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The price of love



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Sat Dec 10, 2011 6:47 pm
dogs says...



Hey Everyone so this is actually a piece I submitted to the madness contest thingi. This is really the first short story I have written in a long long time. Anyways this isn't how it ends, I have more to come but I feel like if I add the next part to it it would make this way too long for the contest, so I just have this little "teaser" so to say lol. But just a quick plot update incase you don't understand anything. Etrius is or at least was engaged to Tania. Both of them are in a military base fighting a war, well.... Etrius isn't. Anymore. And this is the price of love. Enjoy!


A helicopter landed at base carrying what’s left of its precious cargo unharmed. Soldiers gathered around and stared in awe, or more shock. Shock for the fact that only one helicopter returned out of the fifteen that left. Soldiers stepped out heavily armed and dripping with blood from the claw marks that scar their skin. Doctors ran forward to attend to the wounded.

“MAKE A HOLE!” some one screams as the doctors as they pushed through the large crowd. Most of the soldiers that had returned from the deathly trip had deep cuts from the claws of the beasts that attacked them. One man collapsed from loss of blood as a swarm of Doctors go to help him. One man had already died from the lack of blood on the helicopter. His corpse lays alone and forgotten. The only two who emerged from the chopper unharmed was the General and Beecher. Beecher walked behind the General and watched him warily as if he was expecting the General to turn on him any moment.

The general was covered in blood but appeared to be unharmed, a doctor came up to him and said “Sir im going to have to ask you to sit down and see if any you have any damage”. The general shoved the man to the ground and continued walking forward wearing an unreadable expression. Never the less every single soldier knew he was furious. Everyone quickly got out of his way, all but one. She stood there, standing tall and stared right at the general. The General immediately tried to avoid her gaze but there was nowhere to hide. No way to hide the truth.

She locked her every watchful gaze on the General’s deceitful eyes and narrowed her eyes. “Where. Is. He. Where is Etrius!” She demanded. The General dropped his eyes and just kept walking passed her. As Beecher followed Tania stopped him and grabbed his arm with an iron grip and stared right into his eyes seeking the truth. Beecher looked down at the floor, trying to keep it all hidden.

Tania tightened her grip “What. Happened” Beecher still stared at his feet and didn’t answer for a long time.

“You don’t want to know” Beecher said quietly

“Oh I think I do,” She said impatiently, increasingly tightening her vice of a grip on his arm.

Beecher sighed and looked up into her eyes. Tears brimmed in his own dark, red, eyes.

“He didn’t make it” Beecher said almost silently. Tania’s eyes widened in horror and anger. But then a single tear rolled down her check, it shined like a light. Shined of pure joy, but then it fell off and her face darkened, last remaining joy drained from her face for forever more. Her knees buckled and her head snapped back and her body started having spasms uncontrollable shaking. Tania unleashed a blood boiling scream that sent shivers down every man and women that could hear her. Her voice echoed off her broken walls that were now falling down, down, down.

Beecher caught her before she hit the ground, lifted her and carried her back into the base. He walked through the steel doors and into the base, up four flights of stairs and down the long hall way, so long it seemingly never ended. Everybody came out to see Tania shake, twisted with pain, Beecher just continued down the hallway, it went on forever, lost in life, lost in time. But finally he arrived at a door at the end of the long hall way reading "room 13" embodied with red.

Beecher had never been inside Tania’s room; it was a large room. The room or more so an apartment consisted with 4 different rooms, the bedroom, the bathroom, the kitchen, and the living room. In the living room there was a long dinning table at least fifteen feet. There was a couch with decorative roses sown into it and two lounge chairs, but each room had red everywhere. Red rug, red chairs, red bed sheets, red curtains, and especially red roses. Roses decorated every corner of the room, all bright red, shinning like fire. Searing with anger. There were several vases holding 13 roses all filled nearly to the brim with water. In the middle of everything was the fire, burning with agony.

Beecher turned to leave when he heard something

“Was it an accident?” Tonia said quietly. Beecher paused for a minute and than turned.

“I really don’t know” he lied. He left the room and closed the door, leaving the un-ending sobs behind him.





