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Young Writers Society


Title Feedback [2]



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Mon Oct 03, 2016 10:23 am
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Virgil says...



So, I thought the title kind of flowed more naturally and it intrigued to what the novel was about. For me, it comes off as something that would be a natural remedies book, but with it being foxglove, it has a bit of a turn around. I don't know if the whole thing about it sounding sort of like that. I also couldn't get it out of my head that it's not just a general title and it sounds like it'll relate to the book, so overall, I enjoy it.

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When the Ice Breaks

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Sun Nov 06, 2016 2:52 pm
Vervain says...



I think this reminds me largely of "when the bough breaks" from that one nursery rhyme. It's a strong visual -- I can see people standing on ice, maybe, and thin sheets breaking away beneath their feet until they fall into freezing water below -- but how it relies on the phrasing of a familiar line could help or hurt it. Personally, I think it helps it, because it gives me something to hold onto in terms of tone (dark surrealism, perhaps), but if the novel itself differed from the tone promised by the title, it could hurt.

Verdict: strong title, could probably use some examination for tone.

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Living Statues
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Sat Nov 26, 2016 11:52 pm
JadeBunny says...



It's both straightforward and kind of metaphorical at the same time. I thought of magic statues at first, but then I found out there are street performers who pose as statues. Maybe that's what your story or poem is about? Or maybe it's about both, like people living statues who turn into actual statues at night or something.
Golden Phoenix
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Mon Dec 12, 2016 3:50 pm
Vervain says...



Your title doesn't really grab me. It doesn't give me much of an idea of the world, characters, conflict, anything like that -- it's not even generically mysterious to draw the reader in. While some of that can be done by a good book cover (and cover artist), there are some things that your title needs to have. One of them is individuality. I can imagine fifty million books all titled "Golden Phoenix", so what makes yours different?

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The Mysterious Misfortune of Miss Scarlett Fawkes
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Sat Dec 17, 2016 2:06 pm
BeTheChange says...



It sounds like a whimsical mystery novel for tweens. Like The Mysterious Benedict Society, Lemony Snicket's books, stuff like that. I like it objectively and I think it'll sell well, but I'm not that into that sort of book, so I wouldn't read it myself. :)

Fallen Leaves
  





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Sat Dec 17, 2016 2:30 pm
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AceOfPayds says...



"Fallen Leaves" sounds like the entrance to an Autumn filled with sorrow and bloodshed, that leads to some kind of emotional war, waged between age old rivals. But for each leaf that peppers the ground, there is a soul crushed or a heart broken. I would love to see the way that turns out, honestly.

Curb Stomp Chronicles
  





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Sun Dec 18, 2016 6:16 am
Vervain says...



Snappy, catchy, modern. Sounds like something that would sell well with urban audiences, suburban audiences wishing they were urban audiences, and rural audiences wondering what urban audiences are reading. It would take a good cover and synopsis to sell me on this, but at first glance I'd guess edgy, gritty teen fiction set in some major city, with some gang warfare or school/clique violence going on to warrant curb stomping. It's pretty generic, but it works with the vibe the title is giving off; you could make a lot of stories work with that title.

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The Cobra's Daughter
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Sun Dec 18, 2016 6:34 am
Wolfi says...



Makes me think of Egyptian mythology and the daughter of a pharaoh. Cobras/snakes are typically archetypes for the devil, so I have a feeling that the title protagonist is cut from a darker cloth. I like it.

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Ordadus
John 14:27:
Peace I leave with you; my peace I give you.
I do not give to you as the world gives.
Do not let your hearts be troubled
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Mon Dec 19, 2016 3:06 am
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Holysocks says...



I love one-word titles; they're just so... on point! The biggest thing for me about this title though is I have no idea how to pronounce it, and when I do pronounce it it sounds kinda odd to me. But, that could just be me... for instance I didn't know about the word "divergence" before seeing/reading the book, so when I first saw it I was like "err, what?"

To me the title makes me think of spells- so I think it would be a fantasy but more traditional fantasy in the aspect that is would have spells and magic and all that good stuff with wizards etc. Like I picture a hooded guy on the cover art in grey and doing some sort of spell. I'd be interested in seeing what it WAS all about!

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Mon Jan 02, 2017 2:54 am
TheStormAroundMe says...



This title kind of makes me think of somebody having "blue balls" (sorry about this) so I'm not particularly fond of it right away. It sounds sort of cliche. Honestly, if I saw a book with this title, there's very little chance that I would pick it up. That said, it has the potential to be the best title for your story, depending on what it is about. The title strikes me as a young adult romance. I've never been one for romance.
----
The Alexithymia of the Blizzard or Infinite Potential (two titles for the same story, I couldn't decide which one I wanted to use)
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Tue Jan 24, 2017 8:22 am
Vervain says...



They both sound kind of odd. Infinite Potential sounds like it's either an inspirational tear-jerker or a science-fiction novel about the future in some way. The Alexithymia of the Blizzard sounds like it's trying too hard to be a trendy YA mental illness novel. Both have their downsides, but neither is inherently bad.

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Asphodel Tea
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Wed Feb 01, 2017 2:25 am
Holysocks says...



I like it, but I had to look up what "Asphodel" was. Not knowing what the words in a title mean often turn me off a book, because I have no idea what it's referring to! However, I've been known to not know of common words or phrases in the past, so that could just be me. Once I looked it up, it's really interesting because it gives me a really sombre and chill feel- I guess tea has that effect. But it almost sounds like a way more serious book, and I get the feeling that the main tone would be have a great deal to do with depression, or trying to get out of depression. If that makes sense. I would probably read the back and if it sounded interesting or inspiring, I'd probably give it a go!

---

Tilt
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Wed Feb 01, 2017 3:02 am
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Codayy says...



It's interesting why you chose Tilt. My first thought was the gaming slang term where you start to lose, creates frustration, and snowballs when you don't quit. However, you probably mean the common definition of where you change the slope. I think if I pick up the book, I would be rewarded with a entertaining metaphor that develops on the book. The problem is that there's no indication on what the setting is. I'm assuming it's realistic fiction or maybe set in the nineties (there's arcade in my mall called Tilt and it has that feel) where pinball machines were a thing. I think the main thing is there's no indication on why this work is different from looking at the title.
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The Camp Floods
  





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Wed Feb 01, 2017 5:51 am
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Lightsong says...



It sounds like a post-disaster novel for me, like it's a suvival story about people who encounter flood? If that is the case, I expect there are lots of insights or slices of life in it because such tragedy would require some kind of wisdom to put the survivors' spirit in high level. I'm not sure about the camp part. Floods usually are predictable since they have a pattern, so someone can tell if a place is frequented by them, which leads me to think why an organization wants to camp there. I'm also wondering the necessity of using the plural form of flood. The genre's a bit foreign to me, so a specific range of audience might be attracted with the novel.

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The subject is a catalyst, a character, but our responsibility is, has to be, to the work."

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Thu Feb 02, 2017 11:28 am
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Mea says...



@SirLight Honestly, that title says science fiction to me, since 'entity' is a pretty common word used to describe weird energy aliens in sci-fi. I feel like it would be an exploration/mystery story on a spaceship, maybe with a side of romance. It could also be predominately romance, though. Honestly, a lot would depend on the cover. Oh, and I'm guessing adult fiction, though possibly YA.

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