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The Great YWS Treasure Hunt

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Wed Jul 22, 2020 7:48 pm
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SirenCymbaline says...

Siren caught the ancient simian totem, and held it aloft.

"Kekekeke. KYAHAHA. GYAHAHAHAHAHAHAAA!" she guffawed monstrously.

Then ships began to speckle into view on the horizon. Siren squinted.

@EditorAndPerks. @HarryHardy. @Necromancer14.

"Did I send invites to those losers?" Siren muttered. "When is someone cool like @alliyah or @Bullet coming-"

Then the whole sky turned black.

"Son of a pancreas..."

And a jolt of lightning hit her squarely where she stood.

Siren jittered, went limp, and fell off the mast into the sea, leaving a charcoal blot where she splashed.

@Wolfical wasted no time. They scuttled up the mast, then shimmied up the cable.

@starlitmind, @Kazumi, @Lia5Giba and @zaminami held fast to the winch.

They heard a wolf shimmieing resolutely up the cable.

They let go.

The cable ran speedily down, plummeting the ship back into the water. It CRASHED, SPLASHED and SPLURCRASHED, directly on top of the black spot where Siren had fallen.

"Hot damn," said Starlit, peering over the edge.

"Yep." Zaminami concurred. "I can't see a thing."

"The hook's still stuck in the boat. Let's just throw the whole harpoon gun overboard, we got more." Kazumi proposed.

It fell to the deck with a thud.

The porcelain monkey bobbed onto the surface of the water.

@Wolfical and @mellifera could not see, but they threw out fishing lines to catch it.

A blue webbed hand snatched the monkey out of sight.

It was Siren! Her cheeks were gilled, and puffing with vigour.


"Now... come to me, precious monster mine! Child of the Ghoulswombe Laboratory, stitched to life by famed monstermaker @SebiGhoul, arise, and wreak havoc apon yon poor, unfortunate souls!"

Another lightning bolt cracked in the sky, hitting no-one. This time it was for effect.

Something very large and very limbed erupted from the grim beneath.

A giant, multicoloured seahorse covered in stitches, a great anglerfish's light hanging from its brow, dimly illuminating crab legs and turtlefins and all manner of slippy limbs erupting from the unholy majestic torso, leaving god knew what else below the thick, black water.

"Aye! Aye, aye!" called Siren, awed, "I'll call you Lampeyes! Crikey, what a beaut! Now let's- oh, hello."

Lampeyes' great head had lowered down to Siren, and took the monkey in its mouth.

"Aye, my son, a lovely monkey it be." Siren concurred. "Now if you'd-"

Lampeyes drew up in the air, shook Siren off of the monkey, and swam away at at least 50 kph.

"LAMPEYES! BABY! OI! YOU GET BACK HERE WITH MAMA'S MONKEY!" Siren shouted into the night.

"SEBI!" shouted Siren. "SEBI WHAT THE HECKITY!?"

Sebi ran out onto the deck.


Siren shook her head.

She scrambled back up to the deck.


And the Dread Waltz sped away.

The blackness subsided.

A new boat was revealed in the light. It was @SilverQuill, @Tawsif and @Liberty, still trying to catch up to Siren so they could join her rad crew.

"Hey, have you seen-" called Liberty.

"Yep." said @HarryHardy.


Siren soaked in rage, and a bathtub filled with Earl Grey, surrounded by candles and chocolate.

She picked up a 60's looking telephone, and dialled @Featherstone.

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Sun Jul 26, 2020 11:36 am
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HarryHardy says...

The SSS AVATS turned around and headed for the front of the convoy headed by Captain @Magebird. Behind them, slowly sinking, was the fiery inferno that was once @Necromancer14's beloved ship. There were valiant attempts being made by @Hkumar and Necro to save the ship. The crew of the SSS AVATS didn't give them a second glance. There was a treasure to be found. Casualties were inevitable.

"Do we try to go ahead, Captain?" asked @Gravitem.

"Yaa...are we going to keep pace with Captain Mage and the rest of them or not?" added @kattee.

"Uhh...depends," replied Captain @HarryHardy," they don't exactly appear to be speeding along. Look at them. @soundofmind, @AstralHunter, all just lounging around even in this storm. They're just listening to @alliyah, @whatchamacallit and @Arcticus recite poetry. Only @SirenCymbaline was actually doing anything, even if it was evil. And now she ran off in pursuit of some weird monster thing called @SebiGhoul or something because of some monkey."