The next morning Beecher came back and walked down the long hallway to find Tania’s door. But it looked different, the crimson red “13” that had been so bright the day before had now faded. He knocked loudly and waited for an answer. He heard loud footsteps and Tania opened the door with a large smile.

“And a pleasant good mourning to you” Tania said widening her smile. Beecher looked at her, confused. “Well come in! Come in!” Tania urged. Beecher walked into the room that seemed to have changed drastically since last night. It seemed duller despite Tania’s shinning mood the room seemed to have lost its color. The red had dulled and became darker and its brilliant color was no longer as shocking. The roses vases that they had been sitting in were now drained of the water and the roses had began to whither, drooping over sadly, crying for water.

Tania had walked around the table and into the kitchen.

“Tea and Scones Beecher?” Beecher turned and gave her a puzzling look.

“What for?”

“Well for celebration of course!” Tania gave a beaming smile.

“Umm…. What?” Beecher gave Tania a puzzling look

“Oh silly, we are celebrating the grand success! You have completed your mission I believe” Tania came out of the Kitchen carrying a trey with Blood red cranberry scones and black tea. “Thirsty?”

“Um no but I am Hungry” Beecher reached out and grabbed two scones and put them on a small plate. “Now um… why are you suddenly so happy about this?”

“Well I figured that we could go back after this now it’s all over and my life could continue as it had before” Tania sad down and blew on her tea. “Oh pass the sugar would you please?” Beecher looked surprised.

“But you never have sugar. Or tea for that matter…” Beecher handed her the sugar.

“Ah well different times different changes” Tania smiled and took 13 spoonfuls of sugar.

“Would you like some tea with that sugar” Beecher chuckled and Tania shot him a glare.

“Well are you going to eat?” Tania urged impatiently at Beecher. Beecher shrugged and took a bite out of one of his scones.

“Wow this is really good” Beecher said and took another bite out of the scone. Tania watched and frowned, her face sagged like the roses.

“I know, that’s what I said” She sighed loudly “Don’t eat it so quickly, before you know it, its all going to be gone” Tania got up from her chair and sat down on the couch to sulk. Beecher frowned and sad down next to her.

“Was it something I said?”

“no no no” Tania said hastily and looked away, nervously stroking her hair. Desperate to change the subject Beecher looked at the wilted roses.

“You know you should really water these” He reached forward and grabbed a rose from the vase. It turned and bit him with its prick drawing rose red blood from his finger. Beecher yelped and sucked on his thumb while Tania sat emotionless staring into nothingness.

“Love hurts doesn’t it” She stated staring at nothing but seemingly something while nervously stroking her hair. “Doesn’t it Etrius?” She let out a small sigh and smiled broadly, snapping out of her trance and saw Beechers bleeding hand. “Oh dear let me get a band-aid” She lept up and put on her happy beaming smile. Beecher let his mouth dropped, dumbfound by Tania’s sudden change. Tania returned with a band-aid and placed it over Beechers thumb who was still staring shocked at Tania.

“Oh don’t stare its impolite” Tania scolded Beecher as she walked into the bathroom. Beecher stood up and followed. He never noticed how massive the bathroom actually was, with a mirror about twenty feet high and ten feet long and an arrangement of makeup, lipstick, nail polish, masquera, and several other female products that Beecher couldn’t even name. The floor and counters were Marble and the bathtub looked more like a small swimming pool.

“Tania are ok?” Beecher asked concerned.

“I’m tip top thank you for asking” Tania held up a series of perfumes and stared at them intently.

“Are you sure because your acting very weird…”

“Hmmmm… Cranberry, raspberry, or cherry?”

“Tania!” Beecher grabbed Tania by the arms who gave him a puzzling look.

“What is with you I’m fine”

“Oh I give up!” Beecher stormed out of the apartment and went out the door. Tania just looked back and shrugged.





Hours passed and Tania sat alone on her bed, as if excepted for someone to come and burst through the door. Expect a change, expected... something. The hours slipped by like sand slipped through her fingers. And eventually it disappeared. Tania looked at her watch that read "8:00".

"Good Heavens look at the time! It's time for dinner!"

