Young Writers Society

I like the general idea of this essay but I think it needs to be more smooth. You should elaborate on the idea a bit more and have more transition words. I advice you put something in this poem like 2 plus 2 is 5, to me now. Of course, you should phrase that better but you get my point. I think also you should have more better grammar(but I can't say that I have great grammar). Overall, I love the poem, I can really relate to this poem. I am terrible at grammar and I love math.

Greetings, once again.

One of the things I love about poetry is that you never know exactly what to expect. If one were, for example, to judge this poem just by its title, one would think it was about someone's opinion of how terrible a subject mathematical science is, when in fact the theme is so much more than just that.

I see that the first five lines lack any full stops, as well as the last three. In poetry, such grammatical restrictions are usually null and void, but seeing as you have used it in three of your lines, three from below, it is a little disturbing. I suggest rather removing all of the full stops in your poem, because if you start adding punctuation, you need to add it throughout the entire poem and ensure it is correct.

Speaking of punctuation, here is a list of six rules concerning comma usage:
1. We use commas to separate words or phrases in a list.
2. Commas indicate where one phrase or clause ends and another begins.
3. Additional information, that could have been inserted in brackets or between dashes, may be separated from the rest of the sentence by a comma or commas.
4. We place commas before and after words such as however and nevertheless.
5. Introductory words or phrases are separated from the rest of the sentence with a comma.
6. Avoid using a comma between two main clauses[color]; this is reffered to as the [color=red]comma splice error. Rather use a full stop, semi-colon or a conjuction.

I hope the above list helps!

As for your poem, it is an interesting and touching view on how miserable and melancholic one feels when someone you love or on whom you have a crush, takes no notice of you. I especially admire how the single "But" halfway through the sentence can swift the mood of the poem in entirely the opposite direction. Many people can also identify with your writing, which makes it all the more powerful.

I congratulate you on another well-written work.

Rating for this text: three and a half stars (very good)

Greetings etherealember!

I don't usually review poems, but because maths has always had a special place in my heart, I decided I should give this a shot.
First of all I think your vocabulary suits this piece very well. I can't really comment on grammar (being afraid I'll lead you off a cliff), so I won't.
This piece actually describes the phase I'm going through at this point in my life.I really like this girl in my class (including the maths class), but just as we start connecting, she gets distracted and forgets that I'm even there. You did a marvelous job by converting that feeling into a poem.
My final comment on this poem only requires one word: Brilliant. Therefore I am rating this poem 8.5 out of ten.

Sincerely,
The Wandering Wizard

I can relate to this. I'll be in class or something, chatting it up real good with a girl, making her smile and laugh ( which is rare me being the most awkward person to walk the earth) and i will be all happy and feeling good about my self.... then the next time i see her its like we've never even looked at each other. It's very irksome indeed. nice poem ma'am.