16th of Sil
Although Elias had been making a conscious effort to reconnect with Eve, he had been trying to get to know everyone. He noticed that everyone else from Earth tended to stick to little friend groups, but he wasn't really confined to any person or group. He didn't think that was a bad thing, though. Honestly, Elias didn't mind getting to know everyone better.
The exception was with Deidra, of course. For the past two days, Elias noticed that she had been zipping around busy with random tasks that he had no clue were so urgent, because she was always fetching water, gathering firewood, repairing things as needed, and tending to the horses.
Deidra had this weird expression where it was like she was at a life-or-death situation. She had to fetch the water, or else. It was kind of weird, but Elias decided to not bother her during the day since she was so preoccupied.
During breaks and nights, Elias noticed that Deidra mostly socialized with Robin and Raj. Or maybe it was the other way around. He figured that Bo told them to keep an eye on her since everyone was still wary of her, but they also seemed interested in talking to her.
Although Mel, Alistair, and Hendrik hesitantly agreed to give her a second chance, there was still some hesitation. Elias could tell from the way they looked at her and talked about her. They probably felt like it was an obligation to take her in.
Elise was more welcoming, although she hadn't tried to speak with Deidra yet - maybe because she didn't want to stir anything up with the others and would prefer that they make contact first. Still, Elias knew that Elise actually spent time with Deidra and Tula. He wondered why she was so fast to come around, but he had a feeling she had a soft spot for people of her background since Elias wasn't much different.
Eve and Makiel seemed more neutral about Deidra, but maybe that was putting it lightly. If they had it their way, Elias knew that Deidra wouldn't even be here. But he was glad that they didn't try to fight this one, because - like Elise - Elias genuinely believed that Deidra deserved a second chance.
Besides, if anyone here were to understand how she grew up, it was Elias. He didn't even know her, but he felt a sort of pride when she admitted that she began to think for herself.
It was night again, and everyone got their food and went off into their little groups again. Elias noticed that Eve slipped out by herself to be away from the others again, and a part of him wanted to accompany her once more, but a last second moment of clarity washed over him when he realized that maybe she just needed some space alone since she was probably overwhelmed by the whole week.
Elias glanced over at Deidra again. Robin and Raj were accompanying both of her sides, making light conversation.
Elias had been meaning to talk to Deidra... and well, he could talk to Robin and Raj as well. He hadn't heard from them for a while.
Without giving it another thought, Elias walked over with a smile and a weak wave.
"Hey," he said as he nudged his head over to the open seat next to Raj. "Mind if I join you guys?"
Raj waved for him to come sit. Elias happily obliged.
"Hey, Elias," Robin started. "If I started calling Hendrik baby man, how long do you think it'd take for him to escalate to a murder attempt?"
"Robin has a very strong desire to test the limits of people's patience," Raj added with a small sigh.
Elias snickered. "I think that'd be a great way to get him to snap in two seconds, yeah."
"Hmm," Robin nodded. "I'll keep that in mind."
Elias peered over Raj and Deidra to curiosily eye Robin. "Why do you want to test his limits, anyways?"
"Why do you make jokes?" Robin asked.
"Uh... 'cause they're funny?" Elias said.
"Exactly," Robin said.
Elias hummed, stroking his chin. "I don't think Hendrik finds that funny, though."
"You don't think so?" Robin asked.
"Yeah, but he definitely finds jokes Mel's pranks funny. You should work together with her next time," Elias said with a growing grin.
"I'll consider it," Robin said.
Elias's eyes naturally fell to Deidra, who seemed stiff between Robin and Raj.
"What do you think, Deidra?" Elias asks. "What's your favorite type of humor?"
Deidra blinked, and then looked at him almost as if she were shocked he'd spoken to her in the first place.
"Oh," she said quietly. "I, uh. I don't know, really. I haven't really thought about it."
"Whaaaaat?" Elias drew out quietly, surprised.
It sounded like she didn't even know what made her laugh. That couldn't be true, could it? No way that could be true.
