Young Writers Society

Home » Roleplay Main » Roleplays » Storybook Sanctuary

Walking in a YWS Wonderland



User avatar
395 Reviews



Gender: Female
Points: 25677
Reviews: 395
Sat Dec 04, 2021 2:10 am
View Likes
Seirre says...



Seirre hesitantly began typing a post. The combined chaos of haikus, coffee, and chicks, along with the incessant beeping coming from the testy microwave, was making their head spin. They were also rather disoriented, as from the sounds of it in @SilverNight's post this cabin was spontaneously growing hallways like limbs.

"So? Who's feeling up to the challenge?" The microwave buzzed impatiently.

"CAN'T. HEAR YOU." @Carina shouted, hands clamped firmly over her ears while she spun in circles. If Seirre had to sum up the general aura Carina had while doing this, she would probably use this gif:
Image


"Do you know why she's doing that?" @FireEyes asked Seirre, speaking at a perfectly normal volume because, newsflash, the microwave was beeping at a perfectly normal microwave volume and was not nearly as loud as Carina seemed to believe.

"Why WOULDN'T she be doing that?" @veeren scoffed.

"..." Seirre punctuated.

I think we're getting a bit sidetracked, Seirre. The rap battle? Remember?

Seirre looked around suspiciously, trying to find the narrator. @HarryHardy must have let the narrator loose, she thought, shaking her head. Still, the narrator did have a point. Rap battle. Not exactly Seirre's forte, but since they had done literally nothing to help out with the haiku fiasco, it seemed only right that they give this a shot.

"Okayyyyy," Seirre let out an exhale. "Wait, first - could I get like, popcorn? Instead of hot chocolate? I mean, considering you just kind of vaporized out of thin air it seems reasonable that you could supply us with a snack upon request, right?" Seirre looked sideways at Harry and Silver. Maybe this whole hot chocolate thing was crucial to the plot. Just have the microwave give an appropriately unsatisfactory and ambiguous answer, the narrator suggested. Good suggestion, narrator.

"Depends on how much I like your rapping," the microwave responded, adequately unsatisfactory and ambiguous.

Seirre pursed their lips. Here goes.

You're askin' for a rap battle so a rap battle I'll do -
fight you to metaphorical death, 'til we're out of breath and blue.
Think you can intimidate us with your feeble buzzes and beeps?
Well too bad for you I could do this all day, yeah, I'd do this in my sleep.
So shut your mouth and open your door and give us the hot cocoa, please,
and maybe we'll give mercy and not make any more puns about cheese.


Seirre raised her eyebrow at @ShadowVyper across the room, but they just smirked back and mouthed "I beg to disa-brie."

"Speaking of BRIE," @Atticus interjected, because apparently he could read lips and had conveniently been reading Shady's lips at that exact moment, "Frisbrie!" He chucked a frisbee that was covered in rainbow mashed potatoes through the room. It went straight through the far window's glass, not leaving a single crack behind.

"Huh," @Hkumar said, furrowing his eyebrows. "Magical frisbee. In a tagbook. Who would've thought."

"Frisbrie", Atticus muttered under his breath.

Once again, Seirre, this post become increasingly non-sequitur. Ooh fancy word, narrator. I frankly don't know if you even used it right, but like, go off. Why don't you wrap things up with a semicoherent ending that the next person can actually build something semicoherent off of? Yeah, yeah, okay. Roger that.

Seirre gestured grandly around the room and then raised a megaphone to their mouth, which they had conjured out of thin air. (The megaphone, not their mouth.) "Well, folks, who would like to take on the microwave next?"
u make me go wat cuz u so wat n u can always go what around u watcha

--SpiritedWolfe


< they/she >
  





User avatar
217 Reviews



Gender: Female
Points: 7300
Reviews: 217
Sat Dec 04, 2021 4:17 pm
View Likes
Liminality says...



There was a perfectly good reason why Lim hadn't taken on the couch's challenge of haiku. It was because the couch was scary.

Now, a microwave was something she could deal with.

The beeps had gotten faster. Even faster than @Magebird liking a post.

Microwave, I don't mean any disrespect, but
are you sure you really know what a rap battle is?
*BEEP BEEP*
'Tis the night before Christmas, and all through this house
we've got writers, we've got poets, we've got enough to rouse
a @PenguinAttack - but wait, that's not what Christmas is about,
it's the season of giving, and you just sit and pout.

