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Asthmatic Character?



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Tue Jan 09, 2018 10:46 pm
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mellifera says...



I'm working on a short story piece for a contest. I had no intentions of having an asthmatic character, but I was writing him and he just decided he was going to be asthmatic.

Now, my mother is asthmatic, so I can talk to her about it, and I've been doing research, so I'm less worried about writing it wrong (not to say I'm not worried about that at all, because I'm not asthmatic and the last thing I want to do is portray it wrong), and more worried that it's fallen into that sort of 'nervous boy' (or the 'nerdy inhaler' as it seems to be called) trope. I've seen it so many times, where the shy, nervous and/or nerdy kid has asthma and it's never written in well. Cody, the MC who has asthma, is somewhat nervous, but not so much shy as reserved. (and he's not really nerdy)

Should I just cut it out? I usually keep things like this in because it's something that comes naturally with the character without my interference, but I really don't like that trope and I didn't realise that it might come across that way until much later.

Thanks!

(I don't know if I worded this quite right, and I apologise if this sounded offensive in any way. It was not my intention)
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Tue Jan 09, 2018 11:13 pm
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Vervain says...



Sup. I'm asthmatic myself, severely so -- doctors going "how have you lived this long without medication" kind of asthmatic. To be clear, I manage my asthma with a combination of medication, prevention, and natural remedy.

And to this I say: lol, go ahead and write an asthmatic character. You can write him as wrong as humanly possible and trust me, at least one person (see: me) will still be happy you tried.

I'm worried about writing a lot of stuff wrong, too. But with asthma, it's one of those invisible illnesses where all you can really do is keep an eye on where it would realistically pop up.

For example, he's probably not going to need to use an emergency inhaler after a normal, typical class (assuming high school aged characters). But after gym, if he's been active? Or after a debate class where he might get worked up? Or in the halls if people are spraying perfume?

This can translate into fantasy and sci-fi, too.

Just be creative, and don't worry too much. He doesn't have to use his inhaler every 10 minutes to make sure the audience knows he's asthmatic. Honestly, you can probably have it as an aside ("His mother always kept an eye on him, worried he might have another asthma attack") or something.
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Wed Jan 10, 2018 7:25 pm
mellifera says...



Thank you for your input and your pointers! I really appreciate it :)
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Wed Jan 17, 2018 3:44 am
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Kale says...



On a side note, kinda, one scenario that could naturally highlight him having asthma is him struggling with breathing in cold weather. It depends on the climate of your setting, of course, but if you have the opportunity to set a scene in cold weather with some exertion mixed in, that's a pretty good set up for an attack, and one that isn't tied to an emotional state or lack of physical fitness.

I have very mild asthma that doesn't typically require medication to manage, but any sort of moderate to serious exertion in cold weather is enough to leave me short of breath for hours after. Getting any place faster than a regular walk in below-freezing temperatures is just not possible without a disproportionate amount of wheezing and the lingering taste of blood in the back of my throat.

It really sucks, and that's just with mild asthma.
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Mon Jan 22, 2018 5:06 pm
mellifera says...



Thank you for the suggestion! I think I'll fix up a scene for the winter, because I like that idea :)

Okay, new question: what about florist shops? Would this be a particular aggravator for asthma from the pollen?
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Thu Jan 25, 2018 1:04 am
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Vervain says...



Honestly, I've found that pollen doesn't bother me too much, depending on season. I lived in South Florida for most of my life, so I was fairly exposed to grass, flower, and tree pollen -- like, all the time, year round. And those don't really bother me, funnily enough!

Animal dandruff, on the other hand... I'm mildly allergic to cats and dogs, and even spending five minutes with a dog is enough to put me into a mild asthma attack. I have to have either my emergency inhaler, my nebulizer (aka life-saving machine), or a ton of allergy medicine and my Bronkaid to make it through a full visit at a house with dogs.

Now, everyone is different. If he's got a mild allergy or even severe allergy to pollen, then he'll probably be badly triggered by a florist -- BUT, if he knows about it, he'll probably either avoid florists altogether or come prepared with medication or other ways of managing it.

(One home remedy my mom swears by -- warm tea and honey, black tea if you have it. It relaxes the chest or something like that. I don't know the science, but it works for me. Maybe google natural asthma remedies or something? They're a dime a dozen and some of them actually work.)
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Thu Jan 25, 2018 2:04 am
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Omni says...



Same with me, I personally don't get asthma attacks by pollen. I think that, if someone's allergic to pollen and things like that they could, but you can be allergic in ways that's not necessarily getting an asthma attack. Like, for me, I am allergic to grass, so whenever I mow, I have to take a Benadryl thirty minutes before or I'll start itching all over, but it doesn't give me troubles breathing.