"What makes you smile or laugh, then?" he asked instead.
Deidra hesitated.
"Uh..." Deidra started, but didn't finish as she stared down into her lap, looking conflicted.
Elias tried to wait for her to finish, but the silence was killing him inside. This wasn't supposed to be a hard question.
"What about, you know... the last time you smiled or laughed? Surely you remember that... right?" Elias asked, forcing a little laugh himself.
The embarassed look on Deidra's face seemed to speak for itself.
"It's been a long time," she said, scratching the back of her neck.
Elias didn't want to pick on her for something so trivial, so he turned his attention back to Robin and Raj.
"What about you guys? When's the last time you laughed, and what happened?" Elias asked.
Maybe stories could help Deidra loosen up a bit... or remember.
"I laughed at the whole beard shaving prank," Robin said, looking to Deidra. "Basically Mel used her magic to trick Hendrik into thinking that she'd shaved his face in his sleep, and he was so upset for like, a minute, until he touched his face and realized his beard was still intact. But his reaction was priceless."
"I don't really laugh at others' distress," Robin said with a little smirk. "I tend to laugh more at the quick-witted comments, so long as they're not cutting in a cruel way. Bo makes a lot of puns now and again. I enjoy those too, but I can't say I laugh at them so much."
"Bo's puns are hilarious," Elias said with a wide smile. "How does he think of so many on the spot?"
"I think he just does it so often that it comes naturally," Raj said. "Anything that's practiced comes easier."
"So... what you're saying is that his puns are a muscle. And he works out often," Elias deduced.
Raj huffed a small laugh and smiled.
"Sure," he said. "Yeah."
"He does that too," Robin said dryly.
"I know what we should do," Elias said confidently, turning his attention back to Deidra. "We could help you work out, too." He paused. "Uh. Humor-wise, not actual muscles. I don't think you need help with that."
Deidra looked at him blankly for a moment before she smiled ever so slightly.
"What, you want me to try to make... jokes?" she asked. "I don't think I'm very funny."
"We'll build confidence, not jokes. That's the first step," Elias said. "Maybe you could hang out with funny people, like Bo. I'm sure you'll be smiling in no time."
Deidra looked down shyly, nodding.
"Okay," she said. "Sounds... good."
Elias found his smile waning. Something about the tone of her voice felt strangely familiar. Like she had more to say, but it was easier to follow orders and comply.
"So, um," he went on, changing the subject. "How's your new life so far?"
She blinked again.
"Uh... it's fine," she said. "I'm adjusting."
There was a split second pause.
"You?" she blurted awkwardly.
"Adjusting, yeah, that's a good word," Elias said with a nod. "I think life's here pretty good so far. I know we're not exactly living normal lives, but it feels like I'm flying under the radar in comparison to life on Earth. It's kinda nice. And also nice to not have to worry about bad guys coming after me or my friends."
He paused and realized that maybe that was kind of offensive.
"No offense, sorry. That was a blanket statement, not aimed at you or anyone in particular here," he added on.
Deidra nodded and was quiet for a moment.
"It's... fine. I think I'm still getting used to not being under orders anymore," she said faintly. "Oliver's... orders."
Elias nodded. "I can't believe you got orders from the big guy. Or... small guy, since he's not like, the supreme ruler or whatever. Is he as socially awkward as people say he is?"
Deidra smiled faintly, but it seemed like she was quick to suppress it.
"Yeah," she said. "Though it's hard to tell if its an act, sometimes. It works well for him, though. People... underestimate him a lot."
"Yeah... clearly," Elias said. "Did you go to military school?"
Deidra nodded.
"You did too, right?" Deidra asked.
Elias shook his head. "No, I was a late straggler. I went straight to a base at eighteen. Which one were you at?"
"Palatine," Deidra answered.
"Oh, no way. I was there too," Elias said. "We went to the same base? Huh. Makes sense though... there's a lot of people with your magic there."
"How did you get out?" Deidra asked. "It's..."
She looked to Robin and Raj, who were both quietly listening.