"That monkey is probably important," pointed out @Shadeflame," it's @Nate's profile picture."

"Profile picture?" asked @FlamingPhoenix from the crow's nest," what on Earth is that?"

"A fourth wall break," answered Harry," oh dang. That's a fourth wall break inside a fourth wall break...that's like sixteen walls." He winked.

"I have no idea what that is," began Shade," but can we make a decision here."

"We go forward, with or without the rest. After all the treasure can only belong to one person," suggested Myth.

"Naa...I'm more of a sharing person. If I get the treasure everybody will get a bit of it," said Harry.

"That's not the way of a pirate," said Shade.

"No it isn't. That's my way of doing things in life. If it has worked the past 700..uhh..I mean 17 years then it will continue to work."

Kat and Shade both got very suspicious looks on their face.

"Anyway, let's step on the gas...uh...go full throttle...nope...wrong...uhh...blow on the sails," Harry ordered.

"Really?" asked Shade," you want us to go blow on the sails."

"It was a figure of speech."

"Don't think so," said Kat.

"Oh whatever," said Harry," let's get our hands on that damn treasure."

"Now that's what I'm talking about," said Myth.

"We might even make headlines. @EditorAndPerks, @EternalRain, @LZPianoGirl, @Liberty are all here somewhere to cover the event," said Kat, jumping up and down excitedly at the prospect.

"Indeed," replied Harry.

"Why the formal British accent all of a sudden?" asked Shade.

"Made sense for the current situation," Harry shot back.

"But was it neccesary?" asked Kat.

"Braccas mei comedent!" he shouted back.

"What?" asked Kat.

"C'est n'es pas ton problème," he replied.

"Why are you muttering gibberish?" asked Myth.

"Mata kiyanne deyak nathi hinda mama basawal walin vikara kiyanawa," he replied.

"He's gone mad," declared Flames.

"Nahin, tum log paagal ho. Main nahin," he replied.

"Mad. Definitely mad," said Kat, nodding her head," we might need a new captain."

"I was just talking in the one or two languages that I know. Jeez guys. Calm down. I am runnng out of things to write here."

"Write?" asked Shade.

"Doesn't matter, let's get our hand on that treasure now, shall we?" he asked.

"AYE CAPTAIN!!!" they all yelled.

"For Mozerella Cheese!!" he screamed. The crew exchanged looks. They decided to go along with it and joined in the battle cry.

The SSS AVATS sliced through the churning ocean its crew screaming for moldy milk fats.
Stay Safe
The Prince of Darkness

Never give up hope no matter what. A battle that you turn up to is a battle that you've already started to win.

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Mon Jul 27, 2020 7:23 pm
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Magebird says...

Mage was beginning to lose track of everything.

(That may or may not have been because she hadn’t posted since the adventure started despite being the one to make the tagbook in the first place, but now wasn’t the time for fourth wall breaks.)

She had been planning this trip for months - ever since she first heard about the treasure - and she had hoped it would be akin to the life-changing field trips the cast of Avatar: The Last Airbender got with Zuko. But Mage might have forgotten just how chaotic site-wide events tended to get. Especially the ones with ships.

In what really couldn’t have been all that much time but felt like it had happened over the span of a month, @SirenCymbaline debuted as a villain in a dashing yellow coat, @HarryHardy unleashed the forces of darkness on the sea, and @Necromancer14 appeared with an undead crew.

“I’m not really sure who’s on my side anymore,” Mage said, letting out a heavy sigh as a wave splashed up against her ship and sprayed seafoam in her face. She frantically tried to wipe it from her eyes.

“It’s whose,” @sheyren corrected from the crow’s nest. He had been too busy working on a podcast to actually contribute to this whole dilemma. Even though he was just writing the script, he was testing out the lines into a professional podcasting mic. Mage didn’t even want to know where it was hooked up to.

Mage made a mental note to steal her podcasting mic back from him before addressing the more grave of his offenses.

“It’s who’s,” she slowly said. “Like, who is?”

Shey gave a shrug. “I say it as I see it.”

“But that’s not how grammar works-”

“Captain,” @AstralHunter interjected, “I think he’s pulling your leg.”

