Young Writers Society

Does anyone have any good tips for writing a really compelling synopsis? I find condensing this big exciting story into something that can fit on one page completely cheapens it and removes all of it's charm. The synopsis is one of the most important parts of submitting to publishers - they won't even look at your manuscript unless you have a good synopsis. So I'm kind of stressing over it because I want to get published.

Here's the synopsis I wrote for my finished novel.

Synopsis

Forest Lake is just your average family suburb in hot, muggy Brisbane, and Alexis is just your average fourteen-year-old girl living in it – well, as average as she can be; tomboyish, stubborn, defiant and hot-headed…

That is until Raven turns up and turns her whole life upside-down.

Alexis’ life kind of sucked anyway, with her abusive step-dad, bitchy sister, and a mother who seems to be just getting sick of it all and switching off. Not to mention the boys she was once close friends with who now pick on her, the best friend who she can’t tell anything to because she’d tell the whole school, and the complete lack of any one else in her life.

If all that wasn’t bad enough, then a little boy turned up murdered in the lake and Alexis’ hoodie was at the crime scene, a mysterious figure prowled the suburban roofs at night, a man was stalking her, she was hearing voices, and Raven just turned up naked in the forest and turned into a wolf right in front of her. It was all so surreal that Alexis was almost convinced she was crazy; her best friend sure was.

But none of the supernatural stuff even mattered to Alexis. The one thing that mattered was her mum was missing, yet her sister and step-father didn’t seem concerned one bit. That’s probably because they knew exactly where she was; rotting away in the garden shed, after the step-dad hit her and she accidently fell and hit her head and breathed her last breath.

When Alexis finds out the truth, she’s suddenly homeless and orphaned in a world she no longer understands - in a world where the things that go bump in the night are out to get her. Alexis’ body rips itself apart and unleashes the animal inside of her in an act of self-defence and emotional coping mechanism – she discovers she’s a shape-shifter, descendant from Native Americans, and can take the form of a wolf when the situation calls for it.

She and her new friend, Raven (a self-titled name since she can also turn into a bird), must team up to survive. With no guidance from someone older and more experienced, they don’t know why demons are hunting them, they don’t know how they’re supposed to live this life.

They sleep through the day so the demons don’t get them. At night, they run, run through the darkness, run for their lives. Will they ever see the sun again? Will they ever escape the prevailing darkness? Alexis must turn from being a victim to being a victor if she wants to make it out alive. She can’t run from them forever; one day she must take a stand and fight. And when she does… there will be war.


If you have any feedback for that, that would be lovely. And if you're interested in reading the novel, you can find it here - https://docs.google.com/document/d/13yy ... oGWRQ/edit
Any feedback on that would also be appreciated.

But yeah. Let me know your thoughts on writing a synopsis!

One thing about writing a good synopsis is you kind of have to throw out the mentality that it cheapens the story. Synopses are about the central conflict of the novel and the human element, that answer the question "why should we care?" If you find that "cheap", then you're blocked before you even start.

Condensing a novel is not about what you lose. It's about what you highlight. Everything around a novel is, at its heart, built around a central conflict; your synopsis should be nothing but the human side of that central conflict.

Take the sentence summary I have for my own novel:

Kerani’s sole purpose has always been ensuring the survival of her bloodline, through murder and through marriage, but how far will she go to stop a war that threatens to tear her sister’s empire apart?

And in this sentence, I highlight the main character and her:
- position (bodyguard/noble)
- actions (murders and marries)
- conflict (she'll have to give up something to stop the threat)
- goal (but she feels she has to stop the threat)

The novel itself is how she actually does those things, but the "how" really isn't important at all in a synopsis. Publishers want the why. They want the reason behind everything, and they want a reason to care.

You're not losing anything by cutting the how. The how is all well and good, but it's not exactly all that interesting unless you know the why.

Forget the "literary" aspects, the themes, the giant cast of characters. Those are nothing but side dishes. Your main course is the main character and what they want.