"It's hard to get out," she said by way of explanation. "You can't just quit."
"Yeah... yeah, that's right," Elias said with a nod, starting to piece together the story that Elise told him. Frankly, he was so out of it, he still didn't really understand. "It was mostly my sister. Elise. It's been her plan for years to get me out. She had this whole network of doctors. There's a doctor on the base she was close friends with, and he helped smuggle me out, along with others. I feel bad for the guy now. I hope he's okay."
Deidra nodded slowly.
"Me too," she said. "For his sake."
Elias nodded as well, already forming another question to ask her. They apparently shared more history in common that he thought.
"So. What's military school like?" he asked.
"Well, it's uh, very strict," Deidra said. "You don't get a lot of freedom or free time, and all your time is scheduled out. You learn the same things you would in a normal school but there's a heavier focus on refining your powers--er, magic. You train day in, day out, every day until you're 18. It's hard work but you come out of it an expert at using your magic."
"That sounds terrible and insanely intense. Did anyone have a normal childhood?" Elias asked with a faint laugh.
"I don't think so," Deidra said. "Though I'm not sure what's considered normal."
"Like, you know. Not have to listen to orders every second of the day. Having freedom, friends, and many laughs. I think it's normal to run around as a kid because it's fun, not because some sergeant is telling you to run some laps. You know?" Elias said.
"Hm," Deidra said. "I guess I didn't have that, then."
It was kind of a depressing thought, but Elias knew Deidra didn't need to hear that.
"I think it's nice that you're self-aware of your background now though," he said. "I gave up talking to anyone on the base. Everyone seemed so cruel. You're not, though. It's too bad that we didn't connect earlier."
"I guess we just have the present, then," Deidra said.
"Wise," Elias said with a smile. He glanced at the others and noticed that Robin must have left sometime during their conversation, but Raj seemed to be comfortable listening along.
"Thanks for, uh," Deidra started. "Talking... to me. After everything."
Elias knew what she meant. The last time he saw her, she was following orders from Tula to break Eve's limbs to taunt James. Although, he couldn't say he remembered much of that since he was surrounded with soldiers, bleeding out from a bullet wound.
Huh. That happened, didn't it.
"Yeah, of course," he said with a growing smile. "I believe in second chances. I can also understand what you've been through, which helps, I think. But even if we didn't share a similar background, I think everyone deserves forgiveness if they're being sincere, don't you think?"
"I'd like to think so," she said.
"Was it hard? To come around and be sincere, after everything you've been through?" Elias asked.
A small, somber silence.
"Yes," Deidra said, looking down into her lap.
"How did you get the courage to change?" Elias asked, curious.
"It was... James, mostly," she said. "I don't know how he-- being captured and all, still... tried to see some good in me. I don't understand it."
"Ah... you've never had anyone believe in you before?"
"Not like that," Deidra said. "Everyone's always wanted to use me. But he... I mean, he didn't even ask me to help him escape. Another woman did because she couldn't do it herself but... he told me to go anyway. Even when he couldn't make it himself."
Elias tried to follow along, but he was a bit hung up on who this other woman was. Not Tula, right? Maybe a bounty hunter.
It didn't matter. Point was, Deidra was inspired by selfless acts. It was a nice feel-good story.
"Well... you're going to help us save James, right? I think he'd be proud to see how you turned around," he said.
Deidra looked down, seeming somber.
"I don't know about proud," she said quietly. "After everything I did to him... but I guess we'll see."
"You already seem to be a whole new person and it didn't take long for you to come around. I think that's something to be proud of, at least," Elias said.
Deidra nodded, but there was an awkward pause that followed after.
"Was it hard for you... after you left?" Deidra asked quietly.
Elias was about to ask her what she meant by that, but then he realized that the two of them were alone. Raj must've dipped out while they were talking. He didn't mean to take over their conversation, but at the same time, it was nice to openly talk to Deidra about this since she could better understand the context.
