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Young Writers Society


Living Life in a Lonesome Roadhouse



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766 Reviews



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Points: 650
Reviews: 766




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766 Reviews



Gender: None specified
Points: 650
Reviews: 766
Wed Apr 01, 2020 8:50 pm
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Brigadier says...



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Spoiler! :
Brie and Kaiser Rolls

Wednesday, April 1, 2020
3:33 PM

It starts with sitting all alone in a train station. Then moves to the lonely walk through whole foods as busy regulars rush around them - paying no mind. From here they walk back through packed streets

To a hotel room where they might as well be sitting alone. Not entirely surrounded with a mob of cheerful people but still not living the definition of being alone by what the dictionary might say.

For anyone else, this is probably a moment they would have forgotten. Something shuffled into the deck of cards that is life - very rarely pulling an ace from their sleeve.

The first step is a sharp knife that is sunken into a wedge of brie. No knife is used for the separation of bread - it is simply torn apart by the wild horses - no limbs in sight to split them apart on.

Such a simple meal - accompanied by a beverage - which doesn't fill up the stomach at first glance. Holding it in their hands brings on the feelings of hundreds of generations.

With the seeds falling on the table, the consumer is soon surrounded by a mess they don't have the skills to clean up. It's easy to wipe the seeds up but it's not so simple to take care of the brain.



the brigadier rides again!
LMS VI: Lunch Appointment with Death

  





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Wed Apr 01, 2020 11:32 pm
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alliyah says...



First. That opening gif is everything.

Second. I'm really excited you're tackling food poetry again, because you're good at it and food is great.

On your first poem, like I said in the pad I like this poem a lot because it does feel like reflective of something more than the reader is seeing, you're giving the reader like a tiny window into a bigger story - but then leaving a few really loaded lines that make it seem like there's something big we're missing. It definitely gives it a mysterious quality, and prompts reflection on the narrative. I like your voice and word choice quite a bit in the first poem too. Looking forward to your NaPo Jack! :)
you should know i am a time traveler &
there is no season as achingly temporary as now
but i have promised to return
  





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Fri Apr 03, 2020 3:44 pm
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Brigadier says...



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Spoiler! :
Seeing Seeds in Multi Grain Bread

Thursday, April 2, 2020
10:36 AM

The average amount of seeds in bread goes from zero to twelve.

Seeds often fall on the table of life but with this bread, there is so much effort that goes into retaining the ingredients. They are part of the overall flavor of the bread that is antagonized by the buttery spread.

Sometimes life needs a little bit of help with the taste that it's going to leave in an unfortunate soul's mouth.

Just like sometimes good memories can turn bad. The certain reflections on things thought to be happy can be turned around by the memories that accompany it.

When they first look back on the seeds in the bread, they thought that it was one of those happy memories. One of their very few happy thoughts. But the longer that they look down on themself,
sitting at a table spreading butter on bread, they realize that it wasn't a happy memory at all.

It was a reflection on the overall loneliness that they have spent their entire life suffering through.

~

The average amount of seeds in bread goes from zero to twelve.




the brigadier rides again!
LMS VI: Lunch Appointment with Death

  





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Fri Apr 03, 2020 3:46 pm
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Brigadier says...



@alliyah <3
And as I had said in the pad there's some very complex emotions wrapped up in my glorified food porn, so I hope you can still enjoy it.

the brigadier rides again!
LMS VI: Lunch Appointment with Death

  





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Sat Apr 04, 2020 5:15 pm
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Brigadier says...



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Spoiler! :
Blueberry Pancakes

Friday, April 3, 2020
12:02 PM

Another good memory turned sour like a blueberry that looks ripe on the outside and then turns bitter in be- tween their jaws. It's something that

they wanted to be looking down on. On that picnic table representing every- thing in their life and waiting for the ants to come and sample everything. Sitting among everything else are the simple blueberry pancakes. Some of the ingredients are from the local fields and others are reminders of the old mills by the Spanish springs.

Each bite of those pancakes is a reminder of the day so far and the work that they've done to dine on the flat fruit cakes that were presented before them.



the brigadier rides again!
LMS VI: Lunch Appointment with Death

  





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Mon Apr 06, 2020 4:08 pm
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Brigadier says...



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Spoiler! :
Disney Waffles

Saturday, April 4, 2020
10:59 AM

This is one of the few memories that they can look back fondly upon.

A series of fond times that haven't been taken away by growing up, and recovering the bad thoughts that had been painfully locked away.

All in attempt to protect the inside of their mind. They've slowly hurt themself to hide away in an alternate galaxy where they don't have to feel any fear while eating batter shaped into the head of a mouse. The specific one representing capitalism.

But still they try to wipe away all the bad thoughts of adulthood to focus on pouring syrup on the divots in the grid cake before them.

And then they realize these irons aren't sold anymore and they are getting old.




the brigadier rides again!
LMS VI: Lunch Appointment with Death

  





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Mon Apr 06, 2020 6:45 pm
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Brigadier says...



