z

Young Writers Society


Untitled (Grif & Lumi)



User avatar
863 Reviews

Supporter


Gender: Male
Points: 2090
Reviews: 863
Wed Dec 29, 2010 8:58 am
View Likes
Griffinkeeper says...



I've no idea what to write about. But this is the place to do it.
Moderator Emeritus (frozen in carbonite.)





User avatar
863 Reviews

Supporter


Gender: Male
Points: 2090
Reviews: 863
Thu Dec 30, 2010 7:29 am
Griffinkeeper says...



I guess the first thing to do is write some character profiles.

Name: Dr. Thomas "Tom' Templar
Age: Mid to upper twenties.
Occupation: Professor of Creative Writing/Protagonist

Description: Normally a doctorate in creative writing is indicative of some serious lapse of judgment. In the case of Dr. Templar, his "creative" writing isn't actually fiction, but real experiences he has previously had in a fantasy world. The result of his experiences have been a wildly successful series of novels. We join our hero at a book launching party, celebrating the last book in his series.

Name: Adelaide "Addie" Hart
Age: Mid to upper twenties.
Occupation: Computer Scientist/ Love interest.

Description: A long time acquaitence of Tom, various things have prevented these two from getting together. Different colleges, different job opportunities, different families. Addies Mom in particular didn't like him, because "he is a loser." Well, things have finally aligned to make it happy ever after.

Unbeknownst to Tom, they have one more thing in common: both have been to the fantasy land. But where Tom spent most of his time with the humans and knights, Addie spent her time among the gryphon rangers to the north.

Name: Marlon Grey
Age: Thirties.
Occupation: Mercenary

Description: Who's the one mercenary that can travel to other worlds in order to capture a notorious person for an even more notorious villian? That would be Marlon Grey. Daring and intelligent; he prefers cunning plans instead of brute force. Marlon has met Thomas before and plays a heroic role in his books. As far as everyone else is concerned, Marlon is a guy dressed as Marlon Grey, not THE Marlon Grey.

I do like this character, so let's see if we can make it through the book without slaying him.
Moderator Emeritus (frozen in carbonite.)





User avatar
745 Reviews

Supporter


Gender: Male
Points: 1626
Reviews: 745
Thu Dec 30, 2010 8:34 am
View Likes
Lumi says...



Name: Lord Caltras
Age: Major 40's - Minor 50's
Occupation: Ruler of the Kingdom of Bastion, once corrupted by a nefarious horde of villains.

Description: To any nefarious villain, who is the icon that can take the blame for a kidnapped hero? As the ruler of the land saved from utter destruction in Templar's novels, surely a snatching in the name of this Lord would be no good ordeal. But Thomas, didn't Lord Caltras change his ways at the end of the first journey? Perhaps not. But if a man saved your Kingdom once, he can do it again. That's why this fall-man has been convinced that Thomas is just the man for a quest of epic proportions. But is the quest merely a facade?

Name: Talon Dahlia
Age: Thirties
Occupation: Master hunter / Contact for information and aid in unfamiliar territory

Description: Coming soon.

Name:
Age:
Occupation:

Description:
I am a forest fire and an ocean, and I will burn you just as much
as I will drown everything you have inside.
-Shinji Moon


I am the property of Rydia, please return me to her ship.





User avatar
863 Reviews

Supporter


Gender: Male
Points: 2090
Reviews: 863
Sun Jan 02, 2011 9:16 am
Griffinkeeper says...



Feel free to double post if you find need.

Here is the best idea I've got so far:

Our hero is kidnapped from our world to complete a quest in the fantasy world. Whatever the quest is, Tom isn't happy about completing it. Something compels him to complete it, either a spell or some hidden motive. It gives Adelaide a mission (rescue Tom) while allowing us to keep up on what the bad guys are doing. Marlon is driving the quest on behalf of Lord Caltras, while Talon is recruited by Adelaide to find Marlon.

Missing Pieces:

- What is the object of the quest (searching for people, places, treasures, answers?)
- What compels Tom to help them?
- A snappy title that can be a abbreviated with an easily remembered acronym.
- A way to get Tom and Adelaide into the fantasy world (together?)
Moderator Emeritus (frozen in carbonite.)





User avatar
745 Reviews

Supporter


Gender: Male
Points: 1626
Reviews: 745
Sun Jan 02, 2011 9:42 am
Lumi says...



Good premise. Having Adelaide and Thomas enter at separate times, though, may make it easier to devy up the story into two major, interwoven streams.

Now, for motivations.

Consider there to be some sort of miracle water, some sort of "fountain of youth" (only health instead of youth) that compels the drinker to be rid of any disease (perhaps permanently). An ill-and-soon-fading Lord Caltras would see it fit to send a hero on his selfish quest if his knights have failed. This could be instigated in two ways, though.