"Hmmmm. Well... hard, yeah. But not really in the way that you'd think," he said after thinking about it for a second. "I didn't need to adjust to a new life like you are now, because I don't think I ever really fit the military stereotype. But it was hard in the sense that it was kind of... overwhelming. Like it didn't feel real. I think I bawled for days because I was so worried that all of this would be taken away so quick. Wouldn't that be cruel? Thankfully nothing like that happened. So yeah. Life has been pretty good to me so far now, I think."
Deidra hummed.
"I keep worrying that it'll be taken away," she said quietly. "Or that somehow Oliver or his parents will find us here."
"Are you scared of them?" Elias asked.
A beat of silence.
"Of course I am," Deidra said. "Aren't you?"
Elias leaned forward so that his elbows were resting on his knees. He squinted ahead, trying to rack his brain for any possible reason to be scared of them. He should be, but he'd be lying if he said he was.
"Not really. Is that weird?" he said.
"...A little," Deidra said. "I would think you should be scared. Realistically."
Elias hummed, slowly sitting up straight again. "I think I was, at one point. Probably. But I guess I..." He weakly laughed. "Stopped caring."
"Ah..." was all Deidra said as she looked out into the forest, lips pressed into a thin line.
"I think it's totally fair to be scared of them, though. They held a lot of power over you and others. That's pretty scary."
"And they could undo time," Deidra said.
"So could Eve. Are you scared of her?" Elias countered.
Deidra swallowed and looked down.
"...Yes," she said.
"Hmmm," Elias drew out, stroking his chin again. "I guess that's not an uncommon thing to think if you don't know her. But I'm not scared of her either. Maybe time travelers just don't scare me?"
"I think that's just you, Elias," Deidra said.
Elias smiled. "Yeah. Maybe. I don't think I'm scared of many people anymore. Is that weird?"
"...maybe you should be a little more afraid of some people," Deidra said. "Some fear is good. It keeps you from being too reckless."
"Well, who told you that? The military?" Elias asked with a raised brow.
Deidra went quiet again.
"...Yyyyes," she said slowly.
It was a little funny to have this moment now. Elias had always dreamed of telling someone else in the military that their fundamentals were flawed, but he never did get the chance to have an open conversation. Until now.
"Don't you think they tell you that so you listen and obey orders?" he asked gently. "I'm not saying that we should have no fear. I have some fear, but personally I'm not afraid of people giving orders anymore. I think I've wasted too much of my time listening without question. I don't know, I guess all I'm saying is that you don't need to fear and blindly follow people with authority. At the end of the day, they're human too - just like you and I. And they're likely scared too."
Deidra's brows were pinched together like she was in deep thought, letting his words sink in.
"You know..." she said. "Oliver did seem really scared after James and Eve escaped the first time. So did his parents."
"Oh, you have to tell me how it all went down after they escaped," Elias said with a little laugh. "I heard it from James's perspective, but time got unpaused after he escaped, so he never knew their reactions outside of, you know, Tula going crazy when you found us six months later."
"Well... everyone was really freaked out," Deidra said. "I know now that what they did was they froze time, but it seemed, at the moment, that even those with time powers in the room didn't know what was going on. Ovrell practically threw a fit in rage, Oliver seemed stunned in silence, and Alina seemed so angry she just left and told Ovrell and Oliver to fix it. I had been... celebrating with Katya and Tula, but what it felt like for us was that we were toasting drinks, then something felt off, and before we knew it, we were being yelled at and were told to find them immediately."
"That's crazy. Did they ever figure out how they escaped, you think?" he asked.
Deidra frowned.
"I don't think so," she said. "I think that was part of what they wanted us to find out... before... you know. They didn't say that, but they didn't say they understood what happened either."
"What would they even do with all of this information, anyways? I didn't really understand why they were so interested in James," Elias said.
Deidra looked up at Elias.
"Really?" she asked.
Elias shifted his eyes between Deidra and the camp. "What, am I missing something?"
"I just... I don't know, I thought... it was kind of obvious," she said faintly. "He's a time mage, sure, but he's from a different world. A world where the magic is far more powerful than it is on Earth. Ovrell and Alina wanted to find a way to use James to get a hold of that."