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Spoiler! :
Chocolate Muffins

Sunday, April 5, 2020
11:12 AM

muffins are deceiving.
that's the only truth that
they can manage to tell.

anyone who bites into a
chocolate muffins knows
that this isn't a health food.
no matter what the label
might proclaim to say.

if they're going to choose
a chocolate muffin, they
should go a step further

and choose the muffin
loaded with chocolate
chips that are absolutely
spilling over the top.




the brigadier rides again!
LMS VI: Lunch Appointment with Death

  





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Wed Apr 08, 2020 10:42 pm
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Brigadier says...



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Spoiler! :
The Evils of Banana Bread

Monday, April 6, 2020
1:46 PM

It's an unpopular opinion.
You can complain about the presence of walnuts within the larger product, but it's somehow offensive to point out that bananas don't exactly belong in bread.
And you shouldn't get hate mail for disliking having the ape's favorite food in some -thing you would have liked to eat a sandwich on.




the brigadier rides again!
LMS VI: Lunch Appointment with Death

  





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Wed Apr 08, 2020 10:49 pm
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Brigadier says...



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Spoiler! :
Apple Strudel

Tuesday, April 7, 2020
5:31 PM

It's an easy dessert to misspell with reminders of the family that they miss. They'd like to go back a step to when they were sitting on a stoop step, their grandfather smoking a cigar, and they're writing a new comedy routine. And turning to the other grandfather
That was what they were looking forward to but they never got to have such a moment. Death had taken away their hopes and dreams to be a comedy queen and a farm core dyke.
So now, like with every other dish, they sit alone on the roof of their apartment building. Eating bits of apple strudel while they act out parts of their new comedy routine and move about to tend to the community garden.




the brigadier rides again!
LMS VI: Lunch Appointment with Death

  





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Wed Apr 08, 2020 11:20 pm
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Brigadier says...



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Spoiler! :
Colonial Tea Party

Wednesday, April 8, 2020
5:31 PM

Unlike the other dishes, it's not a simple idea.

It's moving between the moods of a society
that values itself on its ability to give a per-
formance with every meal served. And this
one is one of the most theatrical on the menu.

One cube of sugar or two?
Yes or no to lemon?
Is the lavender too strong?
Or is the tangerine just right?


Part of the walk about the stage,
across the finely woven and perfectly
colored carpets, are the elegant clothes
that hang over layer of petticoats.

Where did your gown come from?
Oh - is it home made?
Or made by a maid?


Watching the guests' eyes as they
judge the birds drawn into the wall paper.
It matches perfectly to the golden cranes
supporting the granite table top.

That is such a unique table.
It seems perfectly French for
the rest of the room. Are we
eating in your Louisiana style?


And there it begins. That the guests are
different from the host. They all were born
into high society but born into different
parts of the country with opposite morals.



the brigadier rides again!
LMS VI: Lunch Appointment with Death

  





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Thu Apr 09, 2020 5:09 am
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alliyah says...



As I'm reading these, it's definitely stirring up a lot of memories I have with some of these different food-items too! It's interesting how deeply food is rooted into our memories, relationships, culture etc.

I really liked the Blueberry Pancake one - I think because it felt pretty straight-forward and emotionally very expressive. But I think my favorite so far is this last tea-party one - your imagery and little details and dialogue are just perfect, it's a fun read with a lot of depth.
you should know i am a time traveler &
there is no season as achingly temporary as now
but i have promised to return
  





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Sun Apr 12, 2020 1:24 am
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mckaylaam says...



Wow, I haven't read many poems in my life about food, so these were a real treat to be able to read! I really enjoyed your banana bread poem - I myself am not a fan of banana bread (although my entire family is) so I really liked the humor you placed into that piece. I also really liked your Colonial Tea Party poem, especially the stanza where you wrote "Oh - is it home made? Or made by a maid?"

Keep up the great work!

--
"And I love the thought of being with you,
or maybe it's the thought of not being so alone."


  





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Sun Apr 12, 2020 5:44 pm
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Brigadier says...



Thank you @mckaylaam and @alliyah for your kind words. I'm glad you're enjoying my poems this year.

the brigadier rides again!
LMS VI: Lunch Appointment with Death

  





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Sun Apr 12, 2020 5:53 pm
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Brigadier says...



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Spoiler! :
Lemon Zinger with Honey

Thursday, April 9, 2020
5:31 PM

It's a very simple concept.
Actually simple this time.

Boil the water and wait for the kettle to whistle.
Place the honey in the bottom of the cup, squeeze the lemon juice on top of the honey, and leave the citrus rind in the cup with the newly inserted tea bag.

Now comes the water, flowing out of the kettle down its graceful path to create the vibrant beverage to clear the throat of sick creator.




the brigadier rides again!
LMS VI: Lunch Appointment with Death

  








If I have any beliefs about immortality, it is that certain dogs I have known will go to heaven - and very, very few persons.
— James Thurber