z

Young Writers Society


E - Everyone

Everett--My favorite person

by Goodman


As a child, I did not have many friends. The friends I did have, however, were not in any of my classes, nor my recess time. This, of course, gave me enough time to explore the playground. This was not just a “come together and play” type playground; it was “we all have groups and you are not part of it” type playground. There were social classes and they were harsh, but that is not why I liked the playground. That playground is unforgettable to me because of the memories I had with a special someone, the memories that are forever in my heart.

Sitting in the worn-down swings, I had the perfect view of the whole playground. All the cliques were right where they normally were. The sporty group gathered around the basketball hoops, the prissy girly-girls were not that far away. The nerds were reading their books on the wooden bench on the other side of the grounds. Other groups were scattered around the vast playground, like on the monkey bars, the twisting slides, the stairs, and the metal jungle gym.

Like the loner I was, I swung in those swings by myself. I spied a silhouette of a person I never saw before. He was sitting by himself by the massive oak tree on the opposite side of the playground. Just as I was about to stop swinging to go over and introduce myself, when the bullies of the playground went over to the figure and started to pick on him and push him around. The child was very calm and did not look disgruntled. After the bullies went away, I made my way over to the boy. He was not what I was expecting. He was in a black suit and had pure white skin—like an albino. He had dark brown hair and stunning blue eyes. He smiled a little when he saw my friendly face. I introduced myself and he told me that his name was Everett. We quickly became friends, good friends even. We both were different from the other kids in school. I had a horrible speech impediment and he had a disease that made his skin completely white. We watched out for one another during our time together.

Everett and I had a lot of adventures on the playground. As the cliques were watching and judging us, Everett and I were having a good ole time. We used our imagination and the playground. When we went over a river we used the monkey bars as jungle vines to swing to the other side. Whenever the adventure called for it, we would use the slides as a dramatic death or near death experience. The bridge that connected the two halves of the playground was a good place for pretend sword fighting or even for reenacting scenes from Star Wars, which happened to be both of our favorite movie series. The tower that was at the beginning of one of the slides looked like a tower from a princess movie. On occasion, we would imagine that there were dragons in the way of rescuing the princess. That would mean that we had to be like ninjas and climb the outer wall of the tower and surrounding pieces to rescue the make-believe princess.

Everett and I would also play cowboys on the spring riders and pretend to capture outlaws. Other times, we would use the spinner as a spaceship and go into outer space. Our mission was to go to the Moon and defeat the evil blue people and bring back cheese. One time, we used the jungle gym to impersonate someone who is in the circus. Another time, Everett used it as a ship and I was the sea monster.

On a Friday the month before school ended, Everett told me something very important: something that has changed my life forever. He whispered a phrase that did not mean anything to me at that time. It was, “Don’t change, Victoria. Don’t form into what society wants you to be. You are who you are.” He proceeded to tell me that he would always remember me and that he was very grateful that I was his friend, his only friend. Monday came around and Everett was not there. Tuesday, he was still missing. Weeks went by, he never came around.

Seven years later, I received a letter in the mail. It did not have a return address on it. I opened it and it said, “Remember who you are, Victoria. Remember what I told you on the playground? Don’t be what society wants.” It was signed “Love you always, Everett.” Even after years of being missing, my childhood best friend, is still looking after me. His tender words of wisdom have helped mold me into who I am today—a confident, non-changing girl who loves life to the fullest. Who knows, what is loved today may be gone tomorrow.


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317 Reviews


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Wed Mar 05, 2014 3:13 pm
lostthought wrote a review...



Ok, so I read the title and thought that you meant that you were lost in the woods and he found you and you played and then he led you out. Not what I was expecting but ok. Welcome to YWS and I am lost, your reviewer.

So nitpicks- I only saw one.

Even after years of being missing, my childhood best friend, is still looking after me.

Ok, now lose that second comma, it's not needed in this sentence.

This is a heart warming tale about two people who are lonely and fate brings them together on the playground. Then, a promise is made,a promise that is never forgotten, even when they have not seen each other for seven years. It's very beautiful and you capture the imagery and details rather nicely. Great job! Keep writing,

-lost




Goodman says...


Thanks for the review Lost ^_^



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12 Reviews


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Mon Mar 03, 2014 10:38 am
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MrGreen says...



This is a very good piece; full of depth and emotion. You captured the feelings of what it is to be isolated and alone in such an environment very well indeed; a fact which lends substance to the characters. An impressive feat given the relatively short length of this story. The ending is sad but, at the same time, meaningful and uplifting; although perhaps it just needs a little work to make it feel more solid and rounded. But apart from that this story is fantastic, with a powerful moral message which I find easy to sympathise with.




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Sat Mar 01, 2014 7:18 am
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BTubz wrote a review...



A generally enjoyable piece. The descriptions of their times spent together are smile-worthy and heartwarming. However, I would have really liked to have actually been in one of those scenes in the present, not just told as an old memory. The old, fond memories kinda ramble on without definitive meaning so to speak. Finally, I'd try to come up with a better last line. As to what exactly, I'm not entirely sure. Something powerful, all encompassing, clever. Either that, or just end it at "Who knows, what is loved today may be gone tomorrow." It makes a better ending than what you have currently.

Hope that helped. Keep up the good work




Goodman says...


Alright, thanks! I wasn't sure how to end it. I like your suggestion of ending it at "Who knows, what is loved today may be gone tomorrow."

Thanks again for the review ^_^




I don't know half of you half as well as I should like; and I like less than half of you half as well as you deserve.
— Bilbo Baggins