Right now, you're discussing everything around the character instead of the character themselves. Readers don't care about the protagonist's surroundings unless there is a reason to care about the protagonist, and a bad situation is not enough reason.

Talk about Alexis. Talk about what she's willing to do. Forget describing her outside of her goal, forget about all the other traits that help her get to her goal. Hint at what pain she is willing to go through to get her goal.

Also, start with the present instead of the past. The past is another extra that, yes, shapes the character, but, also yes, needs a reason to be cared about. How often do you listen to somebody you've just met, who randomly sat down at your table, talk about their tragic backstory?

It might help to think about it that way, where you ask yourself: what would I listen to a stranger tell me if they sat down at my table at a coffee shop? What's the first thing out of their mouth that gets me to snap out of my own world and want to hear about theirs?

Hope this helps! Feel free to reply if you have any questions.

I have a question! Do you mean Brisbane, Australia or Brisbane, California?

Just wanted to clarify that, cause you don't make it clear and I was under the impression this was set in Australia, and I was going to be like "wait what" because Native American and Australia do not mix. XD And if it is set in Australia, I was going to suggest some local Aboriginal tribes and the possible idea that maybe they turn into dingoes?

Sorry if I'm being a pain. I'm just a little confused over location and would like some context for it.

ScarlettFire wrote:I have a question! Do you mean Brisbane, Australia or Brisbane, California?

Just wanted to clarify that, cause you don't make it clear and I was under the impression this was set in Australia, and I was going to be like "wait what" because Native American and Australia do not mix. XD And if it is set in Australia, I was going to suggest some local Aboriginal tribes and the possible idea that maybe they turn into dingoes?

Sorry if I'm being a pain. I'm just a little confused over location and would like some context for it.

You are quite right, Native Americans and Australia don't usually mix.

But here they do. I do indeed mean Brisbane, Australia.

During World War II many American soldiers came over to help us Aussies out, including Native American soldiers. The soldiers would all go to pubs at night and try to pick up women. There were many war babies who were left fatherless when the soldiers returned to America, or some Australian women went back to America with them.

So, in theory, there's Native American blood in some Australians, and the potential for the Native American "shape-shifting gene" as described in my novel to manifest in Australians.

While this all sounds complicated and you might think why would I bother if I could just use Australian aboriginals and shape-shift into dingoes, well, it's all part of the plot, but I won't explain it all here. It only gets more complicated from there on in (eugenics, selective breeding, prophecies, destiny, etc...)

No, it actually makes sense to me. Thanks for clearing that up!


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On the Native front: you're going to have to be really careful with claiming of identity.

Natives do, indeed, have self identification. But it's not as simple as "I have some Native blood in me." It's a case of "I feel an ache for my culture, I want to go home, I want to be part of the society that was taken from me, I want to take care of the Earth the way my ancestors did."

It is much, much more complicated than "there's some blood in me." If you scroll down to "Reconnecting" here, you'll get a fairly accurate list of what it takes to be part of Native American culture.

I would suggest browsing the Native American tag of that blog, as well, and really being specific about the belief systems you're pulling from. A general "Native American" thing is homogenizing hundreds upon thousands of Native nations, and if I recall correctly, Native soldiers were frequently Navajo, who might not have wolves or ravens (or even shapeshifting) in their mythology.

It's really disrespectful to have just general "Native Americans" without a tribe, and it's also quite disrespectful to have a nation practice magic that is not part of their culture. So you'll have to account for that in your plot to accurately depict Native peoples.

Rosendorn wrote:On the Native front: you're going to have to be really careful with claiming of identity.

Natives do, indeed, have self identification. But it's not as simple as "I have some Native blood in me." It's a case of "I feel an ache for my culture, I want to go home, I want to be part of the society that was taken from me, I want to take care of the Earth the way my ancestors did."

It is much, much more complicated than "there's some blood in me." If you scroll down to "Reconnecting" here, you'll get a fairly accurate list of what it takes to be part of Native American culture.

