Young Writers Society

I wonder
If it will be easier
When I wake up tomorrow
I don't think
I have the strength
To carry on
If I carry on alone

When does it get easier?
When does it get easier?
When does it get easier?
When does it get easier?
Does it?

I'm hoping desperately
Fore something
If I wake up tomorrow
I can't pretend
I have the strength
To go alone
I'm not running home today

It's never getting easier
It's never getting easier
It's never getting easier
It's never getting easier
Is it?

I'm giving
This one last chance
Maybe I'll find hope for tomorrow
I don't know why part of me
Won't give in
I can't let it win over me

So what if it's not easier
It's never getting easier
So what if it's not easier
It's not about what's easier
So what if it's not easier
Sometimes the good things have to hurt

It's over

hollowed out like pumpkin heads
or at the base of trees
where little critters burrow, rest
crawl in homes on their knees

not empty like a wine glass
or a snail's abandoned shell
here at my base i've made a home
for all my hopes to dwell

but on some days (on some occasions)
they fly off for the day
and emptiness leave me alone
with hollowed hearts to stay

but such feelings aren't forever
and i know when seasons pass
the critters will come scurrying back
curled up safely in my grass

do you often think
abou the end of the world?

how could a world be made
just to end forever
like a crumpled piece of art
tossed away and forgotten

would a god or gods
scrap this art and this life
for another?

do you, a creator
an artist
so quickly give up on your own creations?
is our maker like this?

does it...
really end like this?

with a fire and a kiss
and thank yous for what we were
but our artist
needs to move on?

how could it really end like this?
do you often think
about the end of the world?

will it really come to an end
with all life ceasing - to exist or to be?
will earth remain a cesspool of
forgotten memories?

does it really end...
like this?

fire
and a
slowing wind
catching a thought
ablaze

it's no one else's fault
that i've filled up my mind to the brim

throughs spilling out before i can catch them
water slipping through my hands

good and bad forgotten
when my foot catches rocks on the path

apologies can't fill the empty space left behind
but i'm sorry, i'm sorry, i'm sorry

i told you you were unforgettable
but i forgot you anyway

did you forget
the promise we made

years ago
before we drifted apart

i'll never let you go
as long as waters rage
i am yours alone
in these darkened days
and even when the waves
come to their frightful ends
even if we're apart
forever you're my friend

i did not forget you
i couldn't forget you

but sometimes
i wonder if you still dream

of me? when you
close your eyes

and the boat sways
with each coming memory

just like i dream of you

would you tell me that it's okay
if you really meant it

you can't tell the future
nor can you tell the time
that it will happen

would you tell me the delay
is just another day to push through
if you really thought that

and even all your empty words
are just echoes bouncing off
concrete walls

if you've no conviction
i'd rather you be silent

if you can speak truth
then speak it

because it's better than saying words
because you heard it in a movie

because it's better than saying words
that just feel right coming out of your mouth

would you tell me the truth
if it really mattered
or would you stick to sweet melodies
that only medicate as long as you speak them
and fade when reality hits

did you see my sails catch wind and flight

as two dark ships passed in the night

a wave drew up against the hull and flew past my defenses
i almost lost my grip and started counting all of my expenses
how could i repay the damage to which waves are due
if i am irreparable and broken through and through

did you see my sails lose air and height

as two lost ships passed in the night

a lover of the ocean told me to get rid of my offenses
nothing will last for eternity so why hold on to pretenses
we all know life is precious and it is a fragile thing
so let us stop pretending as i sink i will not sing

did you see a sinking ship ignite

as one ship drowned in the night

smoke filled eyes
and grease stained dresses
wrapped around the firelight

weary knees
and great successes
spoke of into starry nights

tiki torches ward off insects,
darkened dreams, and ill-kept secrets

breathing softly in the wind
(closed mouths so we can keep it)

food filled guts
and drink stained dresses
circled round until midnight

budding friends
and old ones too
hold hands again
and hold them tight

back when my shame used to grip me
'round my neck like a serpent
i thought fighting was pointless

