z

Young Writers Society


The Gryphon's Egg



User avatar
96 Reviews



Gender: Female
Points: 1573
Reviews: 96
Thu Nov 03, 2011 8:18 pm
tinkembell says...



Oh wait, didn't read Betheny's post heh, maybe she's jealous of Amber/Amber did something that hurt her unintentionally (y'know, got in a relationship with some Katchy dude that she liked/could of *le gasp* killed someone she loved a lot/not helped her when she needed it) and the Wildercat sees that so offers her a deal where if she helps him he'll promise to get revenge on Amber. XD
"The rabbit always squeals in the jaws of the fox, but when has another rabbit ever rushed up to save it?" Damon Salvatore
;'( please, my lump, he just needs HUGS <3
Need a review? Just ask :)
Just keep writing, just keep writing, do-do-do-do-do
  





User avatar
30 Reviews



Gender: None specified
Points: 503
Reviews: 30
Thu Nov 03, 2011 8:30 pm
Justlittleoleme says...



hmmmm, perhaps the wildercat traps Iris and convinces her to work for him(in some very threatening way). Iris agrees at first, but only to save her own skin, when put to the test this bond of fear breaks and she does the right thing. The wildercat would of course had expected this but Iris will pull something he hadn't been expecting at all ;)

The reason that everyone overlooks Ariel is because she is skilled at playing the "damsel in distress" the "lovely woman trapped by an over bearing and horrible husband", she has almost a split personality, Going from undoubtedly beautiful and innocent to twisted and conniving at her own will. She easily manipulates people, everyone except Malcolm that is who easily see's through her(being insane himself). when thy run into her in the castle they end up trusting her, when in fact she has her own designs the whole time. Since she can't kill the king herself without appearing suspicious she uses our characters instead, planning to turn against and blame them for the murder so that she can seamlessly assume leadership :wink:
  





User avatar
30 Reviews



Gender: None specified
Points: 503
Reviews: 30
Thu Nov 03, 2011 8:35 pm
Justlittleoleme says...



Or perhaps Amber did do something that got under her skin. Maybe it would be a combination of this and the Wildercat's threat? and even further, the thing that pushes her to do the right thing is when she learns what the Wildercat did to the Katchy people. Living on her own she might not have realized just what had happened...
  





User avatar
96 Reviews



Gender: Female
Points: 1573
Reviews: 96
Thu Nov 03, 2011 8:45 pm
tinkembell says...



I see ^^ I still don't get it, do Amber, Gwen, Breck, and Keen murder the king? What's the purpose? Is it to stop the king in general or let Amber become Queen (as the rightful heir)?

That could work :)... Only a suggestion but as she's the 'shady' character with a dark past, the Wildercat could convince her to help him, but instead of to save her skin, she could agree easily and not be afraid, sort of look up to him even. Because they share a similar past (her father died and she was beaten by her mother. Wait, is the Wildercat's
past top secret? I'll pm you if you don't get it XD) they could gain each other's trust - a slightly vunerable move for our wildercat ;) - and then either: in a twisted moment she decides to be truly evil and help
Amber/she finally sees the good and pure light *angels appear*/the Wildercat does something horrible to her so she takes revenge by helping Amber.
"The rabbit always squeals in the jaws of the fox, but when has another rabbit ever rushed up to save it?" Damon Salvatore
;'( please, my lump, he just needs HUGS <3
Need a review? Just ask :)
Just keep writing, just keep writing, do-do-do-do-do
  





User avatar
28 Reviews



Gender: Female
Points: 1396
Reviews: 28
Fri Nov 04, 2011 5:07 pm
Betheny says...



I think maybe the Wildercat should do something to make Iris turn her back on him, I doubt that she'd 'see the light' as it were because of her personality being so twisted and 'shaddy'. I like the idea that Amber unitentionally does something to mif Iris off, she turns to the Wildercat helps him, then finds out he did something terrible to the Katchy then she turns her back him feeling rather angry and loney while feeling like she can't trust anyone at all. Aww, poor Iris.
"The world existed to be read. And I read it." - L.S Schwartz, Ruined by Reading
  





User avatar
30 Reviews



Gender: None specified
Points: 503
Reviews: 30
Fri Nov 04, 2011 5:35 pm
Justlittleoleme says...



