Young Writers Society

Home » Storybooks Main » Storybook Discussion » Specific Storybook Discussion

Children of The Sky [DT]



User avatar
69 Reviews



Gender: Female
Points: 5376
Reviews: 69
Fri Jul 05, 2019 9:35 pm
hiraeth says...



yeah, medieval crossbows work.
I was eleven years old
and I'd lost my mother,
and my soul.
And the crucible
gave me you.

mA
  





User avatar
40 Reviews



Gender: Male
Points: 2320
Reviews: 40
Fri Jul 05, 2019 10:16 pm
View Likes
TinkerTwaggy says...



Or semi-realistic slingshot? There's a way to customize those and the type of bullets you shoot outta them quite well! They could also be magical in nature. Just throwing suggestions at this point
"Is there a limit to how much living I can live with my life? How will I know if I've gone too far?
And why did I spend my life savings on sunglasses for a whale?
I shall find the answer... to these questions."
  





User avatar
69 Reviews



Gender: Female
Points: 5376
Reviews: 69
Fri Jul 05, 2019 10:36 pm
View Likes
hiraeth says...



yeah sure. just nodding along at this point :P
I was eleven years old
and I'd lost my mother,
and my soul.
And the crucible
gave me you.

mA
  





User avatar
69 Reviews



Gender: Female
Points: 5376
Reviews: 69
Sun Jul 07, 2019 2:58 pm
View Likes
hiraeth says...



meh who wants to go first?

I was thinking maybe we could start with the teams being called to the king; when he tells them about the competition. obviously, since the king's doing something shady, he wouldn't want every person in caelum to know what's going on; so he needs to tell them about it in private. we could also add in some team-rivalry and yapping in there- would be fun i guess. and @TinkerTwaggy do you want your character to already be in the team or join as a new recruit?

and wfp's being naughty so that'll take some time; but here's the link anyway: https://hiraeth.writerfeedpad.com/3
I was eleven years old
and I'd lost my mother,
and my soul.
And the crucible
gave me you.

mA
  





User avatar
107 Reviews



Gender: Male
Points: 487
Reviews: 107
Sun Jul 07, 2019 10:52 pm
View Likes
XxXTheSwordsmanXxX says...



I added some info about my take on the air ships. Please read the wfp. As far as wanting to go first. I can make a post that will talk about how Maolan came to joint the Sky Scrapers.
  





User avatar
107 Reviews



Gender: Male
Points: 487
Reviews: 107
Mon Jul 08, 2019 12:26 am
View Likes
XxXTheSwordsmanXxX says...



If no one has any trouble with me posting first. Then I'll get it up.
  





User avatar
236 Reviews



Gender: None specified
Points: 12025
Reviews: 236




User avatar
107 Reviews



Gender: Male
Points: 487
Reviews: 107




User avatar
59 Reviews



Gender: Female
Points: 6088
Reviews: 59
Tue Jul 09, 2019 4:06 pm
View Likes
Awru says...



So em Hi!!Since Hiraeth did not reply on her wall and am running out of time.I thought i should ask here.Are these powers acceptable if are which one is better?
1)Changing the size of everyday objects and changing the age of people(this leaves her extremely strained though) for 24 hours
2)Communicating with animals and everyday objects from spoons to ships to apples basically everything
3)Making illusions
4)Amalgamation (but for no apparent reason this one grosses me out)
5)The coolest eyes ever having different kinds of visions and powers lime heat vision,infrared vision,microscopic vision and some other stuff like that
OR
All of them suck
:wink: Live Your Story :wink:
  





User avatar
40 Reviews



Gender: Male
Points: 2320
Reviews: 40
Tue Jul 09, 2019 5:04 pm
View Likes
TinkerTwaggy says...



@hiraeth Oh no, I didn't mean to portray Rylee as not a member of the team to start with; the point of the backstory was just to show what led to him joining it, to begin with. So, yes, he's already in the team!

@Awru Hai! Hiraeth's the one who accepts Character Profiles though, so uh, I'm afraid you'll still have to wait until she comes back. Guess I can always give an opinion, in the meantime! I'm no manager here, just another member.

Spoiler! :
1) What's the limit of that? Because if you can change the age of people for 24 hours, you can change someone back to one month and then squash them. Or up to 300 years old and then they just die. Which is kind of over-powered. Same question for changing the size of everyday objects!

2) Objects are non-sentient tools, right? How d'you communicate with that?

3) To what degree/what's the limit to that?

4) That could be cool, though. I mean, Dark Claw (an amalgamation of Wolverine and Batman) is a thing. Also, Majin Buu or the fusion dance, both of which from Dragon Ball Z, can create some pretty awesome stuff.

...Okay Kevin Levin from Ben 10's got a pretty nasty result out of it, though

Would your character be able to merge with people? Wood? Steel? Clouds? Rain? Having everything would make it over-powered and also very hard to describe, so um, yeah, that would need a limit. If you can merge with an entire ship, for example, you can literally just merge with the ship of either of the teams of characters then fly somewhere inaccessible and the race is over.

