't have enough knowledge; in the same way, when you have more money than others, you want even more because you are scared it is insufficient for you. Like attracts like anyway.

Um... What? This paragraph is really jumbled. I'm not really sure what you're intended meaning is. I'm going to try to clean it up though, adding things in blue and explaining why I'm doing what I'm doing in red.
Whenever you criticize others, thinking that you are better than them, [I'm striking this out because the way you've done your punctuation makes it seem like you're explaining what criticizing others is, but the way you've defined it is incorrect. I don't think it's necessary because most people reading your article will know what criticize means. If they don't, they can look it up. If you feel like you must include something about people feeling better than others try:] or start thinking that you are better than them is usually the case you have to should ask yourself "If you Am I really are better than them?" [I struck out "is usually the case because it sounded really awkward and was too wordy. I changed the question because you have it in quotation marks as if the person you're addressing in this article is asking themselves] Because when you are smarter than others, you want to become even more smarter [more and the -er in smarter mean the same thing. The grammar is incorrect if you include the more as well as the -er. In this case, even smarter is correct] and you think you don't have enough knowledge; in the same way, when you have more money than others, you want even more because you are scared it is insufficient for you. [This is where you lose me. I don't know what you mean at all. You need to explain this more. It may take several paragraphs. That's okay] Like attracts like anyway. [What does this last sentence have to do with anything?]


It is directly taken from Masnavi Rumi (Persian book).

Take out the Persian book part. It doesn't serve any purpose in citation.

Like the other reviewers, it has to be pointed out that more than half of your essay is someone else's story. At the very least you need to wrap this up with your own words explaining how this story illustrates your point. Really though, you need to beef the entire essay up with explanation.

I love the story you chose though. It does fit the context of the essay, and is very wise.

I hope to see around more, and I'll be stopping by a few more of your articles this review day,
Megs~




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Sun Jul 27, 2014 2:55 pm
Sunshine wrote a review...



Hi, Sunshine from Team Plasma here on this wonderful review day to review it all!

You've picked a topic the is a blatant flaw of many human beings, a problem many times highlighted. People are always saying listen more, criticize less. I was hoping, in reading this, to get a new view, some new information and opinion on the topic; when you choose to write an essay on a topic many times written of, you have to try and be as fresh as possible.

I feel like your length hurt you there. You didn't dive into the ideas as much as I think you could have. Length, long or short, can be a bit of a deterrent. Looking at this, I thought, what can he fit in there that I didn't already think of?

The beginning two paragraphs were well-written, and got be interested in what was to come. And then, this happened;

Like attracts like anyway


This is too sassy. You've adopted a semi-formal tone, and this sentance totally distracts from what you've got going on. Just get rid of it.

Masnavi Rumi (Persian book).


Is there any way you can site this better? It feels like too little for something you've taken such a giant chunk of. What sort of book is it?

I'd love for the story part to be italicized, or something to separate it from the opinion stuff. It blends too well, when it is supposed to stick out.

Everyone has got a talent in them; we are born with a unique quality which is different from others. All of us have a clear idea of how others should lead their lives; But none about our own!


This has very little connection to what you were talking about up top. I can connect it, sure, but I need you to connect me instead. The way this is phrased seems off-topic. I thought we were talking about listening and criticism? This definitely is in the category, but needs another forerunner paragraph to go up to it.

The quote at the end is unnecessary and doesn't make much sense. Scrap it.

I really think length would improve this! Expand your ideas and explain them.

I hope my review was helpful!

Image




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Mon Jul 14, 2014 7:32 pm
nickstark195 wrote a review...



Hey, Nick with a review! :)

First of all, the essay has a good key idea. Good enough, in fact, that I feel like it should have contained more information. It feels as though the idea and point of the essay was rushed by being fit in the first two paragraphs. Perhaps you should try working on expressing the moral in a more detailed manor. Also, try branching out from your topic a little. Not like straying away from your idea, but rather finding other subtopics and more information regarding the main topic to write about. (Using a larger vocabulary can also help with this.)

The use of the story from Masnavi Rumi was nice. I enjoyed it and thought it was a good reference and a good piece of literature. But again, it felt a little rushed though. I would recommend working on transitions, maybe using a paragraph to transition into it. It helps the reader to feel less surprised and more satisfied.

All in all, I enjoy the essay, I would just like to see more from it. It was a pleasure to read your work and I hope this advice helps.

Best wishes,
Nicholas L. Stark (")>




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Mon Jul 14, 2014 5:52 pm
AdmiralKat wrote a review...



Hello! KatyaElefant here for another review! Ughh, I'm going to feel so hypocritical.

I have to say, your organization is not the best. I love everything else but that one element just jumps out at me. You have this philosophy at the start and then all of a sudden, you have a story that helps support it but you don't have points. You need to try to narrow down a bit. Try to think of 3 reasons why you are right or 3 things about criticizing. Then make 3 separate paragraphs about these three points. That could help your readers a lot to know what's up. I like the story but you should move it to the beginning as an intro or hook and you should paraphrase it, it seems a bit long for an essay/article. If you are writing about this story, then you should tell us the main aspects about it and summarize it so that we don't have to think this a story instead of an article. One more thing, your organization of paragraphs is kind of weird. In a story, this is good organization but if you are writing in an essay, you want to try to use as few paragraphs as possible. You shouldn't have dialogue in here at all, instead quotes for a passage or story. If you have any questions about organizing your essay, be sure to tell me because I would be glad to help.

You have great grammar and spelling. Every other aspect of this essay is great. If I made you feel bad, I am sooo sorry! 0-0 I didn't mean to do it. All you have to do is make it more clear and more organized and you will be good! :D Great job! Keep calm and keep writing!





I'm all in favor of keeping dangerous weapons out of the hands of fools. Let's start with typewriters.
— Solomon Short