What kind of grinch makes human beings compete for a drink?
Is it a big green meanie? Or a metal cabinet that stinks?
Your rap battle's one-sided, you didn't even try it,
you let @Seirre's verse go by and didn't even reply it.


Lim had no idea if putting tags in the rap verse was a good idea, but maybe ideas didn't matter because this sentence was running away from her anyway.

The narrator caught the sentence and threw it back into her face.

Liminality takes 1 damage.


"Hey, since when could the narrator get involved in action scenes?" cried @SilverNight.

"Since just now, apparently," said @atlast with a shrug.

The microwave was silent.

@alliyah was busy conducting her chickens in a coordinated dance to support the rap battle, while @4revgreen was on the drums.

"Is the microwave going to actually rap in this scene?" @rida asked. "Or is it just going to sit there?"

We don't know.

"How can you not know?" Lim looked up at the ceiling, as though that was where the narrator was. The narrator wasn't there.

The narrator was not omniscient. Liminality should have known this by now, given that she'd been taught it a gazillion times.

"Oh! Gazillion! That's a nice one." @ShadowVyper wrote that down, preparing for their next post, where they hoped to mention a gazillion fishes.

Liminality takes 2 damage.

Meanwhile, @Arcticus was trying to coax what he believed was a shy microwave. "Come on, rapping's not that hard. So long as you write something in iambic pentameter or ten syllables, it's perfectly rappable just on it's own!"

4revgreen began to drum harder.

"The sound of thunder --
will somebody rap in tune,
this @EternalRain?"

Lim said beseechingly. "Ah. I just said a haiku."

"Wrong competition!" @FireEyes shouted. "I need that cocoa! Is the microwave going to rap back, or what?"

Find out on the next episode of . . . Epic Rap Battles of things that never happened!
  





User avatar
887 Reviews



Gender: Non-binary
Points: 24046
Reviews: 887
Sat Dec 04, 2021 10:50 pm
View Likes
ShadowVyper says...



Gazillion, yes. They would definitely figure out how to work it into this crackbrain post.

Shady was impressed by both @Seirre's and @Liminality's spontaneous raps -- they were much better than whatever stupid rap the stupid microwave would come up with. Shady was, however, looking forward to seeing more entries. It wasn't going to be from them, however. They'd done their due diligence with the haikus.

"I respekt ur Kraft, Sierra Mist," Shady said. "And yours too, Lim! It's always gouda hear ur sick rhymes."

"You've got to be running out of cheese puns by now," @InuYosha cried.

"Not at all!" Shady disagreed. "This is in the chaotic realm of storybook land. I can make this plot as hole-y as I like."

@myasir99 threw their hands in the air. "Argh! I'm leaving."

Shady looked at them. "I swiss you the best!"

"Are you ever going to stop???" @myasir99 all but begged.

"I wish they would," @AriesBookworm said. "That would be the best queso scenario."

"Ayeeeee!" Shady pointed their fingerguns at them. "Nothin' can get cheddar than this!"

They still weren't sure why they were being so persistent with the puns, when it was so painful for them personally to endure the obnoxiousness they were inflicting upon everyone else. And, yet, they'd set this tone, so they were gonna roll with it.

"I've be so prov-alone without you guys," @Col3 said.

"Are you going to at least attempt the rap battle, Shady?" @MissGangamash asked, desperately trying to re-direct the conversation and give this post one last chance at redemption.

"No," Shady answered.

"Loserrrrr," @PoetryMisfit booed. "You have to at least try."

Shady scrolled down the list of Googled cheese puns they were shamelessly stealing. "Okay, okay -- what about: Y'all gon' make me lose my rind. Up in here. Up in here."

"Wait, wait, TIME OUT," @HarryHardy said, breaking the forth wall as he stared directly into the camera. "Can we have Shady removed from the premises? They don't deserve a Winter Wonderland."

Hrm, well, um... The narrator hummed. I think that's against the rules. I mean, don't get me wrong, I'm all for it. They do deserve to be removed from this RP for their absolutely terrible contributions.

"RUDE!" Shady mozzer-YELLA-d.

