Young Writers Society

Sticks and Stones [lyrical]

You come at me with words so sharp,
They slash my skin and leave a mark,
They stay for life, those scars you leave,
You though I didn’t feel a thing?

Oh, sticks and stones may crack my bones,
But words will always break me.

My mama told me I was nice,
Why do you disagree?

Two years ago I loved myself,
I knew that I was strong,

It started when you rolled your eyes,
And everybody followed you.

The looks I got, they were so mean,
You’d think I’m Hester Prynne.

You glared at me as I passed by,
And whispered,
“You’re so lame,”

Oh, sticks and stones may crack my bones,
But words will always break me,

Why did you call me all those names?
You must’ve had a reason
To laugh at me,
To poke and tease,
To say, “Man, you’re so ugly!”

Am I repulsive, am I fat?
Am I really just a face?
Am I so lowly you can’t care
To find out my real name?

[I’ll give you a hint, it’s not ‘moron’,
‘idiot’, or ‘gross’]

In fact, I’d like to think today
That it won’t have to be on a grave!
‘Cause sticks and stones may crack my bones,
But your words will break me,

I am not here for you to laugh
At so I’ll tell you one… more… time—

Sticks and stones could break my bones,
But words can break me, too.

I'm surprised no one has commented on this yet. This is great! Although I found the exclamation point after the chorus a bit cliche and corny, it has very good structure. I love how you played with the idea of sticks and stones. It is very unique in my opinion. I especially loved the bit in brackets. Great job!

This is very nice. The idea behind it is really interesting as well. You've made a slight twist of the old saying, which makes it original and at the same time derived so that it sounds unique. I don't have any suggestions for improving it. Just keep reading through it a lot and you'll automatically find places that either need correction or alteration. All-in-all a very fine piece and I'm looking forward to reading more from you. Keep the ink flowing!