Young Writers Society

Carlito wrote:I'll try to get to yours tomorrow @horrendous (if not tomorrow, definitely Sunday!!)

cool, thanks for the quick response

Hey, I'm here again!

Name of Work: Bad Lights, Good Lights (placeholder title)
Genre: Fantasy, suspense, mystery, drama
Link: Bad Lights, Good Lights (Chapter One Point Three - Edited One Time)
Special requests: Whichever review style you think is the best
Important information: A teenage girl found a red light in her toilet. It said its other people - the bad ones were going to threaten humankind and they need to stop those people by looking for other teenagers with good lights.

@horrendous! Your review is finished

Hey @Lightsong welcome back! Your review is finished! (Sorry for the wait!)


And I updated my opening post stuff...again

Hi, if you'd review any one of the stories I uploaded (preferably Catalina or Turn Everything Over), it'd be cool. Meanwhile I'll probably get to reviewing some of your stuff since I need points to upload the next part of my trilogy. I like criticism because it helps me improve more than kind words, so don't be afraid to get harsh with the new guy. Thanks a bunch!

can you review prologue and first chapter of my action adventure in fantasy setting, Monster Hunt?
https://www.youngwriterssociety.com/work/Mikons3/Monster-Hunt-122929
Please leave your comment on my blend of first person narration and objective narration, did it achieve and effect I could not otherwise ?
Don't hesitate to shred text to pieces, I am very welcoming of critique.

Hey @tigeraye! I reviewed one of your stories! (Sorry for the delay!) Let me know if you'd like me to review any of the others. And if you'd like to review something of mine, the only things I'm really looking for feedback on are in the folder How to Conquer Monsters. It's all lyrics, so if that's not your cup of tea, no worries!

@Mikons3 your review is finished!

Hi Carlito!

Can you review this for me?
This was supposed to be 500 word story about a guy whose wife leaves him for a mannequin, but I lost track and now there’s not much mannequin in it and I ended up adding a weird portal which I don’t think I talked about as much as I should’ve. Please rip it apart. My English is basically a bastardized version of an incomplete British education and American pop culture based off Disney Channel, so I have this habit of using phrases that sound very funny and are totally wrong. If you encounter any of this, please talk about why they don’t work. That would help me a lot.

I’m not really that good in reviewing, but I would be happy to review anything you want me to, as long as it’s not poetry, ’cause I don’t get poetry.
Thanks!

Hi @Unconsoled! Your review is finished!

If you're interested in reviewing something of mine, please see the post a few about this one to tigeraye about what I'm looking for review for. (And if it's not your cup of tea, no worries!)

Hi Carlito!
Do you think you could possibly review my work in progress, Lone Voice Radio? I specifically need some critiques on chapters 6, 7, and 8.
Here's the link: profile/jumpingsheep/portfolio

I would like some comments on characterization and pacing in these chapters, which is something I really focused on.

If you need a summary of what happened beforehand, hit me up with a PM and I can send one to you!

Thank you!

@jumpingsheep your reviews are finished!

PS - loooove your avatar. So cute <3

*gets blue star #2* Thank you for your help!

Now looking for help in acquiring blue star #3!

Hello!

I would love it if you could review a series of short stories that I wrote only recently. I feel like it has some major issues, like nobody being able to understand what it's really about. Also, it'd be great if you could take a look at the characters and the overall tone of the story.

Steps into the Mirror - 1/?

Steps into the Mirror - 2/?

Steps into the Mirror - 3/?

Thank you!

Hey, I'm here again!

Name of Work: When Dream and Reality Collide (placeholder title)
Genre: Supernatural, romance, drama, mystery
Link: When Dream and Reality Collide [Chapter 1.2]
Special requests: Whichever review style you think is the best
Important information: Aiden had been dreaming about the tiger and couldn't find out the significance of it. He met Theo, a foreign student with striking similarities with it. As Theo arrived, strange things started to happen and Aiden experienced other dreams, ones that were bothering him. With the surprising revelation waiting for him and the shadow war going on, could he save not just one world, but also the one he thought never existed?

Never mind.