It was too hard seeing Shey from the ship’s deck to tell for sure, but Mage was starting to suspect AstralHunter might have been onto something. She opened her mouth to give her thoughts on this theory, but was cut off by a dramatic flash of lightning and thunder (despite the beautiful blue skies now overheard) and someone clearing their throat.

“The correct use,” Dread Pirate Siren said, yellow coat flapping in the wind as she posed in her thigh-high boots, “is who’s with an apostrophe.”

Mage immediately perked up. “Siren!”

Then she faltered, sniffing the air.

“...Why do you smell like tea?”

Siren faltered, too.

“It’s been a long day,” she hurriedly said. She brandished an old, dial-up telephone in Mage’s direction - despite it not being connected to anything, Mage could see it lighting up. A few feet away, she heard a Prussian song playing from one of her crew members.

She turned to see @Featherstone giving his phone a very surprised look.

Mage turned back to Siren. This was weirdly in character for her. “Were you taking an Earl Grey bath again?”

“What?” Siren asked. “No. Definitely not.”

“Siren,” Mage pointed out, “we’re friends. We’ve known each other for years - we even completed a roleplay and had our characters get drunk together. I know what you do when you’re stressed.”

“We’re not friends!” Siren protested, taking a hesitant step forward. She pointed the phone at Mage’s chest; the Prussian ringtone kept going. “We’re enemies. I have Dread Pirate in my name.”

“I run a crew of pirates - and that sounds like a Princess Bride reference. Why wouldn’t I be okay with it?”

Behind Mage, @ScarlettFire gave a nervous look around the ship’s deck. “Shouldn’t we be concerned about how she got on here? I don’t even see her ship nearby.”

How is she calling me with the phone connected?” Feather whispered, deeply confused.

“Aliens!” Shey shouted down from the crow’s nest. Mage couldn’t tell if he was quoting the meme or testing a line out from the podcast.

Siren crossed her arms, phone cord awkwardly dangling beside her. “I’m trying to be evil here.”

Mage sighed.

“Okay, okay,” she relented. “I’ll give in and say we’re enemies - if you can tell me what your evil motive is.”

Siren gasped. “You wouldn’t dare.”

Mage grinned. “I would.”

Siren’s mouth dropped; she looked a lot like a fish that had just suddenly been stranded on land without a drop of water in sight. “I...I...I left my motive in the brig of my ship!”

“You’re going to have to do better than that,” Mage argued.

The dread pirate’s brow furrowed; Mage’s self-proclaimed enemy was deep in thought over this dilemma. The crew of her ship all patiently waited in silence for Siren to announce why she was suddenly enemies with a storybooker she had been through so much with.

“My motive is-”

“OH!” @soundofmind suddenly exclaimed, gesturing off at a spot on the distant horizon. “Santa Claus on a submarine!”

Everyone - Siren included - rushed to the very edge of the ship. Shey even peered down from the crow’s nest.

“We weren’t supposed to get that one until the Christmas tagbook,” Mage whispered.

They all watched, incredulous, as the Santa-carrying submarine once again sunk below the ocean’s surface and disappeared in the depths of the sea - not to be seen until a much later tagbook.
[ mage ]


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Mon Jul 27, 2020 8:56 pm
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alliyah says...

@alliyah's ears perked up at the mention of the words "Christmas" she was down for a holiday party at any time of the year, especially if cake was involved. She got up from her circle where she and a few poets @whatchamacallit and @Liminality had been poetry-battling to pass the time and peered over the edge of the boat where Captain @Magebird was pointing to a submarine decorated in tinsel and holiday lights.

Despite Mage's warnings of the submarine not being intended to reappear for several months.. the santa submarine surfaced and @SantaYWS's head emerged from the top window. "Ho ho ho and MERRY JULY TO ALL OF YOU & GREETINGS ON YOUR SEASONS - I have brought the real treasure of this storybook, which is no monkey or earthly treasure but truly is the joy of the holly jolly generic-december-holiday spirit. May peace and joy reign in your hearts, and may you find lots of fruit cake and poetry points in your stockings. ho ho ho ho"

The crews looked a bit... perplexed... @LZPianoGirl shouted back, "if the treasure is the holiday spirit then what does my map lead to?"

And @SirenCymbaline adjusted her evil hat and said back convincingly, "And what about that mysterious porcelain monkey?"

@HarryHardy shouted from some undisclosed location, "I don't trust this guy! I think he wants the treasure to himself!"

