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Young Writers Society


Make Up The Worst Possible Opening Line Ever



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Sun Jan 02, 2005 11:49 am
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Incandescence says...



hm...the worst opening line:

"Want to go to the S&M Family outlet?" Sadi asked the helpless little boy.

S&M Family Outlet is a big clothing store here in Texas.
"If I have not seen as far as others, it is because giants were standing on my shoulders." -Hal Abelson
  





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Mon Jan 03, 2005 5:16 pm
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nickelpickle says...



Heres my try

"This is going to be a long tiring story of the lives of some very boring and tiring people, so you might as well stop reading it now."

LOL
  





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Wed Jan 05, 2005 3:44 am
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Bobo says...



Try making up bad intros that contradict themselves like the examples at the beginning. I.E. the one that gave a huge and accurate description of Marilee and then said that she defied description. LOL

Here's a really bad one:
Long white hair flapping loosely in the night breeze, dark face staring up at the sky, eyes blankly observing the stars, thin fingers grasping an old spellbook, tattered robes flowing slowly around him, the dead wizard felt the effects of a fireball gone awry.
  





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Wed Jan 05, 2005 9:01 am
Incandescence says...



Ahahahahahahahah :falls off chair: ahahahahahahahaha.

Ouch. I really need to stop doing that.
"If I have not seen as far as others, it is because giants were standing on my shoulders." -Hal Abelson
  





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Thu Jan 06, 2005 2:03 pm
Zion says...



She was standing on the medowy grass, her serene eyes gazing in his godly figure, she came closer to him, leaned towards him, eyes fixed upon eachother, closer and closer when she said:
-Jon you got a F- !
-But Mrs.Showmaker my mom is gonna kill me!
Without sensibility no object would be given to us, without understanding no object would be thought. Thoughts without content are empty, intuitions without concepts are blind.

Immanuel Kant
"Critique of Pure Reason"
  





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Fri Jan 07, 2005 5:31 pm
Elocina says...



Ok, 1 sentence for me:

Up the creaky, steep stairs she went, up,up,up,up,up,up,up,up,up,up,up,up,up,up,up,up, and, finally, up, into the darkness that descended upon the landing, she found a door that said, Ribbit, scmibbit, i'll do what I please, then she entered the dark, clammy, endless room where a skelton sat before the almighty glow of the eternally great and ever-powerful computer that had held her brother in its gaze until he ate no longer and rotted away in front of it, and on the screen was the last thing he had ever ordered the super-slow internet to do, the screen said, "Downloading file 'ccoooppyyymeeeeeee.wpd' 50% complete".


Like the super-run-on sentence? If you were able to follow it, I applaud you.
Feeling stupid? Follow me!
  





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Fri Jan 07, 2005 9:49 pm
Bobo says...



LOL runons are definitely the best of the worst. And I followed it pretty well, although I skipped about 5 words in the middle, which I always do for some reason in any paragraph.
  





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Wed Jan 12, 2005 2:02 am
Tara says...



"Today I will be teaching you how to eat a BB-Q'd fish."

"Hi, I'm Tara, this is the sory of my life."

"I wiggles my toes once, this is that story."

"The day that was the worst of my life was like that beacause I did something after the other time I did something else."
"You can go a long way with a smile. You can go a lot farther with a smile and a gun." -Al Capone
  





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Wed Jan 12, 2005 3:37 am
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Sam says...



*parody of Lemony Snicket*

The boy wore absolutely nothing except for a t-shirt, jeans, socks and two shoes on his feet.
Graffiti is the most passionate form of literature there is.

- Demetri Martin
  





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Sun Feb 06, 2005 2:26 pm
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Harley says...



This is a story. Stories are good. This story is good. This is a good story. This is a story of goodness. Goodness is what this story is about. Is this story good?




Not really.
  





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Tue Feb 15, 2005 4:18 pm
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Midnight says...



His dream went like this
available
  





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Fri Feb 18, 2005 4:29 am
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niteowl says...



Read this book and you will want to puke, scream, run around in circles, poke your eyes out, eat your dog, smash your computer, run around the world naked, do backflips, hang yourself, then go and take over Hades once your dead.

Or maybe you will just fall asleep.
"You do ill if you praise, but worse if you censure, what you do not understand." Leonardo Da Vinci

<YWS><R1>
  





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Sat Feb 19, 2005 2:04 pm
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Emma says...



Wood grows on banana trees and so do these weird yellow things... :P
  





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Thu Feb 24, 2005 3:41 am
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Ravenna says...



Here's mine!

'I'm a failure,' Tony thought as he picked a delightfully verdant string of snot from his gaping nostril and smeared it across the big "See Me," scrawled in red ink below the "F" on his history exam.

I started cracking up hysterically when I wrote this. I don't know why. It just hit me funny and I was rolling in laughter. LOL.
From falcon's wings thou cometh forth; to streams of fire, bringeth thee.
~Tul rhofal amruun;sarin naur siiir, tegi lyaa.
  





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Thu Mar 03, 2005 11:52 pm
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Baerodach says...



hmmm...

"I like to poop with my eyes closed."
All my life i've been searching for somethin',
something never comes never leads to nothin',
nothin satisfies but i'm gettin' close,
closer to the prize at the end of the rope.
All night long I dream of the day,
when it comes around and it's taken away,
leaves me with the feelin' that I feel the most,
feel it come to life when I see your ghost.
  








Follow your passion. Stay true to yourself. Never follow someone else's path unless you're in the woods and you're lost and you see a path. By all means, you should follow that.
— Ellen DeGeneres