Young Writers Society

OK, so here it is:
I am writing a vampire novel (i know, i know, collective groan) but it is different than the typical vampire romance.
I think I am calling it either From Darkness to Dawn, or The Darkness Before Dawn. It is hopefully going to be two books, or at least two parts...one titled Darkness, one titled Dawn.
Basically, there are psy vampires...which suck energy from people, rather than blood. Then there are regular vampires. Well, there are two vampires, one of each type, and they grew up together, but now live halfway around the world from each other. I need them to communicate with each other about the main character, who they both know. But i don't know if one should travel to meet the other in person or if there should be some sort of mental vampire esp between the two where they communicate in their minds from their respective homes. Maybe in a dream sequence? This is what I am not sure about. I just realized a fight between them over the main character girl would be the perfect addition to my story, but I'm just not sure how to do it in a way that makes sense. I fear that creating a mental link between two different breeds of vampires would be too illogical and might be a sticking point in the plot.
Thoughts?

Is this in modern day? If it is, then why can't they just use cell phones or Skype like all us non vampires?

If it's not, then what time period does it resemble in our history? Knowing that will help us answer your question better.

That's a good point...it is modern day...well, 2007-now. I guess they could use cell phones...but I kinda envisioned them seeing each other while they communicated, like they would in person or in a dream sequence. Like I wanted to describe their conversation like "'She's mine!' he snarled, with an evil glimmer in his eye." and you just don't get that over a cell phone.

Well, then they could use Skype. It's a video chat system, and it's been around for years, so they could see each other while they talked. They would both just need a computer for that, and an internet connection, if it's possible for them to get those.

To add to this, sometimes the most straightforward option is the best one! Not everything has to be overly complicated or thought out to the point that it confuses the reader. If this is just a conversation about the main character, then @Lareine's idea works wonders.

In fact, if you want to create a comedic scene off of that, you could have one vampire be like "We need to talk. I'll give you a plane ticket, some faked passports, and a dispensable phone that I'll text you the location of the safe house once you land. Take no more than 10 seconds to memorize the address, then discard the phone. Call a cab and tell them to drop you off two blocks away from the location. You'll see a black van that will flash its lights to 'Hakuna Matata' from The Lion King. Walk around the van counter-clockwise twice, and then get in."

And the other one could be like "Yeah, we could do that. Orrrrrr we could just Skype (or insert some other video message system). It's way easier."

You see? Just a simple scene becomes a wonderful comedic opportunity because, instead of going through all the difficulty of trying to be complicated on how they meet, they just use technology.

@Jhinx
YOU.ARE.A.GENIUS.
I love that so much! I am going to play off of that...not taking your actual words, of course. But that idea is just what this serious-ish story needs! Skype it is...with a side of over dramatic vampire flair! hahaah!!!

And for the image I had in my head of one shoving the other against the wall and snarling in his face, I can have him get REAL close to the computer screen and look all creepy-angry and snarl at the other one.

Thanks guys!

No problem!

I can't wait to see it work out like that xD honestly in really serious stories, people sometimes forget that humor is needed. I'd rather read a serious story with some well-placed (and maybe well-needed) humor than a serious story that has none.

In fact, if you haven't thought the characters out completely, you could take this scene and run with it, making one vampire like really old fashioned (both in technology and their views/hatred with humans maybe?) and the other one being much more modern in their views. Just have fun with it!

Ok, I think I need you to be my personal sounding board for this novel. LOL! I started it almost 4 years ago and haven't worked on it in over a year, because I have just been so stuck. My character development is not fully planned and I am having trouble connecting poignant moments/scenes to make a coherent story. This story means a lot to me- it is basically a fantasy version of my actual life, and it is a story that needs to be told. But I have never written anything longer than like 12 pages (fiction, that is).

Alright...I just had an idea that spins off of that! The whole over dramatic plan thing happens, then Skype is suggested, and in the Skype call, when the vamp lunges at the screen and snarls, he actually comes THROUGH the screen (vampire powers...idc how they work, am i right?! haha!) and pins the other one against the wall, and then they fight. LOVE IT!!