"You are truly getting out of hand," the couch said, creeping around the corner to peer inside with the eyes that had mysteriously appeared on its armrest.👁️👄👁️It threateningly brandished one of its rainbow-mashed-potato-covered cushions. "You can't use them in dialogue tags."

"...Okay, fair enough," Shady said, deciding not to tempt fate and get another potato walloping.

"Okay, fine, but if you're going to stay," Harry said. "You have to do a rap battle."

"No." Shady said, continuing to ignore the laws of grammar in order to make their point.

"Yes."

"No." Shady crossed their arms and shook their head. The pocket fish pulled itself up to the side of the cup -- like the fish from Cat in the Hat -- and crossed its fins and shook its head too.

"You have to," Harry pestered.

"No, I don't," Shady said. "You are not an acrimonious couch--"

Shady the narrator sighed loudly. "We've been over this..."

"Hey, now!" Shady protested. "I learned that word for my SATs. It's valid."

The narrator narrowed its eyes, even though Shady still couldn't see it and was in fact telling rather than showing.

"Anyway," Shady turned back towards Harry. "You have no potato leverage over me."

"Oh, well, if that's all it takes." Harry whipped out the biggest Nerf gun Shady had ever seen in their entire life. Harry loaded a large cartridge of rainbow mashed potatoes into it, then pointed it directly at Shady.

"The coercion that I am writing for myself into in this tagbook," Shady grumbled. The pocket fish handed them their cell phone. "Fine. I'm going to do research."

They opened up Wikipedia to look up the rules of engagement for a rap battle.

It didn't help.

They decided to put their world renowned Googling skills to use to figure out how to even go about rapping in the first place.

"Try WikiHow!" @vampricone6783 shouted excitedly.

It was a good suggestion.

@Big Brother started playing a rap playlist to get Shady in the right headspace.

Shady thought for as embarassingly long moment, then started their rap as @akanbright and @JoyDark, started beatboxing.

I guess a rappin's gonna happen, whether I like it or not
So here comes my mad rhyme, I'll drop it like it's hot
This scrap metal thinks its some rhyme genie
But its nothin' but a big old meanie
Ain't no one scared of a little appliance
And you ain't gonna mess with our alliance
We're gonna rise up in defiance
And get our cocoa through self-reliance


Shady coughed awkwardly at the end. "... that was terrible, but... yeah."

"Omg I love it," @Seirre said. "It's actually not awful."

"No," @StellaThomas argued. "That was painful is what that was."

"It really was," @TheMulticoloredCyr agreed.

"Blame Harry, I did it under duress," Shady said.

"That doesn't excuse that nonsense," @Dreamy said.

"Yes, you're definitely on the naughty list now for that one," @SantaYWS grumbled.

"Even I don't want to be associated with you," the pocket fish said, swimming to the very bottom of the cup so that they'd be out of view.

@EternalRain laughed.

Shady decided that the mockery had gone on long enough, and that they weren't going to obey the rules of this stupid rap battle -- they weren't a lawful, afterall, and this was making their chaotic nature trend towards evil.

They grabbed a bag of mini marshmallows and began pelting the microwave.

"Here, these will be more effective." @LizzyTyler handed Shady a bag of jumbo marshmallows instead.

"Ooooh, those are the s'mores marshmallows!" @TheWordsOfWolf shouted excitedly.

"Snaccccs?" @FireEyes sprinted into the room. "FINALLY! The whole reason I'm here!"

@tweezers crawled out of the freezer with this energy:

Image


"How did you fit in there?" Shady turned towards him with a concerned expression.

"Shh, don't question it, just accept it."

Shady shrugged. "Fair 'nuff." They had a marshmallow in their hand, and wasn't sure what to do with it. So they threw it at chi, making it bounce off his nose, but then he fell to his back with surprising speed, unhinging his jaw to swallow the marshmallow whole.

"... That is horrifying," @Myre commented. "And yet I can't look away."

Chi jumped back to his feet and held his hands out, palms up, and laughed maniacally. Hershey chocolate bars began raining from the ceiling, creating a sea of chocolate around everyone's feet. Then @BhavyaMehta123 jumped from the rafters as well, landing on top the mountain of chocolate and began throwing graham crackers like throwing stars at everyone.

