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Young Writers Society


The Vague and Trumped Up Phrases Game



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178 Reviews



Gender: Male
Points: 652
Reviews: 178
Sun Jan 13, 2013 11:21 pm
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Paracosm says...



Hey guys!

We've all used vague or cliched phrases before, so let's get into the practice of NOT using them. The way this game works is, one user posts a cliche, or vague phrase, and the next user pretties. At the bottom of their post, they include a phrase for correcting. The next user pretties it up and posts a new one and so on and so on.

I'll get us started!

Bob could hear something moving in the woods.
Review unto others as you would have others review unto you.

Don't panic!

Also, Shino!
  





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308 Reviews



Gender: Male
Points: 25520
Reviews: 308
Mon Jan 14, 2013 12:25 pm
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AlfredSymon says...



Low rustles eerily shook across the forest, whispering to Bob's ear deathly things as they billowed in the wind.

My cliche-ness: A loud rumbling thundered across the sky.
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The Tatterdemalion takes a tattle!

"Stories are like yarn; just hold on to the tip and let the ball roll away"
  





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272 Reviews



Gender: Female
Points: 10554
Reviews: 272
Mon Jan 14, 2013 4:03 pm
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beckiw says...



A guttural boom echoed through the landscape, preempting the storm clouds that swiftly took the light from the sky.

Cliche - He looked up in surprise.
'The creation of a single world comes from a huge number of fragments and chaos.' - Hayao Miyazaki
  





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178 Reviews



Gender: Male
Points: 652
Reviews: 178
Thu Jan 17, 2013 3:48 am
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Paracosm says...



Slowly, he tore his gaze from his homework and stared at the man in the room. He felt every muscle in his body tense, ready to fight, or ready to run.

Cliche- The sky was beautiful.
Review unto others as you would have others review unto you.

Don't panic!

Also, Shino!
  





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272 Reviews



Gender: Female
Points: 10554
Reviews: 272
Thu Jan 17, 2013 12:10 pm
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beckiw says...



Crimson rays rippled across the horizon, rising and undulating, mixing with warm yellows and burnt coppers. The sky was a live, illuminated, and all I could do was stare up in awe.

Cliche - He turned to her.

(Also, this is fun! Good shout, Shino :D)
'The creation of a single world comes from a huge number of fragments and chaos.' - Hayao Miyazaki
  





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1333 Reviews

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Points: 25775
Reviews: 1333
Thu Jan 24, 2013 2:55 pm
Hannah says...



It was painful for Ale to curl his fingers tight enough around the arm of the chair to turn his face in her direction. She could tell by the sweat in the creases on the sides of his nose, the small salty pools he made for her.





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