I would suggest browsing the Native American tag of that blog, as well, and really being specific about the belief systems you're pulling from. A general "Native American" thing is homogenizing hundreds upon thousands of Native nations, and if I recall correctly, Native soldiers were frequently Navajo, who might not have wolves or ravens (or even shapeshifting) in their mythology.

It's really disrespectful to have just general "Native Americans" without a tribe, and it's also quite disrespectful to have a nation practice magic that is not part of their culture. So you'll have to account for that in your plot to accurately depict Native peoples.

Thanks, I'll definitely try and find a specific tribe who have shape-shifting in their beliefs, since I don't want to offend anyone. To clarify, the characters themselves don't self-identify as being Native American, they just kind of go "wow I can turn myself into an animal, that's new". Being a Bachelor of Science student, I've only looked at things from a scientific/genetics point of view without taking much culture into account.

You might want to reconsider the "don't self identify" part, if you're pulling from Native mythology.

Non-Natives appropriating Native spirituality is actually a huge issue, and has been for the past very long while. Not giving them a culture makes it look like you're just pulling from Native spirituality to be "cool", which is disrespectful.

If you don't want to offend the people whose mythology/religion (I misworded my original post— Native American beliefs are living, breathing religions that are still alive to this day) you're representing, you're going to have to have Natives practice it and be the mentors towards new initiates. You should also try to avoid the Magical Native American trope with your characters.

This is why it might be a good idea to reconsider whether or not you're pulling from Native American beliefs in Australia: there simply won't be the community required to properly respect Native American religion and culture. Australian Aboriginals, on the other hand, would exist in large numbers and would provide the community support required to be respectful.

However, I'm not sure Australian Aboriginals have shapeshifting, which means you're either looking at a possible location change (unless there is a Native American community in Australia, somehow, which would have to exist in the real world considering that's part of the suspension of disbelief), a mythology/identity change, or a plot change, depending on which you're the most wedded to.

Rosendorn wrote:You might want to reconsider the "don't self identify" part, if you're pulling from Native mythology.

Non-Natives appropriating Native spirituality is actually a huge issue, and has been for the past very long while. Not giving them a culture makes it look like you're just pulling from Native spirituality to be "cool", which is disrespectful.

If you don't want to offend the people whose mythology/religion (I misworded my original post— Native American beliefs are living, breathing religions that are still alive to this day) you're representing, you're going to have to have Natives practice it and be the mentors towards new initiates. You should also try to avoid the Magical Native American trope with your characters.

This is why it might be a good idea to reconsider whether or not you're pulling from Native American beliefs in Australia: there simply won't be the community required to properly respect Native American religion and culture. Australian Aboriginals, on the other hand, would exist in large numbers and would provide the community support required to be respectful.

However, I'm not sure Australian Aboriginals have shapeshifting, which means you're either looking at a possible location change (unless there is a Native American community in Australia, somehow, which would have to exist in the real world considering that's part of the suspension of disbelief), a mythology/identity change, or a plot change, depending on which you're the most wedded to.

Thank you for your concern and I appreciate the advice, but there's a lot of stuff in the story and its sequels that makes what you've said redundant, such as the main character ends up moving to America and having a Native American shape-shifter mentor her, since she just didnt have that opportunity in Australia, etc, etc. It's just a lot to try to explain properly. I assure you I will handle all aspects of the Native American side of my novel with respect. I just came here to get advice on writing a synopsis, not to be lectured on being ignorant by someone who hasnt even read the novels.

Hey there!

First off, I'll tackle your question with the synopsis here. You're right: A good synopsis is practically required to get published. If the person you're contacting doesn't understand why this story needs to exist (for philosophical or marketing value) from the synopsis, they're probably not going to read much past that unless it has a really, really interesting premise.

The long and short is, the synopsis you send an agent or acquisitions editor is the first thing this person will ever see of your writing. They will see if you can quickly embroil the reader in your characters, world, and the conflict they face that's forcing change upon them. If you can't, then they have no reason to have faith in the finished product.