@YourFriendQuirks08 used their super secret ninja skills to collect all the ingredients and yeeted them in the toaster oven.

"Mmmm, s'mores," the toaster oven said with this expression: 😊 "I love making people happy."

"See?" Shady said, turning towards the microwave with a pointed look. "That's what a good appliance and is why your mom loves the toaster oven more."

"Harshhhhhhhhh," @stygianmoon17 said. "But, accurate."

The microwave wave went ☹️ and then 😠. "That's it! You can never have the cocoa now!"

Shady had had enough. "We'll see how spicy you are without power." They stormed forward and grabbed the plug, trying to yank it out of the wall.

The ironing board rushed forward and grabbed both of Shady's arms and jerked them behind their back. "No you don't!"

"Yes, I do!" Shady exclaimed.

The iron wrapped its cord around Shady's legs.

"You'll rue the day!" Shady shouted as the iron and board began dragging them towards the door. "RUE I TELL YOU."

The ironing board dragged them into the closet. The door slammed, marking a dramatic end of the post.

.
.
.

Ahem! the narrator said after an awkward pause. Aren't you forgetting something?

The closet door opened.

Shady and the ironing board both leaned out. "Wot?"

A gazillion...

"OH! RIGHT!" Shady exclaimed. "A GAZILLION FISH! I DEMAND IT."

"Shady, do you have any idea how impractical that demand is?" @bees scoffed. "We have 4,269,420 chocolate bars in this kitchen. There is no room for a gazillion fish."

"Okay, but, consider: Paedocypris," Shady said.

"No one has any idea what that is, you nerd," @Atticus scoffed. "You're the only one who has ever cared about icyhthyohology."

"It's the tiniest fish on the planet. Literally," Shady said. "Only 8-12 mm."

Image

"Hmmmm," @Omni said.

Image

"BUT," Omni qualified. "Only the 8 mm ones. Not 12."

"Hmm." Shady frowned. "Fine. Deal."

"Why would you possibly consider giving them a gazillion fish?" a hanger grumbled.

"Bc I'm worth it, obvi," Shady scoffed.

You know what? I have an idea. The narrator boomed omniously. A moment later the hallway turned into an olympic sized swimming pool, filled with a gazillion tiny fish. Then the narrator yeeted Shady into the pool as well.

Shady giggled like a maniac and began doing a backstroke through the sea of fish. "I'M SWIMMING WITH DA FISHES!!!!"
"ur already a big kid scientist in my eyes" - veersies
"u and rina are systematically watering down the grammar of yws" - Atticus
"A fish stole my identity. I blame shady" - Omni

[they/she]
  





User avatar
10 Reviews



Gender: None specified
Points: 3800
Reviews: 10
Wed Dec 08, 2021 6:35 am
View Likes
Big Brother says...



Big Bro wasn't quite sure how they got wrapped into this SB, but they weren't going to argue, considering all the potato violence that they'd witnessed up to this point. It seemed safest just to play along. The microwave was clearly sus and even the couch seemed shady -- which, speaking of which, why was @ShadowVyper swimming around in a sea of tiny fish? Big Bro wasn't surprised. Just disappointed. Much like Shady's mom.

"ROOD!" Shady shouted, flipping over to do a breast-stroke across their sea of fish so they could glare at their beloved Big Bro. "I mean, accurate. But ROOD!"

Just be grateful you get to stay in this RP, the narrator narrated. Expulsion isn't off the table.

"ur mom isn't off the table," Shady said, not above making 'your mom' jokes.

"See, this is why we should remove Shady from this RP," @HarryHardy said, again staring directly into the void that contained you. Yes, you. As you read this post. From the void.

"I think so, too," @Magebird said with a nod.

"Me three!" @alliyah agreed, stroking her chicken as she tip-toed along the fish pool and wondered where Shady had disappeared to. Off to cause mischief, no doubt. She only hoped there wouldn't be too much chaos whenever they reappeared.

"hey dont b hatin on my bae!" @Carina shouted, appearing out of nowhere as Big Bro attempted one last time to bait her into replying to this SB. "Shady's the chaos queene, they get to wreak as much chaos as they want."

"Yeah!" Shady surfaced -- but only their head. The rest was still covered in fish. "The chaos goddess has spoken." With that, they disappeared once more.