Awwww poor Iris :smt088 ....XD considering both their pasts this could work(@Tinkbell- I did intend to keep the Wildercat's past a little on the shady mythical side, though it is not quite top secret, I just thought it would be interesting for everyone involved if they were learning certain information along side their characters, you know, to keep it interesting ;) )

And involving the break in at the Castle. like I said, there are still some foggy parts even I haven't worked out yet. For instance, I have this Keen character, he's Amber's brother, but the fact is that if Amber has an Older brother he actually holds more of a claim to the crown that she does. I'm going to have to change his title to something different. Like, simply to rebel leader or something...ahhh, I know what I could do, I could make Keen the son of one of the Soldier's that was loyal to the rightful king(that malcolm killed)...that works XD

I suppose at the break in their purpose would be to kill or at the very least gain control of the king. What happens after that is still a little undefined...don't worry though, I'm working on it :wink: Besides, this is more of a plan as we go thing anyway. We won't actually be at that point for awhile and by then the motives for the attack will be quite clear I believe :D
  





User avatar
96 Reviews



Gender: Female
Points: 1573
Reviews: 96
Fri Nov 04, 2011 6:16 pm
tinkembell says...



Okay *seals lips* ;).
"The rabbit always squeals in the jaws of the fox, but when has another rabbit ever rushed up to save it?" Damon Salvatore
;'( please, my lump, he just needs HUGS <3
Need a review? Just ask :)
Just keep writing, just keep writing, do-do-do-do-do
  





User avatar
30 Reviews



Gender: None specified
Points: 503
Reviews: 30
Sun Nov 06, 2011 5:23 am
Justlittleoleme says...



XD !

Alright guys, I'm about to undergo a bit of a project. This week I'm going to be doing rough sketches of artwork for the story. Things such as certain animal species that your character's might encounter, certain landscapes we might see, and general sketches of Katchy and Whoroo individuals. This is just something I'm doing for fun and to kinda give you guys a basic visual of the world your entering without me writing pages and pages of descriptions :thud: ...XD

In other news I might not be able to make my own deadline >.< Due to unforeseen circumstances(family outing) I'm not going to be anywhere near a computer for most, if not the entire, day this sunday. If you guys would like you may begin the story without me since the first scene doesn't even include me O.o ...XD

Oh! And I figured out something...perhaps Iris could be the Katchy spy that Malcolm hears of Amber's existence from. Iris could go to him in fury because Amber does something inexcusable...since Iris is your character and I'm assuming Amber is quite oblivious to what she has done, I leave it to you Betheny to decide just what it is Amber has done.(Anything at all that you believe would be enough to set Iris off the edge as long as it is not intentionally underhanded or dishonest on Amber's part)

The first scene can be told from either the Wildercat's perspective as Iris approaches the king(she should be very sneaky with this, appearing from the shadows) Or as Iris herself approaches, readying herself for what she is about to do. Then to the wildercat as he see's the king's reaction to what Iris is saying, and then the king's call to action. This is where we will move forward, Iris following them to the Katchy camp and watching in horror at the work of her hands as the wildercat and soldiers destroy the Katchies.(of course she should start out a little hardened but it must at some point hit her pretty hard...perhaps even later down the line)

This is where Amber will need to step in, recounting the attack from her perspective, but since I might not be there to write this you guys will have to stop here.

Its not much but it should give you a fairly decent idea of the progress of action.

Good luck Everybody! Let's make this story rock!!! :wink:

(Oh yeah, and remember guys, the Katchies aren't pushovers. They and their gryphon's are very powerful and warrior like. The attack should probably happen in the middle of a Katchy celebration of some sort, catching them off gaurd some how...plus just Wildercat in himself is pretty bad. In other words this should be a pretty epic battle :wink: )
  





User avatar
96 Reviews



Gender: Female
Points: 1573
Reviews: 96
Sun Nov 06, 2011 8:57 am
tinkembell says...



I did a *facepalm* type thing and haven't been able to log into YWS from Friday to now, and I was so depressed about the whole thing (also I saw my baby cousin for the first time<3 :excuses: ) that I didn't do the Wildercat's template/write for nano or anything so, starting the storybook might have to wait anyway - you might be thinking pshhh, carry on without it, but I really want to do it, it'll /definetly/ get done today ;) - obviously Betheny can go ahead and post Iris, but I don't think I'll be writing anything ^^.

