z

Young Writers Society


Sushi Critic



User avatar
229 Reviews



Gender: Female
Points: 11589
Reviews: 229
Tue May 28, 2013 9:32 pm
SushiSashimi333 says...



Salutations and welcome to Sushi Critic! I will critique anything except for:
poetry (I can but I don't like to)
lyrics (you will hate me, I promise you that)
non-fiction (I tend to get bored)
super mushy romance (with duper mushy things)

Fan fiction will be accepted as long as you tell me what your story is based off of.

If you are to ask for a review it would be nice to
1. start from the beginning of your story or series.
2. give me a brief summary of your story or what it's about.
3. Tell me what you specifically want reviewed (i.e. grammar, plot, etc.) if anything.
After all this is done just paste a link and I shall get to you asap! :mrgreen:
(P.S. I tend to be very strict so tell me whether you would like full criticism, half or just to some advice for in the future)
Last edited by SushiSashimi333 on Sun Jun 30, 2013 5:54 pm, edited 5 times in total.
Sushi
  





Random avatar


Gender: None specified
Points: 469
Reviews: 31
Wed May 29, 2013 9:28 am
View Likes
Bobbywalker says...



I need a review ASAP! I have my exams tomorrow, and I need help with developing my writing. If you could review this before this evening, I'd be super happy! work.php?id=101795
"We are all equal, for we are all nothing"

Bobby. You so stupid.
  





User avatar
229 Reviews



Gender: Female
Points: 11589
Reviews: 229
Sat Jun 22, 2013 2:14 am
SushiSashimi333 says...



bobbywalker wrote:I need a review ASAP! I have my exams tomorrow, and I need help with developing my writing. If you could review this before this evening, I'd be super happy! Practicing for exams - The Wife

Sorry I wasn't able to get it done on time. I hope that my review helped though.
Sushi
  





User avatar



Gender: Male
Points: 348
Reviews: 4
Wed Jun 26, 2013 5:51 pm
View Likes
MrTilgen says...



So I was wondering If you could review my work. So far I have one chapter done with my book "Highway to Inferno." Here is a synopsis:

A professional serial killer who is also a trucker named Douglas Macintyre targets couples in areas where highways exist and where sheriffs don’t. He follows a path of murdering and brutally torturing innocent couples and leaves a mysterious path. Jason Parkers, an FBI agent in the training academy gets recruited by special FBI agent Jonathan Houston after the remains of Nate Cornell were found near a highway. His fiancé is still reported as missing. Jason Parkers and Jonathan Houston are determined to track down Douglas Macintyre’s path of murders and to find Nate’s fiancé before she is murdered too.

I need a little bit of advice on grammar. I also need to know, would it be more suspenseful if the book didn't reveal the killer's identity that's traveling with Nate and Audrey or would it be more suspenseful If the book already revealed the killer's identity in the beginning?
  





User avatar
229 Reviews



Gender: Female
Points: 11589
Reviews: 229
Wed Jun 26, 2013 6:07 pm
SushiSashimi333 says...



@MrTilgen - Sure, I'll get to that right away. Look for a PM (personal message) about my opinion on the suspense thing.
Sushi
  





User avatar
214 Reviews



Gender: Female
Points: 14468
Reviews: 214
Thu Jun 27, 2013 11:12 am
View Likes
artybirdy says...



It's not a novel, just a short poem I came up with. It would be massively appreciated if you could check it out and share your thoughts. Thank you so much in advance!

A Short Poem
[center]Previously known as ArtStyx[/center]
  





User avatar
229 Reviews



Gender: Female
Points: 11589
Reviews: 229
Thu Jun 27, 2013 5:18 pm
SushiSashimi333 says...



@ArtStyx - I'll do my best :)
Sushi
  





User avatar
21 Reviews



Gender: Female
Points: 2238
Reviews: 21
Fri Jun 28, 2013 9:01 pm
View Likes
singingwriter1673 says...



Hey :)
I was wondering if you could review my piece here: The Past (1)

I'd like some feedback so that I can use it when I continue. You can just go all out on the review. Grammar, suggestions, etc.

Thanks!
:D Sarah
Sweet Sarah
  





User avatar
229 Reviews



Gender: Female
Points: 11589
Reviews: 229
Fri Jun 28, 2013 9:45 pm
View Likes
SushiSashimi333 says...



@singingwriter1673 - Got your message. Might take a little while since Review Day is coming up and all, but consider your piece done once the month is out! ^_^
Sushi :D
Sushi
  





User avatar
21 Reviews



Gender: Female
Points: 2238
Reviews: 21




User avatar
24 Reviews



Gender: Female
Points: 726
Reviews: 24
Fri Jun 28, 2013 10:17 pm
View Likes
Yazi says...



Hi! :) I was hoping you could give me a review on Fallacy? It's two chapters that I posted and it's a bit long but please don't be discouraged by it? hahaha I would really appreciate it!
Always be a poet, even in prose.
-Charles Baudelaire
  





User avatar
229 Reviews



Gender: Female
Points: 11589
Reviews: 229
Fri Jun 28, 2013 10:30 pm
SushiSashimi333 says...



@Yazi - I shall as soon as review day comes around. Is there anything in particular that you want reviewed?
Sushi
  





User avatar
24 Reviews



Gender: Female
Points: 726
Reviews: 24
Fri Jun 28, 2013 10:36 pm
View Likes
Yazi says...



It's called Fallacy :) Thanks so much!
Always be a poet, even in prose.
-Charles Baudelaire
  





User avatar
229 Reviews



Gender: Female
Points: 11589
Reviews: 229
Mon Jul 01, 2013 9:08 pm
SushiSashimi333 says...



@Yazi and @singingwriter1673 - finished them both, hope my reviews help! ;)
Sushi
  





User avatar
15 Reviews



Gender: Male
Points: 411
Reviews: 15
Tue Sep 17, 2013 3:23 am
View Likes
wildwildcat says...



Hello! I would very much appreciate a critical review for my ongoing story, A Week for the World.
Plot criticism would be very helpful.
A Week For the World: Day 1 :Part 1
The quick summary is: Desmond is our cynical protagonist, and Armageddon's coming in a week. I'm sorry I don't want to give too much away.
  








"Be happy, my friend; and if you obey me in this one request, remain satisfied that nothing on earth will have the power to interrupt my tranquility."
— Mary Shelley, Frankenstein