@SantaYWS chimed in again, unperturbed, "all I'm saying, is never underestimate the value of a good holiday carol to produce a dynamic and emotionally moving scene change." - with that, Santa Clause turned up the speakers on his submarine and blasted the holiday classic, "Rockin' around the Christmas Tree" and the submarine dipped back under the waters.

Just then as the groups tried to process what had taken place, and @SirenCymbaline and @Magebird tried to remember whose (or is it who's) turn it was to respond to the arguments, a raccoon (@ReviewBuddy) ran by chasing.... someone no one had seen before... a new guy, @LoonyMaroony who was flying in the air with a pirate hat carrying... the porcelain blue monkey!

"Get that monkey!" several people shouted and started running desperately around the boat while in the distance more holiday jams could still be heard and the smell of earl grey tea and gingerbread cookies mixed with the sea air.
maybe i make up colors for poetic cadence, but i don't think i can ever love someone who doesn't understand that teal is a different color than dark cyan

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Tue Jul 28, 2020 2:59 pm
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HarryHardy says...

"A monkey?" asked a very confused Captain @HarryHardy," how on Earth did a monkey get in here?"

"It's a porcelain monkey," pointed out @Shadeflame.

"Still doesn't make sense," said Harry.

"Doesn't have to," said @kattee," all we have to do is go with the flow."

"Wait a minute," said @FlamingPhoenix," why do we have to go with the flow?"

"Because Science!" yelled out Harry.

"You really think anyone is going to understand that reference?" asked @Gravitem," not everyone is a super nerd like you."

"I can try," Harry replied," how about this: Why sound does a subatomic duck make?"

"The what?" asked Shade, confused.

"Quark, Quark, Quark," replied kattee, flapping her arms for effect.

"Perfect," said Harry, doubling over with laughter.

"I don't get it," said Myth.

"It's like a subatomic particle.." began Harry.

"NO CHEMISTRY!" screamed Myth.

"Uhh guys we are forgetting about the monkey right now," reminded Shade.

"Oh right...there's that," remembered Kat.

"Do we join the chase?" asked Myth.

"If we are doing that we should hurry," pointed out Flames from her perch in the crow's nest," @alliyah, @Magebird, @SirenCymbaline are all chasing after the monkey in the claws of @LoonyMaroony. And wait a minute, Is that an actual raccoon?"

"Must be @ReviewBuddy," said Shade.

"So...we chasing or not?" asked Myth.

"Umm...let me see, @soundofmind, @AstralHunter, @Wolfical, all of them are going to chase the monkey, it may or may not be important," summarized Harry," so...I think we can try to get a head start, maybe ask @LZPianoGirl for her map. Maybe we can get to the treasure before they do."

"What if the monkey is important though?" asked Shade.

"Then so be it," said Hary, raising his arms for effect," we shall boldly go where no mean pirate ship has gone before. ONWARD SSS AVATS!"

"FOR MOZARELLA CHEESE!" shouted Shade, the crew taking up the battle cry.
Stay Safe
The Prince of Darkness

Never give up hope no matter what. A battle that you turn up to is a battle that you've already started to win.

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Sat Aug 01, 2020 11:00 am
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Magebird says...

As if somehow sensing that the tagbook was about to come to a close, @LoonyMaroony slowed in the air - giving everyone, Mage included, the chance to see that the porcelain blue monkey wasn’t really a monkey at all. Mage did technically need glasses to see long distances, so there was a very good chance she had just mistaken it for a monkey. But when she whipped her glasses out of her pocket and squinted at what the parrot had grasped in his claws, she realized it hadn’t been a trick of the eye.

That was magic.

Top-rate illusion magic.

The image of the monkey flickered once more before fading for good - revealing what had to be some kind of old-fashioned newsletter.

Still intrigued, everyone rushed after LoonyMaroony in their respective ships - or the ships of their enemies. @SirenCymbaline still was on Mage’s ship, but she didn’t really mind. Siren, after all, hadn’t come up with a motive. As far as Mage was concerned, they were still best buds.

Mage caught a glimpse of @HarryHardy asking @LZPianoGirl for her map out of the corner of her eye, and also caught the SSS AVATS speeding off in what was presumably the direction of the treasure. It wasn’t until she heard @AstralHunter clear his throat from behind her that something important finally registered.