@Liminality watched it unfold, also perplexed by where Shady was vanishing to, yet again. They looked at @IcyFlame, and they both shrugged, having no ideas that could possibly come close to explaining Shady's erratic behavior.

Image

@Seirre commented, striding forward to encourage the chaos, as they were apt to do.

Shady's hand appeared above the sea of fish, holding a cup out to them. Beneath the surface of fish you could barely hear them garble, "i like u, have a pocket fish."

Seirre beamed and took the cup that Shady bestowed upon them, hugging the pocket fish close to their chest as they reveled in the honor of having the second-ever pocket fish.

"I think it goes in your pocket," @Mea whispered, concerned that Seirre didn't, in fact, understand the concept of pocket fish.

"Yeah!" @winterwolf0100 agreed, nodding encouragingly. Winter pointed at Seirre's pocket and mouthed. "In. In the pocket."

"excus u," @soundofmind cut in with a scoff. "do u rly think Shady would ever bestow a gift with rules? that's rookie chaos. gotta get those chaos numbers up."

A pocket fish whizzed through the air and spontaneously landed in sound's pocket. She smiled, petting its head. "whats ur name, smol fren?"

"@Omni," the fish squeaked. "I liked them so I stole their name."

"Seems legit," @SpiritedWolfe commented.

"I buy it," @bees said with a nod.

"Hey, no fair!" @Rook cut in with a scowl. "I want a pocket fish."

Shady surfaced again. "We share a deep Connection. I bestow a pocket fish uponst thee as well."

"At this point, you may as well give everyone a pocket fish," @Plume grumbled.

"Yeah, it's not special if everyone gets one," @MailicedeNamedy agreed. "It's a simple matter of supply and demand. You see, if there is a higher supply than there is--"

"I SEE NO PROBLEM HERE : D " @Spearmint cut in with a broad grin, excited at the prospects of owning a pocket fish of her very own.

"Hey, mint! Could you draw me an avvie that has a pocket fish on it?" @AvantCoffee asked.

"Me too!" @BrumalHunter agreed eagerly.

"Guyssss," @Carlito said, trying to be the big kid that actually progressed the plot. "Let's all draw our attention back to the current conflict that is preventing our main characters--"

"Us!" @EternalRain clarified, in case anyone in the audience didn't grasp that from the context clues.

"-- from reaching their goals," Carli finished.

"That is a classic plot arch," @Atticus confirmed.

"So... what now?" @ScarlettFire asked.

"We need to rally around the current conflict: the cocoa coercion," @JustPerks said with a nod.

"Hey, wait a minute, are you tagging mods only so that you don't psyche anyone else out by getting tagged by @Big Brother?" @niteowl asked, distracted from the main plot. It was rather easy to be distracted, considering the sea of fish flopping nearby.

"#Classified," Big Bro answered cryptically.

"Hey! That's my job!" @Meshugenah and @BluesClues protested at once.

"Ya snooze ya loose," Big Bro taunted.

"Okay, but for real, the cocoa's gonna get cold if we don't get it soon," @Panikos said.

"Okay, fine," @GrandWild said, stepping forward to single-handedly advance the plot. She bent down and grabbed a fist full of fish. "We'll just pelt the microwave with thousands of tiny fishes until we bully it into opening."

@Liberty and @Holysocks and @veeren all bent down and scooped up arms full of fish.

"Hey, wait a minute, didn't you say you were only tagging mods?" @Hannah asked.

Image

Big Bro whispered.

"You can't exclude the Chaos Nana King from the chaos," @StellaThomas agreed.

"Okay, but the real question here," @Snoink said, scooping up an arm full of fish and pushing to the front of the crowd. "Will this plan actually work?"

"idk, you gotta ask @SilverNight," @Elinor said. "She's the only one that's actually got a plan for this microwave mishap... at least... I hope she has a plan. This seems to be a major plot point."

Image

the narrator asked.

"PELT FISH GO NOW!" @starlitmind said eagerly, not waiting for a response. With that, they all began pelting the microwave with thousands of fish as they waited to hear the verdict of whether it worked or not.
  





