Her face turned red at Megara's laughter - in the back of her mind, she thought it was strange to hear Nissam laugh again after so many years of cold, empty silence.
"I wouldn't," she confirmed, stumbling a little over her words.
Megara wiped a tear from her cheek, not sure if it was from laughing or crying, and calmed down. She leaned her head back against the trunk of the tree and gazed up through the swaying branches of the willow.
"You know," she said after a moment, "I don't know what brought us here, but I'm kinda glad it did."
"Oh," Runi managed to quietly get out, voice wavering a little as she spoke. Megara liked her? As in love-like, or just like-like? She really hoped it was the first one, but she didn't want to jump the gun. "I, uh, really like you too! And I'm glad we can see each other again, even though it's like this."
Megara looked down at herself. Not herself. Nissam.
"Yeah. You wouldn't happen to know how to turn back, would you?" she asked, looking over at Runi, Rory, whatever. This was too confusing. Megara couldn't speak for Runi, but she'd really like her real body back. The lack of pain in this body was nice, but it felt wrong. This wasn't her.
She had known that Megara would say yes to the kiss, but hadn't expected the wave of emotions that followed - namely the excitement and nervousness. She had already done this once. And this was just to see if it got them home, not because Megara honestly wanted her to kiss her.
"Okay," Runi said.
She took a hesitant step forward, trying to remember how she did it the last time. She let her hand drop down to her side, walked right up to Megara, and tried to remember how she had held her the last time. It took a moment or two for Runi to remember, but soon she was holding her in her embrace.
She closed her eyes, leaned in, and kissed Megara on the lips - hoping that not seeing her would make her imagine she was kissing Megara as herself, rather than Megara as Nissam.
Megara was nervous before Runi took her into her arms. She was actually nervous. But then Runi was kissing her and it felt right. So Megara kissed her back.
The kiss lasted longer than it maybe needed to, but it wasn't long enough for Megara. Still, she pulled away. Her eyes closed, she leaned her hear into Runi's chest, regretting that she'd have to stand on the tips of her toes or pull Runi down to her if she wanted to kiss her again. "Gods, I love you." She was hardly aware that she said it as the words escaped into the open air, but once they registered she froze.
Was Megara talking about her, or was she talking about the girl that she looked like?
She gained just enough strength in her legs to go stumbling back into the willow tree. This felt wrong. She was letting herself get her hopes up when she knew that the most obvious reason for Megara saying something that was because she looked like her last love. And it wasn't fair to Megara for Runi to keep reminding her of the love she had lost, even though Runi was starting to see Megara more than Nissam when she looked at her face.
Megara's eyes widened and she stepped back. She'd overstepped her bounds. Runi didn't think of her that way.
Megara blinked, "I'm sorry...I...I'm sorry." And then, like a coward, she darted off. She wasn't sure where she was going at first, but once she spotted the shoreline she made her way there.
Sitting down on the beach, Megara buried her face in her hands. She always had been good at breaking things. She should have guessed this would happen, stayed away.
A heavy feeling had settled into her chest as she watched Megara run away. She wanted to say more - to explain why she reacted like she had - but Megara was gone before she could even get the words out. All she could do was just stare after Megara's receding figure until it was completely gone.
Runi took a deep, shaky breath.
Why did it feel like she had just made a major mistake?
She stared down at her hands that weren't hers. It had to have been the right choice. Megara was only feeling the way that she did because she looked like someone that she had loved. It wasn't actually Runi that she was in love with. And that had been the same thing back at the dance, too - she was putting on an act. They were supposed to be lovers, and...
Runi faltered.
For an act, it had felt surprisingly real.
Taking a deep breath, Runi left the tree and following the unofficial path Megara had taken through the forest. She eventually found her sitting on the beach, head in her hands. Runi wasn't sure what to say.
Megara jumped and looked up. Runi. Of course it was Runi, it couldn't be anyone else.
"I'm sorry," she said quickly, "I overstepped. I'm sorry. I..." she didn't know what else to say. She was desperate to repair this...whatever it was she'd screwed up. She needed to reset it. But, for someone meant to be good with words, Megara couldn't find the right ones to do that.
"Were you..." She faltered. She was scared of confirming what she already was certain about. But Megara seemed so sad, and she didn't want her to think that she was the one who had made the mistake. "Were you saying that to me, or to the person I look like?"
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