“LoonyMaroony’s heading in the direction of the treasure,” he pointed out.

“Loony saw the map, too?” Mage asked. “I really should have kept a better eye on that thing-”

“I don’t think he saw it,” shey interrupted, jumping down from the crow’s nest. “I think he already knows where the treasure is - and that he’s leading us to it-”

There was a sudden jolt and a general sense of chaos as their ship abruptly crashed into land. Similar noises of collision were heard shortly after - everyone had run aground. Mage tried to peer onto the land they must have hit, but it was too hard to see with all of the mist in front of them.

“Merry Christmas!” @SantaYWS shouted from the depths of the ocean.

“It’s only July-er, August!” Mage shouted back.

Santa, in response, just laughed.

But as his merry “Ho-Ho-Ho”s died down, five of YWS’s bravest took the plunge into the mysterious mists: @mellifera, @ExOmelas, @CaptainJack, and @TheSilverFox ventured into the unknown as the four warriors of Last Man Standing; @niteowl brought poetic accompaniment as their bard.

Everyone hesitantly followed.

As the last foot finally hit the beach, the mist cleared. Mage made her way up front just as the last bits of it faded away - revealing the treasure they had been chasing after all along.

Loony landed on a chest that Mage recognized all too well. It was a relic from a time long ago, back when she was just a little pirate starting out. She was drawn to it even without the allure of the parrot atop.

She walked over to it, her fingers carefully lifting the old, rusted clasp. With a gentle creak and a thud as the lid fell back into the sand, the treasure chest revealed its contents to one of the people who had put them in there almost two years ago.

It was every Storybook Newsletter that had ever been written and posted onto YWS - long since archived.

Mage was fighting the urge to cry when she heard an excited “Look!” from @Liberty behind her. Spinning around, she saw the entirety of YWS staring in awe at the massive building just feet away from the chest. Loony, seemingly excited by the group’s collective discovery, flew over to where @KotGRCommander was resting on the building’s porch - dropping the paper off in the Commander’s trusty armored hands.

Mage looked up at the name written in a slightly familiar font above the building’s equally massive doors.

“The Starboard Seafarers,” she read - right as Loony flew over the YWSers with a basket full of newspapers. As the first edition of The Captain’s Herald fell into everyone’s hands, Mage finally gave in to the temptation she had been fighting since the very start.

@ScarlettFire, AstralHunter, sheyren, @Featherstone, and @soundofmind all took that as their cue to join Mage as she climbed up the steps to The Starboard Seafarers.

And Loony, who had also been on it since he first appeared to YWS, landed on Mage’s shoulder and gave her a high five - or whatever you call it when a bird hits its wing up against a person’s hand.

“Surprise!” the Storybook Crew shouted.

Mage cleared her throat.

“Welcome to The Starboard Seafarers,” she said - with Loony giving a caw of agreement. “We’ve put a lot of time into building this place for the storybookers of YWS, so we hope you enjoy it! We were inspired by the Knights of the Green Room - which you should totally join, by the way - and thought something like this would be the perfect way to celebrate all things storybook-related on YWS! And, to make it even better, we thought we’d surprise you with the return of the newsletter-”

“But what about our dramatic battle?” Siren asked. “Which we never had!”

“We were supposed to have a battle-”

“I feel like this goes against the narrative,” HarryHardy pointed out. “It feels like the treasure came out of nowhere, almost like you didn’t know what you were writing until Loony first posted five days ago-”

Mage gave a nervous cough and cleared her throat. “I have no idea what you’re talking about - and if you’re not careful, you’ll break the fourth-”

There was a thud as one of the walls of the building before them suddenly fell down.

(Maybe making that wall with a ridiculous amount of Legos hadn’t been a good idea, after all.)


“...We’re still good to open, right?” soundofmind stage-whispered.

Mage gave a noncommittal and stressed shrug.

“We just be needing a little extra time,” sheyren said, his voice loud enough for everyone gathered to hear. “But, in the meantime, ye scallywags can read The Captain’s Herald an' get yerself a preview of what th' Starboard Scallywags.”

“Now that is how you do a pirate-themed plug,” @alliyah said.

And, while it may sound cheesy, with that comment, one adventure came to an end - and another, much more exciting one, began.

The End
[ mage ]


All hail the mighty Glow Cloud.
— Welcome to Night Vale