-Kal is a 20 year old girl here and no one knows she is a girl. She has spent the last 5 years as a squire and servant to Prince Aidan. Through out the 5 years Aidan has befriended a small group of 7 knights that figure out Kal's secret but say nothing. After 3.5 years of taking crap from Aidan and saving him a few times Kal earns the official title of Squire. Within the next 1.5 years Aidan finds out Kal's secret and Kal finds out the others knew. Aidan becomes King and a month after crowning a war breaks out. Aidan gives the emblem of Brenmawr to Kal (a symbol of knighthood) and this is their private conversation for Kal's knighting ceremony.
"Will you always defend those who need you?”
“Until my last breath.”
“Will you always speak of truth.” Kal’s heart skipped
“I shall sir.”
“Will you be loyal to your king.”
“Until the day you are not honorable to your people.”
“Will you in courage charity upon the rich, even with the cost of your title.”
“I shall, even with the cost of my life.” Aidan shuttered for a moment with the thought of Kal dying.
“When on a quest you will never avoid the enemy out of fear nor remove armor except for sleep.”
“I promise to fight full heartedly and never be caught off guard.”
“Will you fight for you kingdom in tournament and in battle.”
“As long as the sun still rises.”
“Upon imprisonment you will not speak of the kingdom and not seek revenge afterward.”
“As long as I am the only one injured, I shall keep Brenmawr’s trades and secrets within my mind.”
“From returning home after a journey or quest you will share in you journeys as though no one was with you to witness themselves.”
“I will always speak of my travels to those of this kingdom.”
“Then as king of Brenmawr, I Aidan Diarmid Ewan Abimelech dub thou high knight of Brenmawr and second knight to the king” Aidan watched as Kalina stood and looked into his eyes. He could not believe the 'boy' who threatened his life because of a simple act stood before him, not just a knight but his knight. And that was some he could smile at, something he could happily die knowing.
-This is the last part of the book. Although the two show romantic feelings for each other in the entire story the two never hit it of. With this as an ending I want to know if you would want another book
Thanks for all the help guys/girls I will fix it up and write some more on these two. Also sorry about giving a possible ending away. I wasn't sure if it would make a good pause point or not. Also you can read about Kal and Aidan along with a lot of other interesting and high spirited characters from their story at textnovel.com - A Knight of Courage by Elspeth.
Thanks again:)
I haven't read anything else by you yet, but I liked this 
I like medieval stuff a lot. I liked your dialogue, but there were many grammatical mistakes.
I'll point out a few things I would change:
Until the day you are not honorable to your people.
“I shall, even with the cost of my life.” Aidan shuttered for a moment with the thought of Kal dying.
Hi there! A quick review for you!
I spotted numerous grammar errors throughout this piece, for example:
“Will you always speak of truth.” Kal’s heart skipped
“I shall sir.”
“Will you in courage charity upon the rich, even with the cost of your title.”
“Then as king of Brenmawr, I Aidan Diarmid Ewan Abimelech dub thou high knight of Brenmawr and second knight to the king” Aidan watched as Kalina stood and looked into his eyes.
Why even bother showing us the end, without everything else? It defeats the point of... pretty much anything I can think of. I can't really express preference for a book if I don't know anything. A short summary isn't going to cut it. I don't feel attached to any of these characters, the epic ending is lost on me. Post a chapter or three, this isn't going to get you anywhere.
That said, this is in the green room, so I'd best help clear it out.
There is a distinct lack of punctuation marks here.
“Will you always speak of truth.” Kal’s heart skipped - needs a question mark, and possibly needs a 'beat' after that. Further, speaking of truth is not correct. Speaking of the truth is, or simply 'will you always speak truth'. Needs a question mark too.
"“Will you be loyal to your king." needs a question mark. Without it I always think of a very deadpan or rhetoric question, not a solemn oath.
The question mark goes for pretty much every question the king asks actually. Overall it's an ok speech, nothing special. See above for my thoughts on this.
Cheers
-Ita
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