User avatar
49 Reviews



Gender: Female
Points: 393
Reviews: 49
Wed Dec 08, 2021 2:25 pm
View Likes
TheWordsOfWolf says...



as always WordsofWolf was confused. She was somewhat comforted by the sight of her friend @WrenZorya and thought perhaps @BornToBeGreat would know what was going on but that all changed when the fire nation attacked.
  





User avatar
2875 Reviews



Gender: Male
Points: 301545
Reviews: 2875
Thu Dec 09, 2021 8:01 am
View Likes
HarryHardy says...



Harry let out a yawn and went to wipe his eyes. A large NERF gun whacked him in the face. He suddenly realized he was surrounded by water filled with quintillions of tiny fish, a lot of chocolate and some other things he couldn't remember from the posts ab...I mean..sorry he meant the events above...ahem..that took place earlier.

Harry is demonstrating a clear lack of knowledge in the ability to use first person Oh now you come back. You've been terrorizing everyone but you can't help coming back in here can you? Where even is here? Touché

Harry floated above the chocolate and fish and everything else. @ShadowVyper had certainly gone all out for that rap battle. @tweezers @Omni and @bees were all working very hard on a whole myriad of snacks as well. In other words it was a tagbook...ahem..controlled chaos. Or as the SCP foundation would probably term it, and XK-Class end of the world scenario. There were certainly enough anomalies here for it to be a foundation site. A poetic couch, a beatboxing microwave, a few other appliances and equipment that had appeared out of nowhere and the cabin itself was a massive spatial anomaly to say nothing of the giant pool of fish.

Harry frantically wrack his brain for some sort of idea to resolve this conflict. The fish pelting had been quite the move and he was woefully unprepared to deal with *cough* and the super eloquent plan that @SilverNight had planned had totally accounted for it and time taken was only due to needing to consult the thousand page guide on said plan Better

Harry decided the only way around this was to summon more kitchen appliances. The microwave, in what was sure to be a painful plot twist was not amused with getting bathed in fish and so decided to immediately vanish in a flash of light taking the cocoa with it, eliciting multiple groans of disappointment from @GrandWild @alliyah and several others. Will they run into cocoa again? Only time would tell. And by that he means he has no idea at all Narrator we've talked about this And we'll keep talking it appears... Great. Harry had no idea if you could roll your eyes in your thoughts while talking to a seemingly incorporeal entity but he managed it somehow

Taking a page out of @MaybeAndrew 's book, he immediately cleared his windows clipboard. He hadn't meant for that to be literal. Tagbook chaos magic was starting to already take its toll. A toaster appeared moving as silently as the assassins in @FlamingPheonix 's stories and immediately jumped into the spot that the microwave had been at.

The fishies at this point had all miraculously managed to manage to fit into @ShadowVyper's pockets. It was a grate move. The infestation continues. Move away from it immediately. That's a brie--lliant idea. Oh dear.

The chocolate was being vanished by @Spearmint using some delightful rainbow drawing magic because chaos magic was starting to get a little bit overused at this point.

Once the area was sufficiently clear of the general clutter, the toaster presented its challenge. Like any good villain in a story, the toaster knows to wait for the protagonists to be in an ideal position to respond to a challenge. I honestly don't think I should try to stop you at this point. I win

The toaster loudly announced its intentions. "This cabin has been locked down until you complete all the challenges. You marginally beat the couch, technically defeated the microwave but now you must face me. I challenge you all to sandwich as many bread puns as you can in to a monologue and tell me how awesome I am."

That is a rather vain toaster Its certainly sounding a bit kneady. And so it begins
Stay Safe
The Prince of Darkness


Never give up hope no matter what. A battle that you turn up to is a battle that you've already started to win.


Catchphrase loading. Please Wait...
  





User avatar
583 Reviews

Supporter


Gender: Female
Points: 2856
Reviews: 583
Fri Dec 10, 2021 1:09 pm
View Likes
Magebird says...



Things had gone from very confusing to very terrible very fast and Mage was very, very terrified right now. Even though she was physically in the cabin the entire time the great rainbow potato incident, microwave incidents, and fish incidents had all been occurring and had said a few things here and there, she wasn't really mentally there. She hadn't really been there mentally since midterms, technically, but something about the toaster's threat made the long lasting physiology and physics brain fog all fade away.

(Or maybe that was because in another universe not quite adjacent but also not quite parallel to this one, the Mage typing up a tagbook post had just finished her finals.)

