z

Young Writers Society


Exploding Beached Whale



Random avatar


Gender: Male
Points: 0
Reviews: 56
Sat May 24, 2014 10:35 pm
Cole says...



For a summer project, I'm writing a story which takes place in a seaside town. Two characters' lives (Creed and Philomena "Poppy") end up converging, resulting in an ironic, tragic love story. All of it is from the perspective of Creed, a handicapped fisherman who is reminiscing his romance with Poppy, an amnesia-stricken girl who was salvaged from the sea and can only remember basic facts about who she is.

A great portion of the story involves Creed trying to come to terms with Poppy's death. However, I'm trying to determine if the manner of her death is actually plausible.

Seen here is a natural explosion caused by the opening of a beached whale's belly (warning, the video is graphic!).

Beached whales, due to the immense pressure of methane gas produced by rotting innards, can actually rupture! I was wondering if this could kill someone standing too close to the whale.

I'm thinking this:

Poppy goes with some fishermen to see a beached whale that was found a little ways down the coast and went unnoticed for weeks. When one of the men attempts to open its belly with a machete, it bursts and a piece of flesh or bone strikes Poppy hard enough to break her neck.

Is this plausible?
  





User avatar
212 Reviews

Supporter


Gender: Male
Points: 13620
Reviews: 212
Mon May 26, 2014 9:24 pm
View Likes
birk says...



I'd say it doesn't sound too plausible. I could buy someone sort of being launched a bit backwards by the initial blast and maybe hitting their head against a wall, landing awkwardly or something.

But then again, she would probably have to be the one to perform the cutting to be within close enough proximity to the blast. A lot of coincidences would have to fall into place.

In my honest opinion, this seems like a very silly way to go out.

Your plot sounds good though. I love stories of the sea and of fishermen.
"I never saved anything for the swim back."


Do not mistake coincidence for fate. - Mr Eko

they're selling razor blades and mirrors in the street
  





Random avatar


Gender: Male
Points: 0
Reviews: 56
Mon May 26, 2014 9:31 pm
Cole says...



I've thought about Poppy, instead, falling backward due to the blast and hitting her head on the rocky shore.

As for this being a "silly" way to go, to me there's some poetic potential about it (I know, I know, it's weird). It certainly hasn't been done before, either!

Thanks for your input.
  





User avatar
494 Reviews



Gender: Female
Points: 0
Reviews: 494
Tue May 27, 2014 10:48 pm
Holysocks says...



If this is a comedy, then yes! I think I would die laughing more than feel sad, or remorse for the fisherman or Poppy ( I'm not trying to be mean ).

There's just nothing romantic about whale blubber flying through the air. The idea of Poppy falling back from the blast and hitting her head is a little better... but still, it's quite a hilarious concept.

I don't find it poetic, sorry. It's almost poetic... and then I remember that we're talking about exploding whales, and I lose it.

Sorry, I personally don't think it could work unless it's suppose to be funny.
100% autistic
  





Random avatar


Gender: Male
Points: 0
Reviews: 56
Wed May 28, 2014 12:36 am
Cole says...



Holysocks wrote:If this is a comedy, then yes! I think I would die laughing more than feel sad, or remorse for the fisherman or Poppy ( I'm not trying to be mean ).

There's just nothing romantic about whale blubber flying through the air. The idea of Poppy falling back from the blast and hitting her head is a little better... but still, it's quite a hilarious concept.

I don't find it poetic, sorry. It's almost poetic... and then I remember that we're talking about exploding whales, and I lose it.

Sorry, I personally don't think it could work unless it's suppose to be funny.


Sounds like this will be a challenge, then, and I accept it!
  





User avatar
494 Reviews



Gender: Female
Points: 0
Reviews: 494
Wed May 28, 2014 4:09 pm
Holysocks says...



XD Have fun!
100% autistic
  





User avatar
440 Reviews



Gender: Female
Points: 6836
Reviews: 440
Sat Jun 14, 2014 3:55 am
View Likes
Wolfi says...



My eighth grade science teacher showed us that video! xD
John 14:27:
Peace I leave with you; my peace I give you.
I do not give to you as the world gives.
Do not let your hearts be troubled
and do not be afraid.
  





User avatar
1220 Reviews



Gender: None specified
Points: 72525
Reviews: 1220
Sat Jun 14, 2014 4:46 am
View Likes
Kale says...



The force of such an explosion is definitely enough to kill someone standing in the way. If you notice, the entire time, the biologist is carefully standing off to the side of where he's cutting. I'll bet you he was also probably thinking something along the lines of "please just vent... please just vent..."

Not to mention all those intestines and that pretty hefty chunk of liver that got shot out. It would've gone farther if the building hadn't been there, as evidenced by how high up the blood on the wall and door is. If you were standing close to the whale and in the path of the explosion, you'd be taking a trip with those entrails.

With that said just "a piece" doesn't sound plausible, as there would be way more than just "a piece" getting ejected. Also, there wouldn't be bone involved in the explosion; just lots of internal organs.

What would be plausible is having Poppy stand too close to the whale when it explodes, resulting in her getting bowled over by flying innards. She could hit her head on a rock and die, or take a chunk of flying liver to the face and snap her neck, or a completely different avenue for tragedy involves the machete the fisherman was using flying out of his hand and impaling Poppy.

Personally, I find the machete scenario the most potentially tragic, since you have the fisherman who cut the whale open having to deal with his actions resulting in a death, as well as how Creed feels about the fisherman.
Secretly a Kyllorac, sometimes a Murtle.
There are no chickens in Hyrule.
Princessence: A LMS Project
WRFF | KotGR
  





Random avatar


Gender: Male
Points: 0
Reviews: 56
Sat Jun 14, 2014 6:29 pm
Cole says...



Thanks for the input, Kyll!
  





User avatar
560 Reviews



Gender: None specified
Points: 30438
Reviews: 560
Wed Jun 25, 2014 12:29 pm
View Likes
Tenyo says...



Eww.
We were born to be amazing.
  








Ghosts, demons, and ghouls cannot scare the cat's underling.
— TheMulticoloredCyr