hi ches! I really liked the simplicity of the above text poem. it really forces the tragedy of losing a friend to the front of the reader's mind. the lines flowed together really well, too, in regard to both syllables and rhymes.
i've really enjoyed reading your poems thus far, and i can't wait to see what else you have for us!
You left Promised to be back soon It's been week I'm still missing you It's been 10 days When will you return? It's been 15 days Are you back yet? Staring out the window Sunset after sunset Sunrise after sunrise Day after day Night after night It's been a month I think of when you First put on your uniform Daily It's been a year When will you be back? 5 years have passed The doctor says I must move on But how can I forget you? My brother Come back It's been 10 years All the other soldiers have come back And yet I'm still waiting For you to march through the door 15 years have passed What's another 5? I've aged so much Why won't you come back? I'm growing old I see the looks of pity From passerbys in the street I'm growing weak Knees are buckling It's been 30 years My head feels dizzy My vision's fading I hear a siren Everything's dark Where am I? I'm in a white bed Is that a doorbell? Are you back Finally! I've been waiting! No...it's just that machine Lines are on Zigzagging lines They're growing flat There's a white light What's happening? Is that you? At the end of the hall I'm coming brother
I helped you When you needed me And now, this is how you treat me? Telling me I'm worthless A loser And what for? I saved you From the tornado The tornado you created That was wrecking you Inside And now When I need you You turn your back to me Telling me that I'm Too problematic Fine If that's the case Leave And Don't you dare come back
The sand covers my feet The water washes over The scream of seagulls Distant A crab crosses Some small fishes Swim through my toes Basking in the warmth I wish to stay here Forever
I like all of these concepts you've got -- and your style (short/quick lines) add a sense of urgency or hurt, in "Don't You Dare Come Back" but "The Beach" is short and sweet!
name: key/string/perks pronouns: she/her/hers and they/them/theirs
novel: the clocktower (camp nano apr 24) poetry: the beauty of the untold (napo 2024)
The gentle drum of rain On the hull of the ship Would be the last rain The men would hear As the beach grew closer Their fear grew louder The clang of metal Of bullets The screams of the fallen The boom of explosions As hell descended On the survivors Only the unlucky Would survive Operation Overlord For those who die Can move on But those who live Can never leave that beach
A single flickering light In Death's room of candles We're all just candles to Death To Death this is all just some Sick game Death can control our lives Kill us by simply Blowing out a candle And we can not escape We just have to hope Day after day That our candle Does not burn out For if it does We'll be gone Forever
Pitter patter, pitter patter Rain on the curb Walking Hood up Head down Shoulder bump Shoved to the ground Looking up Man glaring down "Damn virus" Single tear sliding down cheek Pretending I'm fine Biking to school Humming to myself Minding my own business Drunk man in front of me Telling me get off the street Go back to your own fucking Country Telling me I don't belong Words hurt But they don't know Cause to them I'm a faceless chink I'm nothing but a bat eater A squinty eyed asshole I'm just a damn virus
The state of being equal, especially in status, rights, and opportunities. That is equality It applies to everyone So why are there women Who ask for equality Yet mistreat Abuse Hurt Disrespect Men Why are there people Who say stop racism And yet beat up Asians Because of coronavirus So really What is equality?
Sitting at the dusty table Looking around There she is Long brown hair Glistening in the sunlight Almost angelic So beautiful So close yet so far If I just talk to her She might talk back But... I can't And I know I will regret this But I leave Heartbroken
Mr. Scorpio says productivity is up 2%, and it's all because of my motivational techniques -- like donuts and the possibility of more donuts to come. — Homer Simpson
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