Things that do give me troubles breathing: Normal activities that people don't think are strenuous can send me into an asthma attack; other people wheezing; cigarette smoke; any kind of smoke honestly; mold, mildew; animals, particularly dogs and cats.

Regarding mold and mildew (and smoke to a degree) I can tell when I'm ingesting things like that. It swells my throat slightly and can make it hard to breath, and I can tell almost immediately when a room has mold in it.
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Thu Jan 25, 2018 2:38 am
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Holysocks says...



I was wondering about smoke, too, and Omnom mentioned cigarette smoke.

I just wanted to mention that even something like forest fires could potentially be an issue (if you have trouble with smoke) because of all the smoke that hangs around while there's forest fires.

Maybe that wouldn't be relevant for your story (and I'm sorta semi-asking folks here if they have a problem with smoke like that) but something to keep in mind perhaps.
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Thu Jan 25, 2018 1:14 pm
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Vervain says...



Forest fires are actually the worst. I grew up next to a state park, and whenever they did a controlled burn in the area, I could barely go outside for days.

I grew up around smokers, so cigarette smoke doesn't bother me as much, but a forest fire or bonfire will still get me. It's awful.
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Thu Jan 25, 2018 3:51 pm
mellifera says...



Thank you guys so much for all your help <3

I think I'm definitely going to try to include some of your suggestions, and I'll make sure to look up those asthma remedies!

I don't think smoke will end up being too relevant, but I'll keep that in mind. I think the biggest issue was the florist's, because that's where he works. I don't know why I hadn't considered any pollen related issues when I first started writing him.
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Sat Jan 27, 2018 12:22 am
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Kale says...



Pollen doesn't bother me, and I'm not allergic, but the things that do bother me are cigarette smoke (but not woodsmoke since I grew up around a lot of it) and some (but not all) perfumes. Cigarette smoke is more irritating to me than anything, but an encounter with certain perfumes will send me coughing so hard, I puke. It sucks, and I never know when it might strike.
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Tue Jan 30, 2018 2:28 pm
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JoeBookman says...



Just don't make him use his inhaler every time he's scared (looking at you, Goonies). That's the trope that drives me crazy. Often asthmatic children can grow up socially disadvantaged because we can't be as active on the playground or in sports. When I was a kid I had to spend half my lunch period reporting to the nurse. That's where I think the shy or nervous asthmatic stereotype stems from.
  





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Mon Feb 05, 2018 12:55 am
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Megrim says...



Since you said this is for a contest, you're probably already done and moving on by now xD But I'll chime in anyway.

What you're asking about is representation. So think about it like any other thing that deals with representation.

I really don't like that trope and I didn't realise that it might come across that way until much later.


- Woman character comes across as emotional, hysterical, and useless until much later.
- Black side character comes across as sassy and flat, just there to be a sounding board, until much later.
- Gay character comes across as superficial, bitchy, and shallow, until much later.
- Bulimic character comes across as just doing it for attention, until much later.

If you have to ask, you already know it's an issue. The issue isn't with the character, it's the "comes across until much later." Change that part.

I think everyone who's posted has given tons of great ideas. The problem with the asthmatic cliche is, as you said, them needing it when they're nervous or being overly nerdy. But change those scenes to them walking through the cold to get to school, or getting too near someone wearing purfume--those are just everyday regular things your character has to deal with. Instead of tacking the disability onto the story, it *becomes* the story. And based on your comments, that's probably already how you've edited it. I just think it's worth some extra thought as to why those feel like such good suggestions!

Avoid using a disability as a character quirk. To them, it influences every minute of every day of their life. It affects their world view, their social interactions, and their decision making. Sometimes tall people have a hard time seeing things because some horizontal beam or other is in the way, until they get much closer than someone of average height. It's the little stuff like that which makes it real.
  





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Tue Feb 06, 2018 5:39 pm
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mellifera says...



Nope! I'm rewriting it right now. Actually, the contest deadline is in May.

Yeah, the way I had it written in the original draft was clunky and didn't make sense. That's why I really wanted suggestions, because I knew that it had to be fixed and reading about it can only tell me so much. I want to try to write it as realistically as I can, without it becoming (like Megrim said) just a character quirk, or something I randomly threw in.

I'm going through it and including the suggestions now that I've finally gotten around to starting it again.

Once again, thanks to everyone who has posted here <3
I believe in a universe that doesn't care and people that do.

You and I, we are matter, and it matters.

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