Young Writers Society

Hello rhiasofia, Racket here to review this marvelous poem.
I really love this poem. There is a sophistication that I don't believe I could ever achieve. Your meaning is so clear, and yet not. At a first glance you wonder, is this about someone, or about time? At a second glance, more of a reading, you can tell that this is about a person, and since on of your genres is romance, I'll believe this is a love poem. The only flaw in this poem that I can see is that it is hard to identify the meaning of it.
I really loved the lines:
"The childish notion takes me,
shakes me, and never lets me go."
This is a really nice way of describing what is going on inside. I believe I can hypothesize, but I am not entirely sure of the "childish notion" is here. This part needs perhaps a bit more description, though if you are the mystery type, it works well in making the reader guess.
I noticed when reading the part quoted above that not all of your lines are capitalized. This is not a necessary thing, but it is more natural and fairly common in poetry. I believe you should look into the option of capitalizing the first letter of every line. I see that you capitalized the first letter of every sentence, which is good, but, as I said, it is more natural in poetry to capitalize every line.
As a pet peeve of mine, I noticed that your final stanza's sentence starts with 'But'. This is grammatically incorrect, though I do not know if it is in poetry. I find it hard to avoid starting sentences with 'but' as well, though you should try to avoid it.
That's it! Three mistakes, two of which are barely noticeable pet peeves. (I absolutely loved the description of this piece!) Congratulations on a magnificent piece of literature, and I cannot wait to read more! Happy Review Day!!
~Racket

Hello and happy review day! Purple here to vouch for Salsa Verde! Let's get started.
I think you have blown me away with this. The wonderful diction and imagery that you created just added that touch of nostalgia that was necessary. "I wanted you in some unfair fashion" making it clear that you are aware that you're not obligated to have this person be what you want them to, but yearning for it anyway. Whoever this is about, it gives that beginning lost feeling that love or infatuation gives. "The childish notion" is definitely something that strongly takes ahold of someone when in love. It's questioning everything you do and worrying about everything you say and feeling clumsy and immature for letting it get so far. You don't want to be confined to the restrictions of time and (I love this line) "forget it in the back rows of subways".

Continuing to the nitpicks, I'm not sure I have many. This line felt weird to be in the beginning of the poem,

" if only
for a trice."

but maybe because I didn't quite understand what you meant to do with that.
With

"about how we keep track of time
and why- "

I would just say "about why we keep track of time"; the 'and why-' feels to be interrupting something or even being interrupted.

Other than those minute details that could be tweaked or not, I loved this! It shows the feeling of love in being young and lost and wanting it to stay that way.
Happy reviewing!
~Purple

Hello.
Kanome here with a review for you.

I really like this poem. It's interesting to me, and probably to your other readers too.
I believe you're talented in poetry, like, really talented.

Anyways, time for nitpicks.
Okay, I only saw one error in here. It's just the word insane.
Inane - Insane

Unless, you meant to that word? If that's a word, then that's a new word I learned this week.
Anywho, keep up the great work.
I can't wait to read more of your writings.

Greetings rhiasofia!
First off I have to comment on your vocabulary. It's remarkable. Extraordinary. Marvelous. Awesome. etc, etc. It is so developed that you used a word which made me grab for my dictionary just to make sure it is a word (inane. At first I thought you meant in"s"ane, but make dictionary showed me the truth. Honest mistake )
Anyway. I love the way you make this piece very flowing like time itself with the effective use of enjambments. Remarkable.
I could actually relate to this piece! I believe that every person has this feeling some time or the other in their lives, but few ever admit it.
I can't say anything more about this piece than Bravo. I hope to read many more of your works.
I rate this piece 8.5 out of ten. *Gives standing ovation*
Sincerely,
The Wandering Wizard