Since everyone had such fun with my first two posts, I decided to bring this finale to you now.
Final Episode
Rating- (L3) (D4.5) (M4.5) (P5) (H-5)
This is what my posts culminate to. Well, there is one more, I am still contemplating whether it should be posted or not, it is quite disturbing.
This girl was very much into creative writing. Her profile description was very interesting and I built up some incredibly high hopes. I did post that I was trying to launch a cartoon (puppetboy) as it will consume a lot of time and attention in the future. She refers to herself simply as 'Call Me M'. Take a read, *enjoy?* and discuss.
Her Headline
"Often Traditional, Seldom Conventional"
Her Profile Description
"38-yr-old, pretty-much W, without-a-doubt female. 5'3", fit & healthy, fully immunized against rabies. Mother of two; would gladly have more but not dead-set on it. Happy on my own, even happier among family & friends. Enjoy traveling, have lived abroad.
I spend most of my free time on live music (Beethoven et al, blues, folk, roots-rock) & dancing (ballet, club, swing, and latin), films, glorious food (cooking or discovering), reading, writing, or working out--any & all with friends or kids when possible. I live outside the city but would prefer you live near Boston or Cambridge since that's where I tend to go.
My male friends describe me as "Brilliant, vivacious, dark-haired vixen, introspective, doesn't suffer fools, a marvelous poet and a terrific friend," and say you should be "a smart, no-bulls--t MAN, who's loyal, honest, energetic, handsome, and generous." (I have pretty great friends.)
You were amused by those descriptions. You are probably between 35 and 50 by the calendar, and definitely ageless in mindset. You have an intellectual/creative side, and yet you're kind of handy; your willingness to get involved and try to fix things has probably even earned you a bruise or two.
You have some traveling experience, and you love music in a way you can almost, but not quite, describe. You're fundamentally good-natured and have led an active and connected life. Though you have dreams and goals for the future, you're deeply satisfied with where you are and what you've learned.
You may or may not have been married before: either way, your heart's been broken, and you've mended it. You may or may not have children: either way, you want them to be part of your life, and would expect to negotiate that when the time came.
In short, you've used experience, both sweet and bitter, to hone your skills. Now you're up for the ultimate challenge: building a vibrant and lasting partnership, and raising a happy, healthy family.
If you'd like to hang out a while and see whether it makes sense to brave the wilds of domesticity, please be in touch."
My Email to her.
On 07/26/2006 11:46 pm EDT, you wrote:
M, I like you.
I read your profile and.... I like you.
I feel weird now. Your words, um, made me feel weird. But I think I can say that I like you.
It really was not the content, but the flow. I think. Perhaps it was some of the content, I mean, I read and I stumble across some stuff that kindaz made me say ?!?!, but by time I got to the end, um, I liked you.
I want to kiss you on your lips and I want to whisper in your ear.
I want you to read me a poem and in return, I want to massage your entire body for as long as it takes until you are at peace with the world, or probably more accurate, the world is at peace with you.
I dunno, check out my profile. and, um, see if you like me too. If you don't, I still want you to read me a poem.
Jim
Her response No reply. (I changed a few things on my profile and sent another email)
My Second E-mail to her
On 07/28/2006 01:42 pm EDT, you wrote:
Check me out!
Final updates made to my profile.
Grab me while you can!!
jim
Her Response
On 07/28/2006 06:47 pm EDT, Call me M wrote:
you crack me up...I have family in for the weekend, give me a couple days and I'll circle back. k?
best, M
My Reply
On 07/28/2006 07:01 pm EDT, you wrote:
Absolutely,
However, if your ready, and I will understand if your not, I really would not mind meeting your folks. Is it your folks that are in for the weekend? No?
Because, I enjoy grandma's too. They love me. They think I am adorable.
If it's crazy cousin Eddie though, I will pass. I get so uncomfortable when he stands so close to me. Kindaz creepy.
I will be waiting.
