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Make Up The Worst Possible Opening Line Ever



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Sun Feb 10, 2013 10:34 pm
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Cole says...



Worst opening EVER:

"Hi my name is Ebony Dark'ness Dementia Raven Way and I have long ebony black hair (that's how I got my name) with purple streaks and red tips that reaches my mid-back and icy blue eyes like limpid tears and a lot of people tell me I look like Amy Lee (AN: if u don't know who she is get da hell out of here!)."

For those of you who are unfamiliar with this, this is the start of the horrendous Harry Potter fanfic "My Immortal."
  





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Thu May 30, 2013 12:21 pm
SkylerLestrange says...



I love that story. I always lul at it! :D :P
"It would be nice to really shed the corsets." - Helena Bonham Carter

“Don't you ever let a soul in the world tell you that you can't be exactly who you are.” - Lady Gaga
  





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Fri May 31, 2013 4:01 pm
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Holysocks says...



Lizy became a banana thief, when the sky was bright blue on Sunday.
100% autistic
  





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Fri May 31, 2013 5:48 pm
Aley says...



"It was the best of days, it was the worst of days." - quote from some old dead white guy.
  





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Fri May 31, 2013 6:23 pm
niteowl says...



Holysocks, I actually really like yours.

Now, to twist a famous (and generally well-regarded) opening line:

"As the block of ice melted in the South American sun, it neither knew nor cared that in some distant future, a colonel would remember touching it as he faced a firing squad."
"You do ill if you praise, but worse if you censure, what you do not understand." Leonardo Da Vinci

<YWS><R1>
  





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Sun Jun 02, 2013 6:15 am
Holysocks says...



Thanks!... :-D
100% autistic
  





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Sun Jun 02, 2013 6:22 am
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GlitterGabbi says...



Eef i hav dun mah homwak i em smat so congatsuashon tu mee.
[Insert Signature Here]
  





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Sun Jun 02, 2013 6:30 am
Rurouni says...



"Dirty deeds and they're done dirt cheap."
~ AC/DC Dirty Deeds.

And

"Welcome to Las Vegas! Now go home."

"I have natural talent for throwing my voice."

"MY NAME IS METALLICA NOT BOB!"

"Done Dirt Cheap!"
~Ac/DC Dirty Deeds

"I was hot, then I was not."
~Ac/DC

"And they lived happily ever after, the end."
Cookies!
  





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Sun Jun 02, 2013 12:09 pm
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AlfredSymon says...



John, after getting fired from his dream work as a technical producer at the Falsetto Rhetorical Singing Company and having lost 2000 dollars at the casino last night, watched TV.
Need some feed? Then read some! Take a look at today's Squills at In the News.

The Tatterdemalion takes a tattle!

"Stories are like yarn; just hold on to the tip and let the ball roll away"
  





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Sun Jun 02, 2013 12:47 pm
Animal says...



And they lived happily ever after...
deleted
  





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Sun Jul 07, 2013 5:40 am
octobergrace says...



I woke up in the morning to the sun shining through my window. Ugh! So annoying. I hate school. I got out of bed and picked out my outfit, which was [describes outfit in entirety], then I went to take a shower, and then I got out and got dressed and put on makeup. I used [describes makeup]. Then I went downstairs and ate breakfast.
When we remember we are all mad, the mysteries disappear and life stands explained. -Mark Twain
  





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Sun Jul 07, 2013 6:47 am
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Willard says...



I woke up with constipation, a hankering for canned tuna, and a good Rebbeca Black song in my head

"Words say little to the mind compared to space thundering with images and crammed with sounds."

stranger, strangelove, drstrangelove, strange, willard
  





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Sun Jul 07, 2013 7:24 am
Hannah says...



I woke up with constipation, a hankering for canned tuna, and a good Rebbeca Black song in my head


I want to start a short story like that.
you can message me with anything: questions, review requests, rants
are you a green room knight yet?
have you read this week's Squills?
  





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Sun Jul 07, 2013 7:38 am
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Sassafras says...



If you would have told me a month ago that today I would be getting married to Mr. Popular Skylar Rayne, I would have laughed in your face, and if you'd continued to say that he was the Prince of Demons, I would have referred you to my therapist.

(I cringed writing that.)
A pale imitator of a girl in the sky.
  








"In my contact with people I find that, as a rule, it is only the little, narrow people who live for themselves, who never read good books, who do not travel, who never open up their souls in a way to permit them to come into contact with other souls -- with the great outside world."
— Booker T. Washington, Up From Slavery