Let me repeat that: The synopsis is reflective of the finished product.

In the synopsis you've given us, you spend far too much time on the backstory and not enough time on your plot.

Alexis is "not like other girls" (even though plenty of girls are tomboyish and stubborn and completely average to boot). Raven shows up and turns Alexis's life upside-down (how specifically? that's such a vague phrase that has been used so many times for so many different things). Alexis has a vaguely dysfunctional family and toxic friends.

That's three paragraphs (two if I'm generous) of nothing but backstory that we don't need to know right now. Just because it's teen fiction doesn't mean you need to put the teen drama right in the middle of the plate. Get to the interesting stuff, the stuff that makes your plot—the murder, the stalking, the shape-shifting, her mother going missing.

The simple thing is, this is a teen fiction novel. There's going to be teen drama. That's a given. But are you trying to sell the teen drama, or are you trying to sell conflicted teenage shapeshifters who need to confront things ten times larger than life?

Build your synopsis around what you're trying to sell.

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Second off! I'm going to tackle the teensy issue you have with unfortunate implications. Largely, you might be able to tell, this issue comes with you mentioning that the girls are of Native ancestry.

The thing is, it doesn't matter what's in the book right now. I'm just looking at your synopsis, and the way it is handled in your synopsis is on the edge of, well, some pretty bad disrespect.

A couple of innocent questions: Why does it have to be Native genes in the first place? Why can't it just be a non-specific gene that has been passed through multiple cultures over the millennia, instead of tying it specifically to a multitude of cultures that are treated as a monolith already?

And yes, I haven't read the novel. You're right about that. But I'm reading your synopsis, and the synopsis is reflective of the finished product. We're simply concerned that a much-shafted cultural group and identity may be shafted yet again, so please, pardon me for questioning you so much on this, I just don't have the time or energy to sit down and read a novel that's not on my reading list when it's backed up so far to begin with.

Thank you for your patience!

Glad to know I'm wrong!

However, as Lareine says, it's about how you present the information that matters. I gave you some synopsis advice in my first post on the thread, and I'm going to expand on it a little more.

I mentioned how it might help to think about this like a random person sitting down across from you at a coffee shop, and I still stand by that. I would also add that it might help to think of only what's directly relevant to the story they're telling in the order it becomes relevant.

So, you start with that snappy fact that she's wrapped up in a murder she knew nothing about, she goes out to the shed to get some peace, discovers her mother's body and that her dad did it, shapeshifts because she ends up in danger, etc.

And this is where the framing is really, really important. Notice how I put the fact her dad did it only after she discovers the body? That's showing he's a terrible person, instead of telling it (like you have now). By putting the actions he did first, you let readers form their own opinions instead of telling us what to feel.

This is absolutely critical in all writing, putting the horse before the cart. You want to give us the information we need to form our own opinions before giving the MC's reaction, because then we believe the MC's reaction. If you just tell us she hates her dad, then the reaction tends to be "so what?" But "My dad murdered my mom, I hate him" gives readers room to be just as horrified as the MC, and our emotional reaction lines up with hers.

As for how you frame the Native American issue, you hint but don't spell out the lack of culture enough to really solidify how her arc is going to progress. As a result, I made the incorrect assumptions I did; I heard "doesn't self identify" and immediately thought "so why is it there?" and gave the warning. Then you tell me I'm wrong, I'm happy, but now we need to figure out how to reflect that. This is an arc we need some sense of progression on, because it's relevant information and shows you're really building the Native part in in. Something like:

Thrust into an ancestry she knows nothing about, with no mentor and only a raven to guide her, she must learn who she is and how to handle her powers...

That implies there's a broader cultural context, and it introduces a conflict that you resolve in the sequels. Having to figure out something as big as culture and identity sounds interesting.

So you want to do the following really important things, both in your synopsis and your novel:

- Start with something that makes you curious instantly
- Hint at the broader arcs and the conflict therein
- Make sure you give us the actions before telling us how to react

Hope this helps!