Fourth wall breaks aside, Mage just really wanted some hot chocolate. And her brain had been so brain-foggy that she hadn't been able to get it before the microwave went wild and the toaster decided it wanted to be the big bad, so now she was standing soaking wet in a hallway with an egotistical toaster asking for puns.

"Oh dough," Mage said, "I hate puns."

"You have a pun tag on Tumblr," @SirenCymbaline said, popping out from around the corner with her latest sewing design in tow.

"That you regularly post in," @soundofmind added.

"I'm not the one baking the puns," Mage argued. "I just show off other people's creations."

"You're making puns right now-" @JoyDark said, only to be interrupted by Mage further lamenting the tragedy of this whole situation.

"I'm toast," she said. "I'm never going to get my hot chocolate. And I really thought today was going to be butter than this."

"But you're making puns right now," @fuzzysoup, who had only just arrived at both the cabin and the site and was probably very confused by all of the shenanigans, said—echoing JoyDark's point.

She won't listen to reason, the narrator said. Just give up trying to convince her.

Which, if Mage had been paying more attention and not craving so some sweet, sweet warm hot cocoa, would have made Mage question who the narrator even was in the first place, and why they were so involved in these cabin shenanigans. Maybe, just maybe, she would have thought that the narrator was trying to keep her distracted by her chocolate troubles so she didn't ask way too many questions about the tagbook's plot.

But, for now: there was a toaster that needed some ego-stroking, and Mage just knew she wasn't punny enough to do it.
mage

[ she/her ]

roleplaying is my platonic love language.

icon by artstros!
  





User avatar
1079 Reviews



Gender: Female
Points: 133554
Reviews: 1079
Fri Dec 10, 2021 11:57 pm
View Likes
alliyah says...



When the RP mods @SilverNight @Omni @HarryHardy & @winterwolf0100 had casually pitched the idea of a magical winter-cabin getaway alliyah had thought it sounded like a good idea, and when @Elinor had gotten a mysterious phone-call confirming they had won a mysterious prize and that all of YWS had won entrance to a free cabin and all that they needed was @BigBrother's social security number and credit card info it sounded almost too good to be true, however she had grossly underestimated the chicken accommodations at such a cabin. To be fair, ever since she had given out 60+ chickens for Christmas in July it was becoming quite a task to keep out with all the chicken activity. Anyways, the point of this intro is that alliyah was now looking for her lost chickens because she wanted to find all of them so that they could take part in a Christmas Choir Spectacular Chicken Show for the winter cabin talent-show that she had heard rumors of. They'd been practicing the better part of autumn for their debut, so it was important everything go well. alliyah had heard that @Plume was going to bring some crows that were trained in acrobatics and that even @Carina had been practicing a special dance number that involved some sort of banana costume. The talent was going to be the very highest YWS had to offer, so alliyah wanted to be sure she and the chickens were ready.

As alliyah was running frantically around the cabin looking for her misplaced chickens she heard some sick-beats being given by @Seirre, @ShadowVyper, and @Liminality and muttered to herself a few bars while looking for more chickens~

looking for my chickens
but i can't seem to find them
gotta wear a hat and some mittens
cuz it's chilly in this cabin.

I'll take a cocoa break with Mage (@Magebird)
but I'll pass on the microwave fish stew
you know I lost the rest of my lyric page
so I guess you're going to miss out on verse two.


The Narrator was nodding along and snapping at even intervals to make up for the rough syllable variation and alliyah did a quick bow as she ended her verse.

As she entered the cabin library she saw it had been conveniently set up as Holiday Headquarters with all the Holiday Activities being organized together. @ForeverYoung299, @soundofmind, @Liberty, and @RandomTalks were exchanging yearbooks to sign. While @Spearmint asked @dancingontheclouds and @starlitmind to divulge their hopes, dreams, and secret ambitions so they could be arranged in a striking and artful holiday avvie. Several users were 50,000 words deep into their YWS Best and Most Awards acceptance speeches.

In the middle @ChesTacos was standing on a podium waving to a crowd of Squills reporters who wanted an interview from the latest Featured Member.

alliyah had been hopeful she'd find a chicken or two in this room, or at least a sighting of @SantaYWS but so far, no luck! Just as she was turning around, @LadyMysterio called out her name, "hey! are you looking for chickens? I think I found something..."

alliyah turned around again and a large curtain dropped revealing chickens walking into ... a UFO?