Jim
Her Response
On 08/04/2006 03:05 pm EDT, Call me M wrote:
yo, Jim,
what's new in your wild wild world?
best, M
My Reply (This was my third attempt at this reply, I did not proofread and made minor corrections twice)
On 08/04/2006 05:24 pm EDT, you wrote:
Hey there M, (critical error(s) made in previous email(s), read this one instead)
Oh man is my world super crazy wild right now? YES IT IS!!! You must have a bee-line to my mind. That is actually kindaz exciting, eh? Please let me tell you about it.
OK, so I put this profile up on (name of service removed) dating pages, right. And I started contacting these very interesting chicks, not alot as I ain't no whore, you know?
So, anywayz, this one girl really moved me. I mean the words she wrote were.... I dunno, just WOW, ok? So I tell her. I wasn't going to, on account of that I am a little shy, but I did it anyway. And I sit and wait....
Patiently await a response.
Well, maybe not so patient cuz' I sent another message, I dunno remember what I said, something really gay probably. Yeah, it was little gay, I aint ashamed of that. But I sent it and she replied! Oh the excitement I felt. I opened the reply immediately. I read on.....
Oh, the disappoint I faced as I finished the quick note. Unavailable.
You still with me M? Ok, so here is the exciting part. Now I am somewhat of a clever guy. Some people have said witty, or quick witted, or even funny, but I say CLEVER! And I use this cleverness to spark, and keep, a girls interest. Sounds really easy doesn't it. Well I'll tell you something, it aint no easy task. There are so many variables that come into play, self doubt, anxiety, and basic down to earth nervousness.
But there are times that I pull it off, all in the name of companionship. SO back to the story. I am sitting, waiting for a reply to my clever email. And waiting. And checking. And waiting some more. Then the thoughts start.
-Did she think I crossed the line with my clever remarks?
-Did she meet someone else, and the window of opportunity was to small for me?
-Has someone that I have previously pissed off found out that we have been in contact, and gave her false warnings about me?
You cant image the angst that began to build. Well, finally she responds.
THE TOO OFTEN CRUEL WORLD HAS BEGUN TO TURN DELIGHTFUL!!!
Was she going to ask me out? Was she going to give me a compliment?
Oh, maybe she was going to tell me, in a polite manner, that she decided we would not make a good match? Pity for her if she did. Pity for me too as it would have been the fourth I got since creating my profile.
I could not tolerate my own mind any longer. I opened the response. And I read....
Odd.
What shall I make of that? Am I to decipher interest? odd.
So anyway, I decide to save my cleverness this time, and I will simply overcome my apprehensions and SAY IT.
M...... I WANT TO MEET YOU...... I WANT TO MEET FOR COFFEE OR DINNER, OR A WALK IN THE PARK!!!
whaddayasay?
Jim
508-999-9999
Her Response
On 08/07/2006 04:27 pm EDT, Call me M wrote:
Jim,
you are one remarkable guy. A little nutty, sure, but in the absolute best way (at least as far as I can tell!)--witty, engaging, and brave too. Sparky. Definitely the kind of mind that could write comics. I can totally understand why grandmas would find you adorable. I would have enjoyed meeting you...but I'm not going to, at least not now--
over the weekend something that was not serious got serious, so it would feel wrong to see anyone else...
I hope you keep bringing your brand of zaniness to the world; it really, really needs it.
all best, M
My Reply
On 08/07/2006 04:59 pm EDT, you wrote:
DAMN!
DAMN! DAMN! DAMN!
You were only suppose to read the last e-mail I sent, not the first two.
I really do have a vast abilty to pay attention to details. I was just so very excited by the inspiration that your words instilled in me. (I should have ran better quality control on the first one BEFORE I sent, I am so stupid.)
I totally blame (name of service removed) for this. I should have the ability to delete an email I send.
That is it! I am going to write a very strongly worded letter.
Good luck to you M. I hope that guy makes you happier and more inpired than I would have been able to. (FAT CHANCE )
Jim
BTY It is a guy right? Cuz if it is another chick, yo, I am totally down wit dat!
Well that's it kind fellows at YWS, I think I may contact her soon to see if things worked out. But that you will never know .
Gender:
Points: 890
Reviews: 76