Tania lept from her bed and ran to her closet and selected a long white dress that she had never worn. She hated dresses, and white. She went to the bathroom and took a quick shower than put on some makeup even though she never does. She went over to her bedside table and dragged it out into the middle of her bedroom. She tore off the table cloth and then went to her bed sheets, tearing them from the bed she ripped the sheets into halves, then quarters, and when she deemed it small enough she placed the shredded bed sheets on the table. She went to her cabinet and took out 2 plates and glasses and a bottle of wine. She placed all on her table with bed sheets for tablecloth and poured the wine in the two glasses.

“I’ll go start the food,” she said to nobody. Tania went over to her tiny kitchen and took out a steak.
“I was saving it for when you came back” She smiled “I know its your favorite and almost impossible to get. I had to bribe the supply men for some of the Generals personal stash” She took out a raw piece of steak with blood dripping from it. She cut it in half and put an equal share on the plates. Tania pulled up two chairs and sat down at a table only half full. The empty seat moaned depressingly as if yearning for some one to sit in it.

Tania grinned and stared at the empty chair “well eat your steak honey” she said. The blood writhen steak now sat in a plate almost floating with blood. The blood seeped out of the plate and dripped on the bed sheets. Tania flashed a tooth smile and using her hands ripped a piece off of the raw steak and put it in her mouth. The blood stained her teeth red, as red as Beechers eyes.

“So how do you like the meat? Good I knew you would.” Tania stood up and started pacing around the table almost angrily. “Honey I have a question for you.” She turned to the empty chair “Why did you break your promise? You never break promises but the one that was the most important you break. Why?” she asked calmly. “Why? Why? WHY?” she started yelling at nothing and turned furiously at the empty chair. “WHY HOW COULD YOU? YOU KNOW HOW MUCH IT MEANT TO ME WHY!!!!?” Tania was furious now and bared her blood red teeth as a trickle of blood ran down her cheek and dripped on the torn bed sheets. “Etrius answer me. ANSWER ME!!” Tania than jumped forward and grabbed the plate filled with the bloody steak and hurled it at the wall. It shattered and the blood dripped down from the wall. “I HATE YOU. I HATE YOU. I HATE YOU. YOU LIED!” Still in her rage Tania grabbed the empty chair and threw it against the wall, but it didn’t break. She smashed it against the ground but it held strong. She punched it time and time again but only cut her fists and the chair remained unharmed.

Blood ran down her fists and poured onto her dress, staining it crimson. Tania sat down and sobbed and put her head in her bloody hands, smearing it all over her face. Red dripped from her face, leaving streaks of crimson, mixing with her makeup and turning everything red. Her blood drizzled from her face onto her marble floor until she was sitting in a pool of blood.

An hour passed, and then, and then another. Tania slowly got up from her sobbing and looked in the mirror. Her hair was stained scarlet and her teeth were coverd with blood and blood dripped from her face onto her once perfect white dress, she nervously started stroking her hair. Her make up mixed with the blood made her eyes look crimson. She smiled as if she was pleased with her new look, pleased. But then…

A knocking, a loud impatient knocking came at her door. Tania turned startled by the sudden knocking. Not bothering to wash off the blood on her face she opened the door to reveal one of the Generals personal guard. The best of the best, a highly trained soldier in not only shooting but hand-to-hand combat with superior weaponry such as a nearly impenetrable armor.

The soldier eyes widen when he saw Tania in her current state.

“Yes sergeant hicks?” Tania said impatiently while tapping her foot.

“Umm the uhh general requests you presents immediately.” Hicks said and quickly turned and left the room.

Tania narrowed her eyes and walked over to put on some boots and then she walked to her bed and flipped over the mattress. She than opened up the mattress and inside was an arrangement of knives; she selected a handful of throwing knives and carefully placed then in her boots and her strap around her calf.




The General sat at his table, the very same table that he had sat with to interview Etrius seven months ago. The general played with a revolver in his hand flipping the ammo in and out “click, click, click, click” the gun sounded every time he took out the ammo. Then there was a knocking on the door.

“Come in” the General said calmly. The door opened to reveal Sergeant Hicks.

“Everything is in place sir.”

“Good, show her in”. Hicks turned and shut the door to fetch Tania. The general grinned and grabbed his ammo and stuffed it into his revolver than clicked it closed, ready for firing. Tania walked in covered in blood and nearly half of her dress crimson.

