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a bucolic meadow



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Mon May 01, 2017 3:01 am
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Aley says...



Nikayla wrote:Prompt: 'stone hearts, bleeding red' gifted by @ScarlettFire in a jam!

stone hearts - Number Sixty-six

stone hearts, bleeding red.
the scent of strawberries in
the amorous air.


The last line makes me think the air has armor on, but I understand you meant smelly <3 I just thought it was a cute turn of phrase.
  





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Mon May 01, 2017 3:02 am
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Aley says...



Nikayla wrote:Midnight - Number Seventy-Nine

I roam the hallways at midnight,
a phantom. Standing idle at the
refrigerator, I bring the jug to
pale lips. I leave it out for mother
to chide me for in the morning.
I learn the expense of milk.


I like that the poem is very step by step, but I feel like it could be better without punctuation at all given the sleepy nature of it. I mean, we have the same sentence structure for all of these so it's pretty obvious what is and is not a sentence. Just lowercase everything, and no commas or periods. It could be fun to play with it like that.
  








A ruler leads by example, not force.
— Sun Tzu