"Well that's an ominous thought. Imagine that they really did come here with us. What would they even do? Magically find a dragon?" Elias said.
"I don't know," she said. "They seemed interested in dragons because of their power. But I think they were counting on James being some kind of guide or... liaison. The connection between the two worlds, I guess. I don't know how that would work out. It wasn't my job to know."
Elias hummed. "Do you think there's a way to travel back and forth between worlds? If so, would you ever go back?"
"I don't even know how I got here," Deidra said. "But if there was a way to go back, I don't think I would. The only thing waiting for me there would be Ovrell and Alina and Oliver, and I wouldn't want to return to them without James... and Tula."
Elias nodded. "So you're still friends with Tula?"
Deidra looked down into her lap again.
"I don't know. She hasn't talked to me since I left. She reached out once and then never spoke to me again," Deidra said. "She hasn't even tried looking through my eyes."
"Is she upset that you left?" Elias asked.
"Yes," Deidra said. "She's... I've never heard her sound so hurt before. And I know when she's acting or not."
Elias was quiet for a moment.
"Maybe she misses you," he said.
"I know she does," Deidra said quietly. "I miss her too."
"If she does look through your eyes again..." Elias began as he faced her with curiosity. "What would you say?"
Deidra sighed and looked out into the forest, quiet for a few seconds as she appeared to be thinking through her answer.
"I'd tell her I miss her," she said. "And I'd ask her to... to try to find a way out, I think. I don't think she's caught on, yet, but I think Rita is using her, and I don't think she can be trusted. She reminds me of the kind of person you'd run into in the Gaea. They have silver tongues but the moment they're done with you they throw you out. I just don't want to see that happen to Tula. I don't think she'd know what to do with herself. Especially without me there."
Elias nodded slowly, trying to take in every word. She sounded sincere and confident in her answer.
"You're a good friend, Deidra. I think you can help Tula come around," he said.
"I... I hope so," Deidra said. "I just know... she's probably blaming James for everything. I don't know. Ever since we got here, I think she's been... blaming him for everything that's gone wrong, even the stuff that has nothing to do with him."
"Has she always had that behavior when things go wrong?" Elias asked.
"Yeah... she has a tendency to pick a scapegoat and then everything becomes their fault," she said. "She did that all the way back in school when we were kids, too."
"Have you ever talked about this with her? Or, you know, about any other stuff that's bad that she doesn't know about?"
Deidra swallowed.
"I... never really thought to bring it up," she said. "She'd always kind of been... my superior."
A pause.
"Well, she acted like my superior, even if we were partners," she said. "Tula was the one who got the job to work directly under Ovrell and Oliver. She gets to pick who she wants as her partner on the job to be more of the... brawn, as needed. And she always picked me."
"But she always picked you because you're her friend too, right? So she must value your opinion. She seems to also respect your decision to leave, so... I think that counts for something," Elias said.
"I guess it does," Deidra agreed.
"You were inspired to change by selfless acts from James and others. So maybe Tula could use the same treatment. And if that comes from a friend... well, friends are the best people to bring change for others," Elias said with a smile. "I'm sure we'll run into her again. You'll have another opportunity to see her again. You'll see."
Deidra looked encouraged, but the brightness in her eyes only lasted a moment.
"It's likely we'll only see her again in the context of confrontation," she said seriously.
"Right. But by then, you'd be a master of funny jokes. And you'll not only reason with her, but make her laugh. Crisis avoided," Elias said, still with the lingering smile.
"Ha," Deidra said without a smile. "If only life worked that way."
"I think it's better to imagine positive outcomes rather than anything that could go wrong. It's something to shoot for, you know? I don't think it's unrealistic to think that Tula could be convinced to change her way of thinking, especially if you can guide her."
"I... I suppose I can try," Deidra said. "Yeah. I can try."
"To guide her or say a funny joke?" Elias said with a growing grin.
"...Both," Deidra said stiffly.
Elias beamed. "I look forward to it."
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