One, the Lord could have kidnapped Adelaide as negative incentive for the completion of his quest, giving Thomas no choice but to comply. However, as Adelaide catches wind of a plot to remove Thomas from the equation (of life, of course), she barters her own escape from the prison and sets out to rescue her rescuer.

Or.

Two, Thomas could accept this quest (or a variation of the quest, of course) on behalf of new material to write about. Say that he fears the end of his phenomenal series, and decides that another novel could be just the ticket to securing both his fame and the affection of Adelaide. However, when she enters the land in search of Thomas, she finds herself ignorantly caught up in the plot to remove a 'menace', though she does not know who this 'menace' is (Thomas, duh).

There are countless other possibilities, though, and I'll add them in if we choose not to abide by either of these two roads.

Alternatively, as far as the truly malicious villain goes, I'm imagining the return of a previous character (I can't get the image of a badass Female general out of my head) from Templar's novels. She'd have her own motives for destroying Thomas (probably revenge), and would see through to those plans, no matter the consequence. (Read: "You killed my father, now I have his men and will certainly kill you [or at least make him suffer].)

Consider naming her after a Flower or some sort of unusual noun.

Edit: I'm stuck on names. May edit one in if one comes to mind.
I am a forest fire and an ocean, and I will burn you just as much
as I will drown everything you have inside.
-Shinji Moon


I am the property of Rydia, please return me to her ship.





User avatar
863 Reviews

Supporter


Gender: Male
Points: 2090
Reviews: 863
Mon Jan 03, 2011 12:57 am
View Likes
Griffinkeeper says...



Spices are another good place to look for names.

I was also thinking of making the villain female; the treachery of men couldn't approach that of a woman. I don't know if she should be a general though. I was thinking along the lines of Dido from the Aeneid. Dido was this Queen who fell for the hero in that story, but he had to leave her. When she found out, she kind of became insanely jealous and greedy, eventually committing suicide when the hero did leave.

Perhaps a noble female would make a proper villain. What if Lord Caltras had a lady. She became enamored with Thomas in his previous visit and now she has ambitions of replacing her husband with Thomas. She is poisoning him, slowly, while at the same time convincing him that only Thomas can find the antidote. Thomas is reluctant to go back, because he knows that Lady Caltras is trouble, but Marlon doesn't really give him another option.

Her plan is simple. Once Thomas is retrieved, he goes on the quest. Before he can return with the antidote, the Lord dies from his illness. She rewards the successful hero by taking his hand in marriage. She still has her youth and many charms to recommend her; it would be easy.

Suppose that Adelaide arrives with Thomas though. That complicates the Lady's plan, she now has to find a convenient death for Adelaide. It's not that easy though. She is only able to poison her husband because she shares his bed chamber. Everywhere else, the food and drink is checked for poisons.

Adelaide is being held ransom, which means she is well guarded. But what if the Lady decides to help her escape, but only so she can have her killed by her agents in the woods. That way, she can blame it on wild men, allowing her to assert her control over that region.

Adelaide however, isn't exactly the damsel in distress. She has also been to this land before and spent her time training with the gryphon rangers. The gryphon rangers are an elite group that patrol the frontier. Trusted individuals ride with their gryphon partners to deal with threats; usually while severely outnumbered. She doesn't let on to any of this though, otherwise they would attempt to kill her outright, instead of trusting her to a prison.

Thanks to her training and the timely arrival of a gryphon, she is able to escape and avoid assassination.

Maybe we can change her from a lady to a countess.
Moderator Emeritus (frozen in carbonite.)





User avatar
863 Reviews

Supporter


Gender: Male
Points: 2090
Reviews: 863
Tue Feb 01, 2011 6:13 am
Griffinkeeper says...



I've thought about it and I think that Thomas has to be a nerd. It fits: socially awkward, intelligent, and an unlikely hero.

If we make him a Doctor of Mathematics, we can explain it even better. Since math people deal a lot with multi-dimensional spaces, we can twist the terminology to explain how he made it into the other world in the first place. He was working with the government to study an anomaly, when he fell into the anomaly. When he came through the other side, he was in the fantasy world. While there, he was able to learn enough about the nature of the anomaly (they called it a gate) to return home. Using the mathematics (mathemagic?) he was able to seal the gate.

Mathematician characters are relatively easy to write for. Since they speak in mathematics, which no one likes to study, we can get away with using complicated sounding terms without explanation; or otherwise cannibalize math vocabulary.
Moderator Emeritus (frozen in carbonite.)








Don't cry because it's over, smile because it happened.
— Dr. Seuss