“My dear what happened to you?” asked the general. Tania only scowled and turned her head. “Hmm. Well the reason I called you here is so you and I could have a little talk. Here have a seat.” He pointed to the chair across from his desk. Tania looked at the chair and then back at the general.

“I’d rather stand thank you,” She said.

“Yes, yes of course my dear. However I have a quick inquiry to make” the General looked at Tania who remained silent. “Why was it you came here again?”.

Tania snorted and looked down at the General in disgust. The General looked up at her and raised his eyebrow. "You already know why. So why ask?" she said.

"Not the whole story, pardon me for being curious" He leaned forward in his chair and leaned on his hands staring intently at Tania.

"Well fine then. I didn't really have much of a choice as you already know."

"There's always a choice"

"Not very appealing ones in my position. As you do realize of course, I committed a crime and either had the choice of being executed or joining this god forsaken piece of shit" Tania glared at the General, she knew he was hiding something but his face still was unreadable.

"And what, pray tell, was your crime?"

"Why do you insist upon this. You already know everything. The crime was slaughtering the person who murdered my family. Is that a crime General? Is killing the person who dared take away everything you hold most dear a bad thing? Is justice really a crime General?" Tania's eyes bared into the Generals, neither dared to break their gaze.

"I suppose it depends on how you slaughtered him. As in-humaly as you did. We still haven't found the rest of his face". Tania smiled and let the room be filled with silence as the General looked down as his clean desk.

“Quite a story my dear” The general said leaning back in his chair.

“Yes thank you”

“I also have one quick question”

“What?”

“No heart feelings about Etrius right?” the general said cautiously. Tania’s eyes narrowed and she turned away to avoid the General’s eyes.

“None what so ever” She lied. The General snickered seeing through her lie. He gripped his revolver ready to pull it out at any second.

“Well my dear I’m glad to hear it. Other wise I may not have told you this, but I am bound to tell the truth to you, I just can't stop myself sometimes. I killed him. It was my fault and it’s because of me that he is dead. I took the gun and shot him, through the head and I laughed as his blood stained the ground” The General grinned and looked at Tania’s face for any sort of reaction. Tania remained emotionless for a while but than started to giggle and than started laughing uncontrollably, a loud and booming laugh the bounced off the walls. She laughed madly with and edge of insanity and joy. The laugh filled the silence, none could hide from it.

The General was completely taken off guard by this and wore a look of complete shock.
“What? What’s so funny?!” The General said panicked.

“Oh yes. Oh yes, yes, YES! This is the greatest thing I have heard in my life. I had been wishing I knew who killed him so I could deliver that man the worst pain imaginable and now I can. NOW I CAN!” Tania laughed harder, so hard it hurt. The General flashed a nervous grin.

“I’m terribly sorry to inform you that you’ll never have the chance” the General pulled out his revolver and pointed it at Tania who was still laughing but than stopped and gave a massive smile.
“Good bye Tania”


If you want to know the rest be sure to read my next short story. Also if you didn't pick up on this 13 is the number of love. Please tell me if I properly captured the insanity of Tania. Thanks everyone!!


TuckEr EllsworTh :smt032
Last edited by dogs on Sat Dec 10, 2011 10:56 pm, edited 3 times in total.
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Sat Dec 10, 2011 7:45 pm
Boogie97 says...



the second paragrah "MAKE A HOLE" the doctors.... you forgot the word said.
the third paragraph.....The general was covered in blood but appeared to be unharmed, a doctor came up to him and said “Sir im going to have to ask you to sit down and see if any (another missing word) you have experienced any damage”.
Just fix the simple mistakes like that and you should be good to go:) Very creative story though. Pretty good:)
  





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Points: 8624
Reviews: 161
Wed Dec 14, 2011 6:23 am
NightWriter says...



Always Dogs. So amazing. Your writing really steals in your readers. Your words are so delicate, so strong. The whole thing flows together with an amazing smoothness. And yet, even though the context of this piece is relatively serious, it's still funny! I love the last bit - the banter between the General and Tania. Amusing to read!

Like has been said, there are one or two spelling mistakes - nothing that can't be fixed.

I enjoyed the length too! So good to have so much to read :)

Congratulations, there's really nothing more to say :)

NightWriter x
raised by wolves // brought up on words.
  








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