From Darkness to Dawn may be an original name, but an even more original name would be From Dusk till Dawn.

@Jhinx
You wanted to know how it turned out. Here is the scene as it is written right now. Please let me know what you think!

As Apollo headed back to Greece on the train, he couldn’t help but ruminate on the last moments he had spent with Lily. He had leaned in, although he wasn’t quite sure what he would have done when he made contact. But instead, he got a big whiff of that scent, that horrid stench that emanates from the body of those marked by a Pranic. And he knew exactly who it was. Damn Ares had gotten to this wonderful girl first! And not only had he met Lily first, but he MARKED her! Lily belonged to Ares. Apollo couldn’t get close to her and claim her for his own, and that bothered him. He had to talk to Ares, as soon as he could.
When Apollo got home, he immediately hit the internet to find the contact information for Ares, which he found after a short search. He sent Ares a message, saying simply “We need to talk. Now. Lily.” He waited with bated breath. He realized that, with the time difference, it would be a few hours before Ares would be awake to see the message, but he couldn’t stop staring at the screen.
Four hours later, a message alert popped up on Apollo’s Facebook page. It was Ares. The message simply gave a phone number. Apollo grabbed his phone with haste and punched the numbers in so hard that the phone almost fell out of his hand.
“Ares.” Apollo snapped.
He heard a sharp, whispered tone, with the faintest hint of Greek accent: “If you insist on speaking about Lily, then I will make arrangements for you to meet me stateside. I will reserve you a plane ticket that leaves in the morning. I’ve already called (greek name) and told him to make you a fake passport. Can’t be too careful. Once you get off the plane in Nashville, at gate (which gate), you will find the nearest bathroom, and in the third stall, in the tank of the toilet, you will find a baggie with a burner phone inside. Pick up the phone and hit redial. Listen to the instructions and follow them to the letter. I will send a car to pick you up at the airport, but you have to ride in the trunk. You will be driven to a safe house, where I will meet you. I will arrive on a horse, wearing a kabuki mask and holding a pitchfork. Then we can talk.”
“Yeah, we could do that. Or, we could just Skype. So much easier.”
“If you insist”
Apollo signed into Skype and waited for the tone to ring. The minute and a half that it took for Ares to call seemed like an eternity. Suddenly, that pale, drawn face that Apollo had tried to forget filled his computer screen.
“What?”
“You marked her. She’s too good for you, but you made it so that I can’t even get close to her. What do you plan on doing with her?! The same thing you did to Desdemona?!”
“No, of course not. This time, I can do it without kissing her. Thank goodness, am I right? She truly is revolting.”
“She’s sweet, and beautiful. Way too good for you. Just like her, my lovely Desdemona. And now you plan to kill again, when she never did anything to hurt you!”
“She looked like she would be fun to play with.”
“You worthless, vile creature!” Apollo screamed and lunged at the screen. To his surprise he passed right through it and slammed Ares against the wall.
“You’re the one who drinks blood, you animal!” Ares spat back.
“You don’t deserve her.”
“She’s MINE” snarled Ares, baring his teeth in an eerie grin.
Apollo pressed his hand against Ares’ throat and held it there as Ares began to choke.
“Don’t try me. I could bite you right now…wouldn’t that be fun! We have no idea what would happen if a sang bits a Pranic.” Apollo spat.
“Then why don’t you? To save your little friend…”
“She doesn’t need saving. She’s stronger than you’ll ever be, you’ll see.”
Apollo let Ares go, and as Ares rubbed his neck, Apollo picked up Ares’ laptop, held the screen above his head, and dropped it, the laptop swallowing him through the screen, and leaving it shattered and sparking on the floor.
“Well he didn’t have to wreck my laptop like that,” Ares muttered, and scooped it off the floor.
Back in Greece:
“Well, that was weird,” mused Apollo. “I didn’t know I could travel like that! Vampire powers, gotta love ‘em.” He shook his head with a half-smile.