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Young Writers Society


GR: Let's Discuss I Have Chosen [...] You As God by amelie



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Tue Feb 07, 2017 10:30 am
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Virgil says...



Welcome back to another week with the Group Review! Not much has passed since last week happened, but we still encourage you to join in on the discussion! If you happen to be a fan of poetry and want to have more discussions, I reccommend joining the Poetry Jams club!

If you don't know the basic premise of the Group Review, each week we take a poem and discuss it together, with the permission of the author, of course. This week's poem is, I have chosen to remember you as god by amelie.

Now that's out of the way, I encourage you to read poem, because, well, if you don't, you won't be able to participate in the discussion. A link to the poem is provided below so you can read it if you choose to join in on the discussion!




A couple of questions to think about when reading and forming your response about the poem, ones that are also good to think about when reviewing in general:

Code: Select all
[b]What are your first impressions of the piece?[/b]
[b]What are your interpretations of the poem? What is the message?[/b]
[b]Which lines are the strongest and why?[/b]
[b]Who do you think the speaker is? The other person that appears in the poem?[/b]
[b]What did you think of the repetition that ran throughout it? Do you think it could have been more consistent?[/b]
[b]In the poem, did anything else stand out to you that wasn't mentioned?[/b]


Again, these are just some suggestions, which means that you don't have to follow them because it doesn't cover the whole conversation that can be had about the piece.

That being said, discuss!

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Sat Feb 11, 2017 6:27 am
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alliyah says...



Here to join the discussion! I'll just go with the suggested questions for this one:

What are your first impressions of the piece?
My immediate impression of the poem is that I feel like I have to like take a step back because it's not immediately clear at all what is happening. I get the impression that the speaker is absolutely enamored with the subject, but that their affection is also a bit unsettling.

What are your interpretations of the poem? What is the message?
I'm going to just take a somewhat wild guess at the meaning, because like I said, I think there's a ton of room for various interpretations in here.

I think that the speaker is in love, and they see their love as positive to be completely devoted to this other person who is literally their world and almost like a god to them. They kind of try to take a step back in stanza 2 when they see that their relationship is destructive. But the speaker isn't able to just forget or walk away from this person, because they are just so important/big/powerful/god-like. They have their issues and yet the speaker can just sweep that away and remember the good times too. Most of all the speaker longs for recognition (the lines about asking to hear the name). The very last lines are interesting because I can't decide if the speaker broke off the relationship at the end. The theme of memory is really important to the piece. Maybe at the end they break it off, and the message is just that we can remember people how we want to but it doesn't change who they are.

I'd be very interested in what other people's interpretations of this piece are.

Which lines are the strongest and why?
I really like the style and language in which the 1st stanza is written. Every line adds a new layer to the initial line, so the reader almost has to continuously re-write what's happening in their head. For instance line 1 is talking about pain in the wrist, and I immediately think this poem is about self-harm, then line 2 comes in and I realize it's a person kind of harming themselves but through a relationship with another person, line three humanizes the other person/subject, while line 4 alienates and otherizes them by making them god-like. Every line is just a new layer that almost contradicts the last one. I think this stanza also has the best flow.

I also have to say I love the lines "I would love to hear what it sounds like / painted on your lips" - great detail!

Who do you think is the other person that appears in the poem?
I took the subject (non-speaker) to not literally be G*d, but to be someone the speaker loves who takes the role of G*d in their life. I really enjoyed the biblical language in the piece with the dry bones & maybe a reference to Abraham or Jesus with the starry night at the end. I would have liked to see even more of that throughout the poem.

What did you think of the repetition that ran throughout it? Do you think it could have been more consistent?
I liked the repetition of the line "I chose..." I would have liked if this had continued into the later stanzas.

There were a few lines that I didn't feel were cohesive with the story/tone of the rest of the poem. One of the lines was in line 7 about "coughing hesitantly". I just didn't know what this added to the stanza, and I felt didn't make sense given the next line is about a very physical and non-hesitant action of "clawing". Overall the word choice seemed cohesive, but there were lines that felt outside of the narrative or progression of events. as well.

In the poem, did anything else stand out to you that wasn't mentioned?
Overall an interesting poem to reflect upon.
you should know i am a time traveler &
there is no season as achingly temporary as now
but i have promised to return
  





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Sat Feb 11, 2017 11:51 am
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Virgil says...



@alliyah See, I'm not one of the people who picked up on the biblical references until I was told, and that's because I haven't delved too far into that myself. I'm sure I could look up the meaning of those since I'm not one who gets them, but I do think it adds something interesting to the poem. I have a similar interpretation of the poem believing that this is romance as well and that the speaker sees this other person as a god-like figure.

In ways that could come off toxic or at least odd, but I don't really think the poem itself does that. It really does depend on how its written and while this poem didn't give me the effect or thought that the speaker thinks they're lower than this other person. Do you think that's a valid thought about the poem/did you ever happen to see that as well?

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Sat Feb 11, 2017 9:02 pm
alliyah says...



I completely agree there @Nikayla - if you take out the stanza about clawing (stanza 2?) it seems like the poem is just about someone who has a little bit of an odd relationship where they just really really like a person whom they think is almost perfect and "god-like" but the 2nd stanza gives me pause with the clawing and such.

I'm not sure how to take the last stanza too with the contrast between the light and the "starry night" maybe between the good and the bad. I think the speaker is conflicted on just what their feelings are towards this person are, which is complicated even further because this is all written analyzing memory. ("I choose to remember"...). It's one thing to say "I like this person" or ''I don't like this person". It's another layer to say "I like/dislike the memory of this person" that's much more complicated - it makes me think there is some disconnect between what's happening and how the speaker feels.
you should know i am a time traveler &
there is no season as achingly temporary as now
but i have promised to return
  








The tools of conquest do not necessarily come with bombs and explosions and fallout. There are weapons that are simply thoughts, attitudes, prejudices; to be found only in the minds of men. For the record, prejudices can kill, and suspicions can destroy. A thoughtless, frightened search for a scapegoat has a fallout all of its own.
— Rod Serling, Twilight Zone