Image

and next to them Big Brother had a rather dazed appearance and was mumbling something about microwaves, dishwasher poetry, and classified... alliyah wasn't sure what to make of this so she called @Rook on her YWS phone and took a couple pictures for a Squills article she was working on to reveal the evils of classified. This wasn't the time to write articles though, so she gathered up her chickens in her arms to stop them from flying away in a UFO and decided now was a good time to get some holiday treats in the kitchen before looking for the rest of the chickens to begin practice for their Caroling / Dance number for the talent show.

In the kitchen @BluesClues offered up some holiday nachos, @Arcticus had an entire plate of butter, @ReviewBuddy ran out of the room with the only plate of holiday cookies, and predictably @TypoWithoutCoffee was at the coffee machine. alliyah made a mental note to tell @Meshugenah that because they had gotten such a good deal on their venue for this year's Holiday Party, they ought to be able to increase the food budget next year. alliyah munched on some nachos, while her most beloved chicken Herschel discussed some of the more complicated dance elements on their talent-show piece, and alliyah made a quick doodle to log the events of the day to also serve as a summary for anyone who didn't want to read this very long post.

Image

alliyah laid her head down on the table about to take a quick nap, when a suddenly a few new YWSers @D @BetterThanChesTacos @AutumnWhisperer @lettertoforever @Col3 came up to alliyah and tapped her on the shoulder. "Uh sorry, no autographs right now, I'm a bit tired" alliyah said dismissively, D blinked a couple times then said they were just going around to collect email-contacts. alliyah laughed to herself wondering if this was a scam but hoped they had good intentions. she quickly wrote her PM address and then dozed off to get some rest before the upcoming talent show.
i can't love you if you don't know the difference between teal & dark cyan
&
you should know i am a time traveler
&
there is no season as achingly temporary as now

  





User avatar
99 Reviews



Gender: Female
Points: 10610
Reviews: 99
Sun Dec 19, 2021 6:35 pm
View Likes
SilverNight says...



“Come on, people,” Silver said. “We knead more people doing this!”

“That’s such a crummy pun,” @tweezers said. “For real?”

“I think you mean… a crumb-y pun!” Silver cackled.

The kitchen was judgmentally silent, except for the distant sound of @alliyah’s chickens practicing their rehearsal and @ShadowVyper gleefully swimming with the fishes. The narrator would like to remind everyone that Silver means that literally, not as an idiom, and that Shady is very much still alive and having the time of their life.

“You know, she has a point and we do have to take action,” @Seirre said after a while. “We’ve been on this puzzle for how long already?”

“Thirteen minutes,” @Magebird said.

“That’s a baker’s dozen!” @soundofmind, @veeren and @Carina shouted in unison, and then they all shared a high-five. It was a bit sloppy, though, because the shape of a hand doesn’t really allow for more than two people high-fiving.

Silver sighed. “We all have to make sacrifices to win this challenge, and if we drive ourselves insane from it, then so be it. Now, who’s got some more buns?”

A groan went up.

“That is so bad that I’m having an allergic reaction,” @FireEyes complained.

“So sorry that it’s getting a rise out of you,” Silver said, making finger guns. “Get it? Bread rises?”

The groans in the kitchen turned into sounds of protest.

“That’s enough!” @Omni shouted. “This has to be enough bread puns! Accept your defeat, toaster!”

The toaster let out a buzz. “My appetite for bread puns is not satisfied. I do not yield.”

“Then there’s only one way to do this,” Silver said.

“More puns?” the toaster asked.

Silver shook her head and reached for the power cord. “Night-night.”

“No!” the toaster shouted, its coils turning red and warm from panic. “You win! Just don’t unplug me!”

“We could have just done that from the beginning and not suffer through all those puns?” @HarryHardy asked. “Wow.”

The narrator knows there will be more opportunities for chaos ahead, however. Silver is not writing it in her post because she got distracted by the hot chocolate that was still in the microwave, so she’s leaving the next challenge open-ended.
  








Of those who say nothing, few are silent.
— Thomas Neill