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Young Writers Society


Ways to Kill A Father-In-Law



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Gender: Female
Points: 890
Reviews: 1160
Thu Jan 25, 2007 3:34 pm
Elizabeth says...



1. Pose as massuse. Proceed to strangle, hit, punch, stand on, kick, burn, scratch, and maim father-in-law.

2. Block all porn sites BUT the gay and senior ones. (Shivers)

3. As Sampson, shave off beard, mustache, and hippy Galdolf hair. Baldness makes old people weak!!!

4. POISON THE COFFEE!!!

5. Walk around him continuously shouting bother and annnouncing all the sites, tv shows, and brands of shoes he has whenever somebody new enteres the room. Be sure to make up a few, just for the hilarity.

6. Stab him with his favorite wodden spatula... Like the ones that they used back in the day... ... you know... wooden spatulas!

7. Take to Museum, ask him what it was like living side by side with the Wooly Mammoth and ask him which Caveman looks mostly like his first wife, back in the day. (Because I love my mother-in-law and She's not that old)

8. Cut off legs to his favorite sitting chair and be sure to install some of those Vietmanese bamboo traps buried underneath a mound of dirt under said favorite sitting chair.

9. Tell him that Ross and Rachel never REALLY existed. That outta put him out.

10. Wear a long black cape and carry around a sythe, sneak into his bedroom at night and demand that he was the one who let the mother fucking dogs out. Then proceed to stab with sythe.

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I'm so depressed, can't you tell? *Cackles*
  





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Gender: Female
Points: 890
Reviews: 82
Thu Feb 01, 2007 5:35 am
misspriss says...



You are a VIOLENT, VIOLENT person. Why do you hate your father-in-law? You are disturbed.
  








They laugh at me because I'm different; I laugh at them because they're all the same.
— Kurt Cobain