but somewhere within my transition from youth
i missed the milestones i wasn't supposed to

my childhood was stolen and my teen years were taken
bound tight by storming dark thoughts of depression

but as i've fought back from my losses
and shame's fallen off and i'm ready to do
what i was supposed to do
back then

i don't want to i don't want to i don't want to i don't want to i don't want to i don't want to i don't want to i don't want to i don't want to i don't want toi don't want to i don't want to i don't want to i don't want to i don't want toi don't want to i don't want to i don't want to i don't want to i don't want toi don't want to i don't want to i don't want to i don't want to i don't want toi don't want to i don't want to i don't want to i don't want to i don't want toi don't want to i don't want to i don't want to i don't want to i don't want toi don't want to i don't want to i don't want to i don't want to i don't want toi don't want to i don't want to i don't want to i don't want to i don't want toi don't want to i don't want to i don't want to i don't want to i don't want toi don't want to i don't want to i don't want to i don't want to i don't want toi don't want to i don't want to i don't want to i don't want to i don't want toi don't want to i don't want to i don't want to i don't want to i don't want to

i thought this little girl had grown up
but i'm afraid that i'm wrong
and i can feel the chill of time breathing down my neck

it's not a hard thing to do
you just have to do it
there's no reason for your fear
to be this crippling

i thought the shame was the only hurdle
i would have to overcome
but I'm afraid that the shame was only the blanket
draped over the terror
that change would hurt too much
and responsibility is too heavy

maybe it would be different
if the stakes weren't as high as they are
driving is a necessity
but I'm so afraid of disappointing those
who've tried to help me
and I'm so afraid of hurting those around me

if i fail i can't come back from this. if i fail i can't come back from this

i can feel how my fear constricts me
'round my neck like a serpent
i fear fighting won't work for me

but somewhere withing my transition from youth
i missed the milestones i wasn't supposed to

and i can feel the chill of time breathing down my neck

you have to move
no one else will do it for you
and yet...

i don't want to i don't want to i don't want to i don't want to i don't want to i don't want to i don't want to i don't want to i don't want to i don't want toi don't want to i don't want to i don't want to i don't want to i don't want toi don't want to i don't want to i don't want to i don't want to i don't want toi don't want to i don't want to i don't want to i don't want to i don't want toi don't want to i don't want to i don't want to i don't want to i don't want toi don't want to i don't want to i don't want to i don't want to i don't want toi don't want to i don't want to i don't want to i don't want to i don't want toi don't want to i don't want to i don't want to i don't want to i don't want toi don't want to i don't want to i don't want to i don't want to i don't want toi don't want to i don't want to i don't want to i don't want to i don't want toi don't want to i don't want to i don't want to i don't want to i don't want toi don't want to i don't want to i don't want to i don't want to i don't want to

right now
it would be nice to dissapear
swimming in a large pool at the edge of the mountain alone

water falling off the edge into a gutter
giving the illusion that where the water ends
so does the land

a night sky spread out above me
like a dark blanket spotted with white specks

and i can actually see the stars
out here

i dip my ears beneath the water as i look up at the sky
floating on my back, drifting with the cool ripples
in the middle of it all

all i head is the faint sloshing of water
swallowing me in this special form of silence

right now
i feel like the only one in the world
swimming in a large pool at the edge of the mountain alone

nothing happens here
behind this door

not in this room
not on this floor
no one enters here
behind this door

i live alone
with nothing more

i didn't mean for it
to be this way
locked up and boarded
yelling "get away"

but nothing happens here
behind this door
i live alone
and I'm at war

a pebble
and a grain of sand
would not make much of a difference
if they were to disappear
they wouldn't have an audience

would they be missed
by little crabs
and fish that lay their eggs
or would they be forgotten
just as quickly as they strayed

picked up by the passing tides
or thrown into the water

a pebble
and a grain of sand
are both led to the slaughter