5) There's a lot of eye-based powers, so, which one, and why would your character has several?
As an example, Naruto's Sharingan eyes have the basic abilities to analyze movements super easily then copy them for yourself. But then, every member of the clan of people with that ocular power can develop a customized power based on that, like a super realistic illusion ability, throwing magic flames out of your eye, summoning demons, etc.
There's a set of very specific rules and conditions for that to happen, though (such as: if you want the Mangekyou Sharingan, which gives you user-specific new powers on top of the observation-related stuff from before, you gotta suffer from the trauma of the death of someone close to you), so... what would be yours?



If you have any preference, you should start with that. Surely you've seen some power or ability in fiction that resonates with you more than the rest, right? Try to get that ready, first. For example, you said that amalgamation grosses you out, so surely it's not high on your list.
"Is there a limit to how much living I can live with my life? How will I know if I've gone too far?
And why did I spend my life savings on sunglasses for a whale?
I shall find the answer... to these questions."
  





User avatar
107 Reviews



Gender: Male
Points: 487
Reviews: 107
Tue Jul 09, 2019 11:41 pm
View Likes
XxXTheSwordsmanXxX says...



@Awru
Since abilities are described as "purely Athletic" I would say that the only viable option you have given would be the vision. It's the only one that doesn't affect others.
  





User avatar
69 Reviews



Gender: Female
Points: 5376
Reviews: 69
Wed Jul 10, 2019 1:32 am
hiraeth says...



hey guys! sorry i haven't been very active the past couple of days; my first term exams have started and i'm a wreck. great post, @XxXTheSwordsmanXxX . I'll try to post by saturday, and then after that we can have someone from Wind weavers post. sound good?

@Awru meh i'm so sorry i haven't replied i tend to forget about my wall posts but @TinkerTwaggy and @XxXTheSwordsmanXxX basically covered it :)
I was eleven years old
and I'd lost my mother,
and my soul.
And the crucible
gave me you.

mA
  





User avatar
59 Reviews



Gender: Female
Points: 6088
Reviews: 59
Wed Jul 10, 2019 6:57 am
Awru says...



@TinkerTwaggy Thanx a lot for the opinion it helped me clear my mind.Do you mind helping me again so Ok this character kinda already has a power.She can make a powerful reflecting shield(hiraeth approved) but its got to have a lot of limitations like if tbe attack is big she has to concentrate really hard focusing all her energy on holding on the shield which strains her and if she puts too much effort a total black out.But then thought it was not much of a fighting power so i wanted to add something.
Spoiler! :
1)Yes it is kinda over powered but as the age changing js very hard so she does not uses it much but then the problem comes with the object changing but then it is pretty intimidating and thats a no no
2)doesn't it depend on the creator how they want to portray objects.I know its kinda weird but Personally i think everything has a soul no need of nervous systems and stuff,A soul is enough to communicate with.She communicates with the object like she concentrates her whole energy and forms a sort of connection with them so she can hear their voices inside her head.
3)Come on the world of imagination should be limitless lol.All types of illusion is over whelming i searched
4)Ben 10 is the entire reason this grosses me out but maybe i could do it for organic stuff only like combining metals,plants etc.Oh no i do not want the character to merge itself with stuff i want it to merge other stuff together.Did that make sense??
5)Maybe she can have Microscopic vision it will only include the limit that if the object is too far away it will strain her mind
I really liked the idea of Atomic vision that would be pretty cool same limitations for it
Optic blasts you gave a pretty good limitation about it that it will remind her her lifes most horrible memories
The only power that is really calling to me these days is elemental powers mainly due to my obsession of Percy Jackson but thats not allowed cuz it really is sooo over powering.Sooo tell me what should i take i am thinking vision is my best bet like The Swordsman said.

@XxXTheSwordsmanXxX Yes you are right i think now i will focus just on vision screw the rest of them
Also if i do the vision thing should i leave the shield or not??
@hiraeth They sure did it was a huge help thanx once again
:wink: Live Your Story :wink:
  





User avatar
69 Reviews



Gender: Female
Points: 5376
Reviews: 69
Wed Jul 10, 2019 9:01 am
hiraeth says...



@Awru the only thing important here is to have a power that helps u during the hunt. Shields, aging, etc won't come into use unless we're in battle, and fighting the rival team would be a strict no no 🚫 (as far as the King's rules are concerned). It could be of some use if we're in danger, but only some. Take Edema. She can walk through walls, which would be really useful if she wants to go into a locked room inside the castle that may happen to contain what they need. Speed is good for reaching treasure first if a rival team happens to be on the same castle and happens to spot it at the same time as you. Strength is good for breaking down walls. And etc. Talking to stuff? Aging people? I don't know, can't see the use.
I was eleven years old
and I'd lost my mother,
and my soul.
And the crucible
gave me you.

mA
  





User avatar
40 Reviews



Gender: Male
Points: 2320
Reviews: 40
Wed Jul 10, 2019 9:26 am
TinkerTwaggy says...



A shield could actually be useful outside of battle depending on its magic abilities/on how it was made. A shield, for instance, can serve as a platform for others to jump on if the holder has strong enough arms to hold themselves in place while others jump on it.

With sharp enough edges, you can also use it as a boomerang to cut things other than people.

With a big enough shape, you can also hide short swords inside, like ancient Greek warriors used to. So, that much depends on your creativity, to be fair.

Agreed about aging people, though!
"Is there a limit to how much living I can live with my life? How will I know if I've gone too far?
And why did I spend my life savings on sunglasses for a whale?
I shall find the answer... to these questions."
  








Man is by nature a political animal.
— Aristotle