The drawing thing sounds awesome! I can't wait to see them XD.
"The rabbit always squeals in the jaws of the fox, but when has another rabbit ever rushed up to save it?" Damon Salvatore
;'( please, my lump, he just needs HUGS <3
Need a review? Just ask :)
Just keep writing, just keep writing, do-do-do-do-do
  





User avatar
28 Reviews



Gender: Female
Points: 1396
Reviews: 28
Sun Nov 06, 2011 1:03 pm
Betheny says...



:shock: Aww, I'm gonna' start this all on my lonesome :( *Put on brave* Well, if there's something you got to do, you got to do it... I think... :?
"The world existed to be read. And I read it." - L.S Schwartz, Ruined by Reading
  





User avatar
96 Reviews



Gender: Female
Points: 1573
Reviews: 96
Sun Nov 06, 2011 4:25 pm
tinkembell says...



D'aaw betheny your post was awesome ;).

Just, maybe you should edit the storybook with the spots that are taken and 'started, spots open' XD.

Oh, I've started Morsus's character template now, hopefully it'll be done in about half an hour, and then maybe I can post. Uh, will it matter if I post the Wildercat's template in the storybook now that it's started?
"The rabbit always squeals in the jaws of the fox, but when has another rabbit ever rushed up to save it?" Damon Salvatore
;'( please, my lump, he just needs HUGS <3
Need a review? Just ask :)
Just keep writing, just keep writing, do-do-do-do-do
  





User avatar
96 Reviews



Gender: Female
Points: 1573
Reviews: 96
Sun Nov 06, 2011 6:54 pm
tinkembell says...



It's up! I put it there anyway XP. Just tell me if anything's wrong with it ;).
"The rabbit always squeals in the jaws of the fox, but when has another rabbit ever rushed up to save it?" Damon Salvatore
;'( please, my lump, he just needs HUGS <3
Need a review? Just ask :)
Just keep writing, just keep writing, do-do-do-do-do
  





User avatar
30 Reviews



Gender: None specified
Points: 503
Reviews: 30
Sun Nov 06, 2011 9:10 pm
Justlittleoleme says...



"Is back" Scrutinizes your work carefully...

XD You guys are so AWESOME! You've done everything perfectly! ...I...I "sniffle sniffle" I'm so proud of you guys! XD

In other words, Good job everybody! I would say I'm surprised you did such a good job...but then I'm not really all that surprised,( I knew you guys were awesome already XD ) just very very happy :smt041 ...I was a little worried there for a second :?

Oh and Kudos to Betheny who was so brave and wonderful! :wink:

(goes to make necessary changes to storybook title :wink: YAy! I can finally list it as started :smt003 )
  





User avatar
96 Reviews



Gender: Female
Points: 1573
Reviews: 96
Sun Nov 06, 2011 9:23 pm
tinkembell says...



Yay! But... how could you have been worried when you have us awesome people? ;)
I've just realised how long I made the Wildercat's template, even without the pictures XD I'm also feeling a little priviliged that 'anonymous' liked it ^^.

I'm scared now that I know we're being watched/stalked/scrutinized by you O.o *hides*.
"The rabbit always squeals in the jaws of the fox, but when has another rabbit ever rushed up to save it?" Damon Salvatore
;'( please, my lump, he just needs HUGS <3
Need a review? Just ask :)
Just keep writing, just keep writing, do-do-do-do-do
  





User avatar
96 Reviews



Gender: Female
Points: 1573
Reviews: 96
Sun Nov 06, 2011 9:26 pm
tinkembell says...



Waiiiit *conspiracy* I swear you just edited that post, but it doesn't say edited O_O.
"The rabbit always squeals in the jaws of the fox, but when has another rabbit ever rushed up to save it?" Damon Salvatore
;'( please, my lump, he just needs HUGS <3
Need a review? Just ask :)
Just keep writing, just keep writing, do-do-do-do-do
  








"You may deem me romantic, my dear sister, but I bitterly feel the want of a friend."
— Mary Shelley, Frankenstein